so many factors: JW sexual suppression, marrying young as virgins with no relationship experience, the Watchtower's preoccupation with sexual "morality," the false notion that JWs are the "best" and "worldlies" the worst, piss poor sex education among JWs. . . . . . . . . etc.
Posts by TMS
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15Virgin or whore complex that Witnesses have made my married life difficult!
by Witness 007 inso was a virgin when i got married but my wife studied later in life and had been married for 6 months and had two boyfriends in her past.
my strict witness mother hated my wife and thought she was not good enough for me.
she thought all worldly women were dirty whores who cannot keep their vaginas to themselves.
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37
Avoiding Temptation As a Young Elder
by TMS init was the summer of '72.
i was 24 but had been the presiding overseer or congregation servant of a small congregation in the county seat of an arkansas county for about 3 years.. my regular pioneer wife of nearly four years was big and pregnant, with our attempts at birth control unsuccessful.. one of my wife's several bible studies was with a young woman named brenda whom my wife had encountered in door to door work.. brenda had two young children she could barely handle and was married to a very countryfied arkie named henry who worked as a chicken catcher, one of the most difficult jobs at the local chicken plant.. brenda eventually revealed that she'd been raised as a jw, but was never baptized, having left home to marry henry at age 14. she spoke of her family in texas, mentioning her mother and two older sisters, all jws she said.. one morning, just before the meeting for field service, we noticed a small car in kingdom hall parking lot.
my wife and i were parked to one side of the hall in our aluminum nashua house trailer.. two young women got out of the car and soon joined us for the meeting for service, identifying themselves as brenda's sisters from texas.. the two girls, ages 17 and 20, were distractingly beautiful, with the eldest decked out like a magnificent southern belle including hat and heels, her high-end clothing accentuating her very obvious curves.. with no one else showing up for field service, it ended up just the four of us in the car group with the two texas girls in the back seat.. starting our time at a not-at-home, the 20 year old asked if she could accompany me to "hear my presentation.
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TMS
@Rivergang,
In 1970, when I was 21, the Watchtower Society sent me 1200 miles from my home to become the Presiding Overseer or Congregation Servant in Arkansas. The elder arrangment didn't kick in until 1972 and I was appointed an elder on the first go round.
My new situation was filled with land mines. The former Congregation Servant had been disfellowshipped and the Circuit Overseer had recommended a 55 year old man with overseer experience as the replacement. He was serving in that capacity when I pulled into town.
The older man, bitter at his being passed over, attempted to undermine me at every juncture. Cronie es of the disfellowshipped man pressured me to reinstate the child-molesting former elder as soon as possible.
Having lived on my own since the age of 16, I had some life experience and tried to always think thing through clearly. I'm not embarrassed by any of my decision-making.
I did not "throw stones."
I'm 74 now and still gaining life experience, but no longer a JW.
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37
Avoiding Temptation As a Young Elder
by TMS init was the summer of '72.
i was 24 but had been the presiding overseer or congregation servant of a small congregation in the county seat of an arkansas county for about 3 years.. my regular pioneer wife of nearly four years was big and pregnant, with our attempts at birth control unsuccessful.. one of my wife's several bible studies was with a young woman named brenda whom my wife had encountered in door to door work.. brenda had two young children she could barely handle and was married to a very countryfied arkie named henry who worked as a chicken catcher, one of the most difficult jobs at the local chicken plant.. brenda eventually revealed that she'd been raised as a jw, but was never baptized, having left home to marry henry at age 14. she spoke of her family in texas, mentioning her mother and two older sisters, all jws she said.. one morning, just before the meeting for field service, we noticed a small car in kingdom hall parking lot.
my wife and i were parked to one side of the hall in our aluminum nashua house trailer.. two young women got out of the car and soon joined us for the meeting for service, identifying themselves as brenda's sisters from texas.. the two girls, ages 17 and 20, were distractingly beautiful, with the eldest decked out like a magnificent southern belle including hat and heels, her high-end clothing accentuating her very obvious curves.. with no one else showing up for field service, it ended up just the four of us in the car group with the two texas girls in the back seat.. starting our time at a not-at-home, the 20 year old asked if she could accompany me to "hear my presentation.
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TMS
JeffT,
So much is driving a young JW sister to lock in on a potential mate. In the JW world, a female's primary self-worth comes from snagging a husband, hopefully an elder. As a Regular Pioneer, she becomes only a suitable candidate for the role of elder's wife, the ultimate attainment for a JW female.
