joel
I think your'e right I think I've been more stressed over the years than I like to admit, I'm trying to get out of work and still get my bills paid, my jobs is a very stressful
Posts by ttwho
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24need help
by ttwho ini wrote this to randy walters last year and would like your views on it.. .
dear randall.
i have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate.
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24
need help
by ttwho ini wrote this to randy walters last year and would like your views on it.. .
dear randall.
i have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate.
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ttwho
LoveDubs
I must admit I had no idea what Bipolar was or that it is related to depression, I can freely concede to being depressed but, and I ask this in all sincerity, how can this generate such specific experiences? it only has ever happened when I’m asleep, being unable to move, etc, etc what I trying to say is what most people are describing sounds like two steps from a breakdown, like being SO depressed that your life stops or grinds to a slow crawl, all through this I got through college, became a microsoft certified professional, became IT manager of a law firm and now I’m enjoying fatherhood, could someone with the level illness that is being described be capable of such accomplishments -
24
need help
by ttwho ini wrote this to randy walters last year and would like your views on it.. .
dear randall.
i have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate.
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ttwho
Whoa whoa whoa slow down , all these accusations, all I’m saying is this, for the 1st 17 years of my life I never had peep of any ‘demonic’ experiences, then I become a JW then I get all this hassle, then I leave the JW and now they hardly happen , that’s all I’m saying you can’t blame me for thinking that this is more than coincidence
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24
need help
by ttwho ini wrote this to randy walters last year and would like your views on it.. .
dear randall.
i have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate.
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ttwho
Joel
Thanks joel,My life now is a lot better since I left, I have a son who just turn one last Thursday and I’m IT manager of a law firm so my life is very full, I wanted some feed back about my experience because it hasn’t happen for a while but if still bugs me as to why, mommie got the wrong end of the stick, sounds like he/she is carrying a lot of baggage and its being taken out on me like its my fault…..sound's a lot like my girlfriend
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24
need help
by ttwho ini wrote this to randy walters last year and would like your views on it.. .
dear randall.
i have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate.
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ttwho
mommie
What gives you the impression that that this a whinge? Why would someone who is not affiliated with any region or hasn’t spoken to god need to feel important to god? Regardless of how you feel the REAL reason for this post is justified in your very response. I assume that you have in the past or still hold some spiritual awareness, and yet look at how you are responding to me!!! If this is how YOU are responding then how would someone with little to no spiritual awareness react? Shortly after posting this I found another post where lots of people are posting their experiences, not one person there is trying to convince them that they have a brain tumor!!!! After reading their posts it made me realise that I’m not crazy, ill, or in need of a trusted friend watch me while sleep, your hostility toward me is unfounded. If I needed
“someone to validate your theory that associating with JWs led you to demonic attack. If this fantasy comforts you or you need that fantasy to feel important to God,”
then I wouldn’t have left! -
55
Demons / Urban Legends! Which Is It????
by Big Jim inhas anyone on this board ever experienced contact with demons?.
i have heard demons talked about for years, however i have never known anyone that has had any real experiences with them, i have only heard storys.. .
(some quotes).
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ttwho
thought I would give my 2cents, I wrote this to randy walters last year
Dear Randall
I have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate. I suffered with depression for great part if my teenage life and so when I listened to the JWs I embraced it with open arms, in about a year of studying I was baptised. Like so many I had no idea of the life to come, I have so much to say most of which you know or have heard from other JWs. Despite all that has happen there is something that still plagues me even 21/2 year after leaving.
