Posts by thankyou

77

In The Name of Love, Need Your Opinion

by thankyou in

i'm non-jw.. been following this forum.

most of you folks have been through hell, but are still loving souls.

i'm reeeally impressed and glad to be here.. my question is at the end of this.

thankyou

Thank you very much to all you kind folks who have taken the time to give me your loving, best advice.

Every sentence in every post is loaded with stuff that I need to think about carefully.

In the meantime, I will not call her tomorrow, Thanksgiving Day. Thank you. That's the kind of help I needed.

Just to answer your questions. Yes, the two girlfriends that I have been fading from do know each other. One is hurt-angry. The other one is confident. But, they avoid each other.

I am white, she's black. I mention it only in case I am missing some cultural thing that will help me.

mommyfirstandalways:

Good question. I know what you are saying. To the best of my self-awareness I'm not motivated by any challenge that she may represent.

This is not enjoyable. And, honestly my "ego" is not hurt either.

It's just that we connected ever so deeply, at least until her JW beliefs were triggered.

Based on what was said and done, I know she cares about me. But she has been tormented by her JW beliefs.

I know she's counting on me to bring her out of this. I would much rather I get hurt than her.

I'm afraid that if I forget about her, probably not possible, her JW beliefs will be confirmation in her mind that I was just another worldly insincere person AND SHE WILL BE PUSHED HOPELESSLY EVEN DEEPER INTO JW. Lousy analogy but it's like trying to dive in to save a drowning person that you really care about.

77

In The Name of Love, Need Your Opinion

by thankyou in

i'm non-jw.. been following this forum.

most of you folks have been through hell, but are still loving souls.

i'm reeeally impressed and glad to be here.. my question is at the end of this.

thankyou

I'm Non-JW.

Been following this forum. Most of you folks have been through Hell, but are still loving souls. I'm reeeally impressed and glad to be here.

My question is at the end of this. Basically I've posted my story elsewhere, but in summary:

Met a cute black girl(JW, formerly a Methodist) . We "hung out" for about 2 weeks. I was seriously attracted to her looks, personality, character, soul. The attraction was mutual.

Everything was fine until I made the mistake of verbalizing my "feelings" for her. It seemed to set off a "danger" alarm in her mind. Conduct was ok, but not orally expressing it. She said we cannot be boyfriend-girlfriend cause she is a JW.

Slowly she backed away. No angry or terminating words, just quietly, physically walked away.

Most of you have said, because of the JW forget her, that nothing good can come from this, only more heartache.

But, I'm trying to be true to my own heart and pursue her. She told me at the beginning that it wouldn't be easy because she is a JW.

I know there is a part of her that remains unaffected by her JW beliefs. I know that she wants me to succeed.

At first when I called her, she wouldn't answer or return my calls. Then, she started answering, but brushing me off kind of coldly.

Now when I call she gives me time to first greet her and still brushes me off with the JW thing, but does it in a warm kind way.

So, I feel like I'm making progress in baby steps.

I always have tremendous anxiety before calling her because I don't know what to expect, she could have cancelled her phone or something.

But, I try to summon up the courage, not only cause I want her, but because I know she wants me to succeed. But, unfortunately, there is no instruction booklet.

Anyway, (whew), my question:

Tomorrow being Thanskgiving, I want to call her, not to mention the words "Thanksgiving", but just to connect to her cause it is an important day for society/family. I realize JW do not celebrate Thanksgiving. Haven't called her for a week and a half. Should I call her on Thanksgiving Day?

p.s. When I met this girl I had 2 very attractive girl friends. Actually much better looking than this girl. But, I've forgotten about them. That's how I feel about this gal. It's like the gal who posted w/in the last few days about her having found "real" love.

Thank you

31

heart troubles

by zeb in

jw
friends

dear all,.

my health took a beating over the years with stress from various sources, not a little from the wt; and dangerous areas of work involving fumes and so on.

the arc also took its toll and i have had recently a heart attack.

thankyou

Dear Zeb,

Yup, we're all going through stuff.

Don't worry!

The truth -THE TRUTH - is that you are just fine right now, you always have been, and you always will be.

John

15

What Is She Thinking?

by thankyou in

i'm a non-jw guy.. joined this forum 2 weeks ago to learn about jw.

i enjoy the valuable intelligence, humor, and "community" it provides.. question:.

it appears that a non-jw guy is "off limits" to a jw girl-gal.

thankyou

Alive. Thank you so very much for taking the time to share your insight.