So to the normal need for sex, companionship, family and/or children, a JW woman is unfulfilled until she finds an elder husband.
My first wife and I pioneered with a JW sister who actually hated field service, never had or even wanted a Bible study, but married a young man who became a circuit overseer. Her life is fulfilled. She made it!
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37
Avoiding Temptation As a Young Elder
by TMS init was the summer of '72.
i was 24 but had been the presiding overseer or congregation servant of a small congregation in the county seat of an arkansas county for about 3 years.. my regular pioneer wife of nearly four years was big and pregnant, with our attempts at birth control unsuccessful.. one of my wife's several bible studies was with a young woman named brenda whom my wife had encountered in door to door work.. brenda had two young children she could barely handle and was married to a very countryfied arkie named henry who worked as a chicken catcher, one of the most difficult jobs at the local chicken plant.. brenda eventually revealed that she'd been raised as a jw, but was never baptized, having left home to marry henry at age 14. she spoke of her family in texas, mentioning her mother and two older sisters, all jws she said.. one morning, just before the meeting for field service, we noticed a small car in kingdom hall parking lot.
my wife and i were parked to one side of the hall in our aluminum nashua house trailer.. two young women got out of the car and soon joined us for the meeting for service, identifying themselves as brenda's sisters from texas.. the two girls, ages 17 and 20, were distractingly beautiful, with the eldest decked out like a magnificent southern belle including hat and heels, her high-end clothing accentuating her very obvious curves.. with no one else showing up for field service, it ended up just the four of us in the car group with the two texas girls in the back seat.. starting our time at a not-at-home, the 20 year old asked if she could accompany me to "hear my presentation.
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TMS
@stan,
I met my wife in Cagayan de Oro in 2018. We've been married three years. She's an absolutely wonderful wife, household manager and companion.
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37
Avoiding Temptation As a Young Elder
by TMS init was the summer of '72.
i was 24 but had been the presiding overseer or congregation servant of a small congregation in the county seat of an arkansas county for about 3 years.. my regular pioneer wife of nearly four years was big and pregnant, with our attempts at birth control unsuccessful.. one of my wife's several bible studies was with a young woman named brenda whom my wife had encountered in door to door work.. brenda had two young children she could barely handle and was married to a very countryfied arkie named henry who worked as a chicken catcher, one of the most difficult jobs at the local chicken plant.. brenda eventually revealed that she'd been raised as a jw, but was never baptized, having left home to marry henry at age 14. she spoke of her family in texas, mentioning her mother and two older sisters, all jws she said.. one morning, just before the meeting for field service, we noticed a small car in kingdom hall parking lot.
my wife and i were parked to one side of the hall in our aluminum nashua house trailer.. two young women got out of the car and soon joined us for the meeting for service, identifying themselves as brenda's sisters from texas.. the two girls, ages 17 and 20, were distractingly beautiful, with the eldest decked out like a magnificent southern belle including hat and heels, her high-end clothing accentuating her very obvious curves.. with no one else showing up for field service, it ended up just the four of us in the car group with the two texas girls in the back seat.. starting our time at a not-at-home, the 20 year old asked if she could accompany me to "hear my presentation.
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TMS
No. The guilt would have been overwhelming. I had a loyal, loving wife for 49.5 years. We left JW together. Since her death I've remarried to a fantastic filipina 33 years my junior and life is very good. When I originally left JW I told myself that I was now free to become an adulterer, thief, criminal or anything I wanted, but I realized that my values were actually mine, not some phony religious belief system.
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37
Avoiding Temptation As a Young Elder
by TMS init was the summer of '72.
i was 24 but had been the presiding overseer or congregation servant of a small congregation in the county seat of an arkansas county for about 3 years.. my regular pioneer wife of nearly four years was big and pregnant, with our attempts at birth control unsuccessful.. one of my wife's several bible studies was with a young woman named brenda whom my wife had encountered in door to door work.. brenda had two young children she could barely handle and was married to a very countryfied arkie named henry who worked as a chicken catcher, one of the most difficult jobs at the local chicken plant.. brenda eventually revealed that she'd been raised as a jw, but was never baptized, having left home to marry henry at age 14. she spoke of her family in texas, mentioning her mother and two older sisters, all jws she said.. one morning, just before the meeting for field service, we noticed a small car in kingdom hall parking lot.
my wife and i were parked to one side of the hall in our aluminum nashua house trailer.. two young women got out of the car and soon joined us for the meeting for service, identifying themselves as brenda's sisters from texas.. the two girls, ages 17 and 20, were distractingly beautiful, with the eldest decked out like a magnificent southern belle including hat and heels, her high-end clothing accentuating her very obvious curves.. with no one else showing up for field service, it ended up just the four of us in the car group with the two texas girls in the back seat.. starting our time at a not-at-home, the 20 year old asked if she could accompany me to "hear my presentation.