I was raised with a belief in a god, I had a little knowledge of the angels and the demons, and in the year that I started studying I was awoken with the strange sensation that I was being choked! similar to being in a headlock. I chalked this down to a demon attack and my study conductor comforted me with the notion that god would protect me and that all I have to do have call out his name and everything would all right and the demon would not come back. Some time after, I moved house and became a member of the local congregation. It wasn't long before I was attacked in my sleep, the pain is EXCRUCIATING (I use the word 'is' because it still happens). I said nothing to anybody out of fear, I guess I blamed myself, I thought, well, I'm in god's true organisation, so I must be the weak link. So I all but stopped watching TV and stopped listening to music for fear that I was allowing them in somehow. My mother was 7th day Adventist and you may know, they don't believe in images so that ruled her out. Later on I got the chance to go to Florida with a brother who had a fleshly brother out there. I was also attacked in my sleep there. The following year I went back,(having fallen in love with America), this time I stayed with an elder and his family and again I was attacked, while sleeping in his daughters bed. The following year I went back to the states and the same thing happened again at another brother's house. It destroyed my faith in a god who is concerned with us personally. I remember a night when the ordeal was so traumatic that on the way to work to work I cried thinking of the reasons why god would let this happen to someone that supposedly had given is life to him. What was perplexing was that the bible says that 'you won't be tested more than you can bear' that god 'will always make a way out for you', sickness or illness I can understand, temptation from the opposite sex to fornicate, temptation to steal or lie I can understand, but asleep in your bed!!! Where's my way out?? The attacks makes me paralysed and unable to speak to I can't 'call out his name'. Praying franticly hasn't helped or I think it doesn't because nothing happens for a good while, and don't even get me started on the dreams where they introduced themselves to me and synchronised the pain to make me believe that it was real.
For 7 years I truly believed that this was the truth, nothing else would have made a seventeen-year-old give up his education and his life, and this is was what I got. To say that I'm angry is an understatement, however I am no longer bitter about the whole situation, just mega confused. Interestingly enough, after recently finding out about the true date of Jerusalem's destruction, it not being 607BCE, and its implication for the Watchtower society, I have been in contact with the JWs again, to discuss what I have found. They can't see the big picture and even if they could, most of them are far to dependent to leave and now start thinking for themselves. I got a copy of their new book, which discusses Daniel, it’s the only publication from the JWs in my bedroom, and low and behold, another attack and smiling face that fades away. It would bitter irony if all this time that the one thing that I thought would protect me from the demons is the one thing that has given them a free pass to rain on my parade. My obvious question would be, why the HELL is this happening to ME??? I'm far too insignificant to warrant all this attention from the demons. At the height of my 'spirituality' the attacks were every night. The more hours I put in, the more I was punished. When I hit a low and wanted to get back with more studying, the more I was punished. Even when I thought that this was Satan's way of trying to put me off the truth, is still didn't make sense to me. When I finally told an elder one who had been a CO and a DO, even he said that in the 40 or so years that he had been in the truth he had never heard of this, especially in a 1st world country.
As it stands, I still have a belief in god, but with this still going on, what I'm to think? Is this to be my penance for 7 years of trying to serve god the best way I could? I have become disillusioned with the whole concept of god and religion. The sheer ambiguity of if all is just too much for me to bear, thinking that god has answered your prayer only for it to blow up in your face, its just happened with too much constancy to be coincidence. I haven't spoken to god in sooo long I can't remember, and yet in the 21/2 years since I left, I have lived my life as if god doesn't care about me, but my quality of life has increase a thousand fold. Mentally, I have so much clarity that you would think that god and myself are inseparable. I do feel closer to him now that I'm not affiliated with a religion and don't expect ANTHING from him. Would this be the definition of a paradox??
Tell me…. what do you think.
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24
need help
by ttwho ini wrote this to randy walters last year and would like your views on it.. .
dear randall.
i have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate.
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-
ttwho
mommie
you need to take the experience as a whole, the choking only happen once! how would a doctor diagnose the bouts of pain? and what I never mentioned is the time I had my covers stripped off me only to be confronted by a humanoid image with no features!!!!, if you were a doctor you would have had me committed!, your reply is typical of someone who has never experienced this sort of thing 1st or 3rd hand. If you had you would sing a different tune
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24
need help
by ttwho ini wrote this to randy walters last year and would like your views on it.. .
dear randall.
i have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate.
-
-
ttwho
I wrote this to randy walters last year and would like your views on it.
Dear Randall
I have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate. I suffered with depression for great part if my teenage life and so when I listened to the JWs I embraced it with open arms, in about a year of studying I was baptised. Like so many I had no idea of the life to come, I have so much to say most of which you know or have heard from other JWs. Despite all that has happen there is something that still plagues me even 21/2 year after leaving.
