10 Questions to annoy Jehovah's Witnesses

by TerryWalstrom in

we are sick with sin and we’re trying to get well, right?

2. when you hire a coach to get you to the playoffs and win the big game, yet you lose...lose...lose.... do you fire him, or, do you keep him on?

well, then, how do you explain fred franz being made president after the 1975 fiasco?.

TerryWalstrom

Had I been asked the questions, I too would have had a go. I'd have been proud of my reply, too.
If no other point can be raised here, I hope it is this: NOBODY asks important questions when they study with JW's because you have to KNOW deeply the history of the Watchtower to see it's patchwork continuum of Ad Libs.
In my book, I Wept by the Rivers of Babylon, I raised this issue. I studied "the Bible" with my best friend who was a freshly minted JW. I didn't know I was going to be indoctrinated. I didn't know I wasn't really even studying "the Bible". I raised common sense objections not knowing the smooth responses had been honed and perfected over the decades.
I had my own version of Annoying--but--not so annoying they couldn't be given answers.

What makes it easy and possible for J-Dubs to refute objections is the fact there is no REALITY to match.

Let's take a Logical and Rational look at something simple:
_________
A wheel is round. It pretty much has to be. There is no Chinese wheel, Russian wheel, American wheel when it comes to roundness and utility.
There is no Arabian Physics or Iranian Physics, or North Korean Physics because atoms and molecules and quarks and such perfectly accord with the reality of how things operate in our Universe. F always = M A (Force is equal to mass times acceleration) and E is always = to MC2 (energy in ergs is always equal to mass times the speed of light squared.)
There are no national variations or versions of Math, Science, Astronomy, Engineering, etc. for very good reasons.
All of these branches of knowledge correspond perfectly and demonstrably with provable useful and operational instances.
What about RELIGION?
This is my whole point! In Christianity alone, there are about 40 thousand versions, interpretations, variations asserted to be TRUTH itself, at odds with the other opinions.
SEE THE DIFFERENCE?
Science, Math, Geometry, Engineering, etc are based on Axioms, Principles, Operations which conform to reality in a way which DOESN't COMPORT with national or sectarian "opinions" in a contradictory way that Religion invites.
Shouldn't this be a CLUE?
Christians, Jews, Muslims have their own way of counting time--did you know that? Do you know what year it is, for example, for a Jew right now? It is 5775.
For a Muslim? It is 1438.

Baptists and Jehovah's Witnesses can look at Bible Chronology and come up with totally different worlds of belief and prediction based on the same Scriptures.
Now you know how all the clever JW ANSWERS are created and effective.

They are based on the world which does not, in fact, exist except in one's mind.

16

10 Questions to annoy Jehovah's Witnesses

by TerryWalstrom in

we are sick with sin and we’re trying to get well, right?

2. when you hire a coach to get you to the playoffs and win the big game, yet you lose...lose...lose.... do you fire him, or, do you keep him on?

well, then, how do you explain fred franz being made president after the 1975 fiasco?.

TerryWalstrom

In all honesty, the JW's who have arrived at my door in the last 5 years have all been so pathetically clueless, young, innocent, and Bambi-like, I haven't had the heart to gut them. I do explain to them, "I used to be exactly like you, doing what you do now. I was a Pioneer, I went to prison for my faith, and I discharged many responsibilities in my congregation."
At that point, IF they want to know more, they'll ask. If they don't (almost always) I say nothing more.
If they do ask, I keep it short and unemotional.
They beat a hasty retreat.
I had one lady walk over to me at Starbucks and hand me an invitation to the Memorial and I responded (as stated above) and she sat down and questioned me.
I answered her many questions in quite a lot of detail.

She was a Newbie and very zealous. Probably from China. She listened and sat there a few silent seconds after processing my responses. Then, she said, "So, you can still come back to the Kingdom Hall. It's not too late."