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TMS
Just to add: Of course, this "girl" would now be in her early 70's. As I reflect, it's obvious I was oblivious to the plan, but others knew what was going on. There was no way I was going to destroy my marriage, lose all my Theocratic privileges for a fling, but I'm curious as to how this young woman could be so brazen, so bold.
Now, that I think about it, the younger girl, although not flirtatious, was actually more intriguing; tall, slender with dark Romanian features. We sat in the car while the other two made the next call. The girl was doing a penciled self-portrait that was actually quite good. She so reminded me of the Eagles "Witchy Woman" just released June 1, 1972.
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37
Avoiding Temptation As a Young Elder
by TMS init was the summer of '72.
i was 24 but had been the presiding overseer or congregation servant of a small congregation in the county seat of an arkansas county for about 3 years.. my regular pioneer wife of nearly four years was big and pregnant, with our attempts at birth control unsuccessful.. one of my wife's several bible studies was with a young woman named brenda whom my wife had encountered in door to door work.. brenda had two young children she could barely handle and was married to a very countryfied arkie named henry who worked as a chicken catcher, one of the most difficult jobs at the local chicken plant.. brenda eventually revealed that she'd been raised as a jw, but was never baptized, having left home to marry henry at age 14. she spoke of her family in texas, mentioning her mother and two older sisters, all jws she said.. one morning, just before the meeting for field service, we noticed a small car in kingdom hall parking lot.
my wife and i were parked to one side of the hall in our aluminum nashua house trailer.. two young women got out of the car and soon joined us for the meeting for service, identifying themselves as brenda's sisters from texas.. the two girls, ages 17 and 20, were distractingly beautiful, with the eldest decked out like a magnificent southern belle including hat and heels, her high-end clothing accentuating her very obvious curves.. with no one else showing up for field service, it ended up just the four of us in the car group with the two texas girls in the back seat.. starting our time at a not-at-home, the 20 year old asked if she could accompany me to "hear my presentation.
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TMS
It was the summer of '72. I was 24 but had been the presiding overseer or Congregation Servant of a small congregation in the county seat of an Arkansas county for about 3 years.
My Regular Pioneer wife of nearly four years was big and pregnant, with our attempts at birth control unsuccessful.
One of my wife's several Bible studies was with a young woman named Brenda whom my wife had encountered in door to door work.
Brenda had two young children she could barely handle and was married to a very countryfied Arkie named Henry who worked as a chicken catcher, one of the most difficult jobs at the local chicken plant.
Brenda eventually revealed that she'd been raised as a JW, but was never baptized, having left home to marry Henry at age 14. She spoke of her family in Texas, mentioning her mother and two older sisters, all JWs she said.
One morning, just before the meeting for field service, we noticed a small car in Kingdom Hall parking lot. My wife and I were parked to one side of the hall in our aluminum Nashua house trailer.
Two young women got out of the car and soon joined us for the meeting for service, identifying themselves as Brenda's sisters from Texas.
The two girls, ages 17 and 20, were distractingly beautiful, with the eldest decked out like a magnificent southern belle including hat and heels, her high-end clothing accentuating her very obvious curves.
With no one else showing up for field service, it ended up just the four of us in the car group with the two Texas girls in the back seat.
Starting our time at a not-at-home, the 20 year old asked if she could accompany me to "hear my presentation." I obliged.
At that first door, we were invited in and the Texas girl sat directly next to me on the sofa, a little too close for comfort.
As I went into my presentation, my sofa companion nodded at my every word and followed the scriptures in her own Bible, smiling approvingly when the householder responded to my questions.
To politely end the discussion, the householder said she was very busy and then, turning to the Texas girl, she said: "I'm sure, as a minister's wife, you would understand."
Neither the Texas girl nor I corrected the householder's impression that we were a married couple. I remember thinking that, if this was not my wife, how could I explain how closely we were joined on the sofa. That would have been more difficult than simply allowing the misconception to stand.