I was raised with a belief in a god, I had a little knowledge of the angels and the demons, and in the year that I started studying I was awoken with the strange sensation that I was being choked! similar to being in a headlock. I chalked this down to a demon attack and my study conductor comforted me with the notion that god would protect me and that all I have to do have call out his name and everything would all right and the demon would not come back. Some time after, I moved house and became a member of the local congregation. It wasn't long before I was attacked in my sleep, the pain is EXCRUCIATING (I use the word 'is' because it still happens). I said nothing to anybody out of fear, I guess I blamed myself, I thought, well, I'm in god's true organisation, so I must be the weak link. So I all but stopped watching TV and stopped listening to music for fear that I was allowing them in somehow. My mother was 7th day Adventist and you may know, they don't believe in images so that ruled her out. Later on I got the chance to go to Florida with a brother who had a fleshly brother out there. I was also attacked in my sleep there. The following year I went back,(having fallen in love with America), this time I stayed with an elder and his family and again I was attacked, while sleeping in his daughters bed. The following year I went back to the states and the same thing happened again at another brother's house. It destroyed my faith in a god who is concerned with us personally. I remember a night when the ordeal was so traumatic that on the way to work to work I cried thinking of the reasons why god would let this happen to someone that supposedly had given is life to him. What was perplexing was that the bible says that 'you won't be tested more than you can bear' that god 'will always make a way out for you', sickness or illness I can understand, temptation from the opposite sex to fornicate, temptation to steal or lie I can understand, but asleep in your bed!!! Where's my way out?? The attacks makes me paralysed and unable to speak to I can't 'call out his name'. Praying franticly hasn't helped or I think it doesn't because nothing happens for a good while, and don't even get me started on the dreams where they introduced themselves to me and synchronised the pain to make me believe that it was real.
For 7 years I truly believed that this was the truth, nothing else would have made a seventeen-year-old give up his education and his life, and this is was what I got. To say that I'm angry is an understatement, however I am no longer bitter about the whole situation, just mega confused. Interestingly enough, after recently finding out about the true date of Jerusalem's destruction, it not being 607BCE, and its implication for the Watchtower society, I have been in contact with the JWs again, to discuss what I have found. They can't see the big picture and even if they could, most of them are far to dependent to leave and now start thinking for themselves. I got a copy of their new book, which discusses Daniel, it’s the only publication from the JWs in my bedroom, and low and behold, another attack and smiling face that fades away. It would bitter irony if all this time that the one thing that I thought would protect me from the demons is the one thing that has given them a free pass to rain on my parade. My obvious question would be, why the HELL is this happening to ME??? I'm far too insignificant to warrant all this attention from the demons. At the height of my 'spirituality' the attacks were every night. The more hours I put in, the more I was punished. When I hit a low and wanted to get back with more studying, the more I was punished. Even when I thought that this was Satan's way of trying to put me off the truth, is still didn't make sense to me. When I finally told an elder one who had been a CO and a DO, even he said that in the 40 or so years that he had been in the truth he had never heard of this, especially in a 1st world country.
As it stands, I still have a belief in god, but with this still going on, what I'm to think? Is this to be my penance for 7 years of trying to serve god the best way I could? I have become disillusioned with the whole concept of god and religion. The sheer ambiguity of if all is just too much for me to bear, thinking that god has answered your prayer only for it to blow up in your face, its just happened with too much constancy to be coincidence. I haven't spoken to god in sooo long I can't remember, and yet in the 21/2 years since I left, I have lived my life as if god doesn't care about me, but my quality of life has increase a thousand fold. Mentally, I have so much clarity that you would think that god and myself are inseparable. I do feel closer to him now that I'm not affiliated with a religion and don't expect ANTHING from him. Would this be the definition of a paradox??
Tell me…. what do you think.
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4
Demons,ghosts,& wierd happenings
by Liberty ini love this subject.
i just wanted to point out that i am not a complete skeptic about these things i just think that there are many possible explainations besides the standard jw "it was demons" response.
firstly, i'd like to reinterate that i respect the reality of your experiances in the realm of the para-normal so i'm not arguing that you are all lying or that you're crazy, i am merely questioning the cause of the event.
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ttwho
thought I'd give my 2 cents, I wrote this to randy walters last year
Dear Randall
I have a lot to say but won't bore with the details, a brief introduction would be appropriate. I suffered with depression for great part if my teenage life and so when I listened to the JWs I embraced it with open arms, in about a year of studying I was baptised. Like so many I had no idea of the life to come, I have so much to say most of which you know or have heard from other JWs. Despite all that has happen there is something that still plagues me even 21/2 year after leaving.