The way you explained things is perfectly aligned with what her recent conduct has been.

"huge internal mental pressure", "haunted by fears of Satan's cunning", "mentally break the more sensitive". I suspected this is what was going on with her . It gives me a lot to think about.

I have seen all the signs of this. The almost frantic fear. At the same time we have a strong mutual desire for each other.

If her JW beliefs win out, then that will be the solution, game over.

As of now, I still would like to have her in my life in some way.

But that's a big moral responsibility. I don't want to play REAL God and get between God and her. Only God knows what path she needs to take.

But, I am really attracted to her spiritually and mentally. The physical is there too, but it's just like that's just part of the natural deal.

"mentally break the more sensitive". She is very intelligent and sensitive. I don't want my pursuing her to mess her up. We are almost like "twins", we're on the same wave length thought-wise. It's like all of life so far was just preparing us to meet at this time.

I had an older brother who had residual problems from the Vietnam era whom I took care of for 8 years. So a tiny bit of familiarity w/cognitive problems. Why would one voluntarily want to undertake such a thing. I don't know, I just feel a strong spiritual duty to help this gal.

I guess a lot people don't believe in God. I happen to be one who does. Couple weeks ago I was hurting over this and praying to God for help. He told me He will "give" her to me, but that I need to be patient. But, that could have just been my wishful thinking too.

Alive, thank you again so much. Your words really clarify how deep this thing is.

Any advice/insight etc. anyone can give will be sincerely appreciated!

15

What Is She Thinking?

by thankyou in

i'm a non-jw guy.. joined this forum 2 weeks ago to learn about jw.

i enjoy the valuable intelligence, humor, and "community" it provides.. question:.

it appears that a non-jw guy is "off limits" to a jw girl-gal.

thankyou

Black Sheep, thank you. There's a lot of wisdom in those 2 sentences.

Pete Zahut, thank you for the scriptural references and the JW interpretation as the basis for how a JW gal is likely to be thinking.

15

What Is She Thinking?

by thankyou in

i'm a non-jw guy.. joined this forum 2 weeks ago to learn about jw.

i enjoy the valuable intelligence, humor, and "community" it provides.. question:.

it appears that a non-jw guy is "off limits" to a jw girl-gal.

thankyou

LisaRose Thank you.

Your explanation really got into the "nitty gritty" of things and is SO HELPFUL !

15

What Is She Thinking?

by thankyou in

i'm a non-jw guy.. joined this forum 2 weeks ago to learn about jw.

i enjoy the valuable intelligence, humor, and "community" it provides.. question:.

it appears that a non-jw guy is "off limits" to a jw girl-gal.

thankyou

clarity thank you.

Wow, the way you described the thinking is downright "scary".

You've certainly been Blessed too have freed yourself from all that.

15

What Is She Thinking?

by thankyou in

i'm a non-jw guy.. joined this forum 2 weeks ago to learn about jw.

i enjoy the valuable intelligence, humor, and "community" it provides.. question:.

it appears that a non-jw guy is "off limits" to a jw girl-gal.

thankyou

Prologos Thank you for your advice.

I failed to mention that she is about 50yrs old so future offspring is not likely an issue.

Thanks again for your "take" on this.

15

What Is She Thinking?

by thankyou in

i'm a non-jw guy.. joined this forum 2 weeks ago to learn about jw.

i enjoy the valuable intelligence, humor, and "community" it provides.. question:.

it appears that a non-jw guy is "off limits" to a jw girl-gal.

thankyou

WireRider Thank you.

I'm real sorry to hear about the lousy experience you had to go through.

Thank you for your valuable advice.

15

What Is She Thinking?

by thankyou in

i'm a non-jw guy.. joined this forum 2 weeks ago to learn about jw.

i enjoy the valuable intelligence, humor, and "community" it provides.. question:.

it appears that a non-jw guy is "off limits" to a jw girl-gal.

thankyou

JWdaughter..Thank you so much.

The insight you have so kindly shared is enabling me to begin to make sense of this whole experience.

I've been astounded at this gal's fortitude to "back away".

I mean in a superficial material sense I've been a trial atty in Calif., and in Hollywood movies, financially sound, and blah blah blah.

Although she doesn't know any of that, she does know that I love God just as much, or possibly more, than she does. And she is as poor as can be.

Geez, JW has an extremely strong "control" over her thought processes.

Thank you again, Sincerely !