Honestly, I was incredibly turned on by this extraordinarily beautiful young woman sitting so tightly next to me, not to mention, playing the role of my wife so naturally despite my pregnant wife outside in the car.
Later that night at the Kingdom Hall meeting, the girl put on quite a show, commenting intelligently while seemingly intent on my every word.
After the meeting, I was approached by a teenage sister who had something to say.
Naming the older of the two Texas girls, she said: "She came here for you."
When I laughed that off, saying I was married and about to be a father, she doubled down: "Even so, she came here to get you."
Although I didn't take advantage of whatever opportunity had been presented, Brenda's husband Henry sought me out about two weeks later. He had no interest in being a JW and we'd seldom said anything to each other beyond "hello."
With his wife Brenda trying to stop him, Henry told me how his sister-in-law and one of the "JW ministers" were "kissing like crazy" and then went into her bedroom while he and Brenda were visiting the family.
"I don't know what they did in there for over half an hour, but they came out of the room totally red-faced," explained Henry, chuckling.
I think he wanted me to know that I'd dodged a bullet or maybe just wanted a big laugh at JWs.
I've thought and even fantasized about this potential incident from over 50 years ago. It came to mind just last night and I remembered I'd never shared it on JWD.
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76
Posters You Miss
by minimus inanyone that you miss from this site, dead or alive??.
i miss farkel, blondie and a host of others!.
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TMS
Hillary_Step, AlanF, James. . certainly. I read Friend's reasonable comments on the H2O board. There was also a little troll who invaded serious discussion, getting under everyone's skin. I forget his handle.
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31
Are You An Angry Exjw At This Point In Your Life?
by minimus ini’ve been here for many years.
the tone seems to be different in this place.
not so many pissed off exjws .
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TMS
The anger dissipates. It hurts that I wasted fifty years of life, but, in the last twenty, I utilized whatever acquired skills I had in pursuits I've actually enjoyed.
I've covered political corruption in Texas on a blog with millions of pageviews, gone about homeschooling a precocious eight year old grandson, while caring for my wife through four strokes.
My retirement is not what it could have been monetarily, but adequate.
I feel genuinely respected in my community, more so than in my thirty years as an elder.
This peace was not reached instantly, with years of nightmares reliving unpleasant JW incidents, work conflict at my forty year entry level job, going over my life each night during REM.
What always angered me the most were the things I WISH I had said, the situations I could have handled so much better NOW.
But, that's all gone.
I'm at peace now.
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9
My Thanksgiving Tradition As One of Jehovah's Witnesses
by TMS inthe jw prohibition of celebrating holidays includes the american celebration of thanksgiving, a sort of innocuous harvest festival, where thanks is given for the year's blessings.
a typical family eats a large meal together, including turkey and all the trimmings.
in recent decades, nfl football, always involving the dallas cowboys and detroit lions, has become part of the routine, as well as drinking beer.. every year or so, the "awake!
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TMS
The JW prohibition of celebrating holidays includes the American celebration of Thanksgiving, a sort of innocuous harvest festival, where thanks is given for the year's blessings. A typical family eats a large meal together, including turkey and all the trimmings. In recent decades, NFL football, always involving the Dallas Cowboys and Detroit Lions, has become part of the routine, as well as drinking beer.
Every year or so, the "Awake!" would run an article denouncing Thanksgiving as "worldly,," sometimes making fun of the supposed original meal featuring the pilgrims and Native Americans.
My extended family, almost entirely made up of JWs, actually celebrated Thanksgiving every year without admitting it.
As my uncle Russ, a former Zone Servant, old old term for Circuit Overseer, would say every year: "Turkey is cheap and we have a day off, so why not get together for a meal?"
My uncle Gene, who never set foot in a Kingdom Hall, after getting out of prison during World War II for not serving in the military, and his Catholic wife, Ann, were always the host family. Ann made a huge spread, including certain favorite dishes for several JW relatives.
My anointed grandfather, Adolph, would be asked to say "grace" over the meal.
After the meal, Uncle Gene would light up a cigar, while fending off any attempt by any of his guests to witness to him.
I continued the tradition with my own family, sometimes eating turkey a day early to soothe out consciences.
Our pretense of not celebrating Thanksgiving like everyone else was phony, but typical of the kind of rationalizations JWs make to get around organizational rules and beliefs.