I was raised with a belief in a god, I had a little knowledge of the angels and the demons, and in the year that I started studying I was awoken with the strange sensation that I was being choked! similar to being in a headlock. I chalked this down to a demon attack and my study conductor comforted me with the notion that god would protect me and that all I have to do have call out his name and everything would all right and the demon would not come back. Some time after, I moved house and became a member of the local congregation. It wasn't long before I was attacked in my sleep, the pain is EXCRUCIATING (I use the word 'is' because it still happens). I said nothing to anybody out of fear, I guess I blamed myself, I thought, well, I'm in god's true organisation, so I must be the weak link. So I all but stopped watching TV and stopped listening to music for fear that I was allowing them in somehow. My mother was 7th day Adventist and you may know, they don't believe in images so that ruled her out. Later on I got the chance to go to Florida with a brother who had a fleshly brother out there. I was also attacked in my sleep there. The following year I went back,(having fallen in love with America), this time I stayed with an elder and his family and again I was attacked, while sleeping in his daughters bed. The following year I went back to the states and the same thing happened again at another brother's house. It destroyed my faith in a god who is concerned with us personally. I remember a night when the ordeal was so traumatic that on the way to work to work I cried thinking of the reasons why god would let this happen to someone that supposedly had given is life to him. What was perplexing was that the bible says that 'you won't be tested more than you can bear' that god 'will always make a way out for you', sickness or illness I can understand, temptation from the opposite sex to fornicate, temptation to steal or lie I can understand, but asleep in your bed!!! Where's my way out?? The attacks makes me paralysed and unable to speak to I can't 'call out his name'. Praying franticly hasn't helped or I think it doesn't because nothing happens for a good while, and don't even get me started on the dreams where they introduced themselves to me and synchronised the pain to make me believe that it was real.
For 7 years I truly believed that this was the truth, nothing else would have made a seventeen-year-old give up his education and his life, and this is was what I got. To say that I'm angry is an understatement, however I am no longer bitter about the whole situation, just mega confused. Interestingly enough, after recently finding out about the true date of Jerusalem's destruction, it not being 607BCE, and its implication for the Watchtower society, I have been in contact with the JWs again, to discuss what I have found. They can't see the big picture and even if they could, most of them are far to dependent to leave and now start thinking for themselves. I got a copy of their new book, which discusses Daniel, it’s the only publication from the JWs in my bedroom, and low and behold, another attack and smiling face that fades away. It would bitter irony if all this time that the one thing that I thought would protect me from the demons is the one thing that has given them a free pass to rain on my parade. My obvious question would be, why the HELL is this happening to ME??? I'm far too insignificant to warrant all this attention from the demons. At the height of my 'spirituality' the attacks were every night. The more hours I put in, the more I was punished. When I hit a low and wanted to get back with more studying, the more I was punished. Even when I thought that this was Satan's way of trying to put me off the truth, is still didn't make sense to me. When I finally told an elder one who had been a CO and a DO, even he said that in the 40 or so years that he had been in the truth he had never heard of this, especially in a 1st world country.
As it stands, I still have a belief in god, but with this still going on, what I'm to think? Is this to be my penance for 7 years of trying to serve god the best way I could? I have become disillusioned with the whole concept of god and religion. The sheer ambiguity of if all is just too much for me to bear, thinking that god has answered your prayer only for it to blow up in your face, its just happened with too much constancy to be coincidence. I haven't spoken to god in sooo long I can't remember, and yet in the 21/2 years since I left, I have lived my life as if god doesn't care about me, but my quality of life has increase a thousand fold. Mentally, I have so much clarity that you would think that god and myself are inseparable. I do feel closer to him now that I'm not affiliated with a religion and don't expect ANTHING from him. Would this be the definition of a paradox??
Tell me…. what do you think.
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42
WB&TS of Pennsylvania financial figures
by expatbrit ina few financial figures that happen to have fallen into my sweaty palms.
while only a small piece of the wt's financial jigsaw puzzle, they effectively illustrate the level of $ under the society's control.
watchtower bible and tract society of pennsylvania.
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ttwho
I'm in the middle of contructing my own x-jw site and would love to but this on it, please e-mail to me at [email protected]
thanks