So, I gave up on rational discourse. I answered her by saying, "IT'S A RELIGIOUS CULT. Why would I ever want to get trapped inside a CULT?"
At that moment her eyes changed color. She couldn't get away fast enough!

None of my reasonable explanations, data, details, etc. made the slightest dent in her head. The final statement about it being a CULT is the only thing which penetrated.
Strange, huh?

Illustrating an important point: You Had To Have Been There

by TerryWalstrom in

she is of the anointed.. sister richardson, this is my daughter, jenny.. sr: "hello, jenny.".

mom: jenny, sister richardson is 117 years old.

sr: "how old are you, jenny?".

TerryWalstrom

(It is the evening at the Kingdom Hall and a JW mom and her JW daughter arrive before the meeting for fellowship.)

MOM: Jenny, come over here and meet Sister Richardson. She is of the anointed.

Sister Richardson, this is my daughter, Jenny.

SR: "Hello, Jenny."

JENNY: "Hello, Sister Richardson."

MOM: Jenny, Sister Richardson is 117 years old. She was born in 1900 when Pastor Russell was still alive!

SR: "How old are you, Jenny?"

JENNY: "I'm seventeen."

MOM: Jenny, is there anything you'd like to ask Sister Richardson?

JENNY: "Sure. My mom says not to worry about preparing for college because Armageddon is coming soon. But, the other girls at school make fun of me because they say I'll end up married to a janitor and poor if I stay a Jehovah's Witness. What do I tell them?"

SR: "Well, Jenny. I was fourteen years old in 1914 when Armageddon came and I was 25 when the ancient worthies returned from the dead and took up residence in Beth Sarim in San Diego. Exciting times!

I was 75 when the 1000 year reign began. If you just wait on Jehovah like I have you'll be just like me someday. I never went to college. I married a janitor and I've never been anywhere or done anything exciting. I've never worked outside the home because I was raising the kids. My husband died and I have no money to live on. My kids are disfellowshipped and they send me money, though. I don't even thank them because they are Apostates and I don't have anything to do with mentally diseased people!"

MOM: Um, uh--let's go now Jenny, the meeting is about to begin and leave Sister Richardson alone--we know she's been on medication and is probably tired and easily confused.

SR: "Bye Jenny. Stay faithful. Wait on Jehovah. I know I sure have."

3

Sometimes it is better to Not ask! (A cautionary tale)

by TerryWalstrom in

she is of the anointed.. sister richardson, this is my daughter, jenny.. sr: "hello, jenny.".

mom: jenny, sister richardson is 117 years old.

sr: "how old are you, jenny?".

TerryWalstrom

(It is the evening at the Kingdom Hall and a JW mom and her JW daughter arrive before the meeting for fellowship.)

MOM: Jenny, come over here and meet Sister Richardson. She is of the anointed.

Sister Richardson, this is my daughter, Jenny.

SR: "Hello, Jenny."

JENNY: "Hello, Sister Richardson."

MOM: Jenny, Sister Richardson is 117 years old. She was born in 1900 when Pastor Russell was still alive!

SR: "How old are you, Jenny?"

JENNY: "I'm seventeen."

MOM: Jenny, is there anything you'd like to ask Sister Richardson?

JENNY: "Sure. My mom says not to worry about preparing for college because Armageddon is coming soon. But, the other girls at school make fun of me because they say I'll end up married to a janitor and poor if I stay a Jehovah's Witness. What do I tell them?"

SR: "Well, Jenny. I was fourteen years old in 1914 when Armageddon came and I was 25 when the ancient worthies returned from the dead and took up residence in Beth Sarim in San Diego. Exciting times!

I was 75 when the 1000 year reign began. If you just wait on Jehovah like I have you'll be just like me someday. I never went to college. I married a janitor and I've never been anywhere or done anything exciting. I've never worked outside the home because I was raising the kids. My husband died and I have no money to live on. My kids are disfellowshipped and they send me money, though. I don't even thank them because they are Apostates and I don't have anything to do with mentally diseased people!"

MOM: Um, uh--let's go now Jenny, the meeting is about to begin and leave Sister Richardson alone--we know she's been on medication and is probably tired and easily confused.

SR: "Bye Jenny. Stay faithful. Wait on Jehovah. I know I sure have."

5

A Kind of Invasion of the Body Snatchers (stealing Christianity)

by TerryWalstrom in

jehovah's witnesses took mainstream christianity and replaced each part of it, one item, one term, one definition at a time, into its contrary.. holy spirit (capital letters) became a tholy spirit (lower case letters) = from a person into a mere forceful gesture.. cross became torture stake.

(eradication of the essential symbol of historical christianity).

soul went from ethereal spirit to a mere hunk of flesh and bone.. salvation by grace became earning your salvation one door-knock at a time.

TerryWalstrom

Jehovah's Witnesses took mainstream Christianity and replaced each part of it, one item, one term, one definition at a time, into its contrary.

Holy Spirit (capital letters) became a tholy spirit (lower case letters) = from a person into a mere forceful gesture.

Cross became torture stake. (Eradication of the essential symbol of historical Christianity)

Soul went from ethereal spirit to a mere hunk of flesh and bone.

Salvation by Grace became earning your salvation one door-knock at a time.

Jesus went from Divine equality with God to a kind of volunteer fireman caught in a burning building on Earth. He's a Hero but he's not God. (He is a....god.)

Communion went from a daily celebration of Jesus allowing humanity back into divine favor, replaced with a way too boring audience non-participation.

Pontius Pilate asked Jesus "What is truth?" and Jesus was silent, but you can't shut JW's. These folks manufacture THE Truth as their brand logo. Sole ownership!

It is as though two thousand years of Christian worship was a farting contest until the Pyramid charts and invisible Jesus rants were published by Charles Taze Russell.

Conscientious Objectors were transformed into people acting on orders from the GB (bypassing the internal conscience) and ending up with only the Objector portion.
Instead of availing the JW draft age member to Alternate Service to the Community during wartime---the GB pushed young men into wasting their time completely languishing in a local prison as token billboard martyrs for recruitment purposes.

Christians aren't what JW's are--they pretend to become more important than that: as Jehovah's Witnesses. They renounced the cross in 1930 and removed Jesus from their worship entirely by 1953.

Once upon a time, the Watchtower Society was NOT a RELIGION--because "RELIGION IS A SNARE AND A RACKET." But, when they were refused tax-free status unless they could prove themselves to be a religion, guess what happened?
Suddenly, the were the TRUE religion.

The Watchtower Society supports no CHURCH only (at first) ecclesia and (later) Kingdom Halls.

The work of C.T.Russell, J.F.Rutherford, Knorr, Franz, and all the rest has been a steady REPLACEMENT of Christianity with a simulacrum...a stand-in...an alternate decoy...a kind of Trojan Horse.

Rather than a shining light of truth it is a shadow government with insidious policies devoted to holding families hostage to passing whims, adjustments, fear-mongering and a rat wheel of endless repetitious motions which produces nothing tangible but exhaustion and depression.

16

10 Questions to annoy Jehovah's Witnesses

by TerryWalstrom in

we are sick with sin and we’re trying to get well, right?

2. when you hire a coach to get you to the playoffs and win the big game, yet you lose...lose...lose.... do you fire him, or, do you keep him on?

well, then, how do you explain fred franz being made president after the 1975 fiasco?.

TerryWalstrom

1. Why wouldn’t Christians think of their congregation as a kind of hospital? We are sick with sin and we’re trying to get well, right? What hospital kicks the sick ones out the door and keeps the healthy ones?

2. When you hire a coach to get you to the playoffs and win the big game, yet you lose...lose...lose.... do you FIRE him, or, do you keep him on? Well, then, how do you explain Fred Franz being made PRESIDENT after the 1975 fiasco?

3. Knowledge about life, medicine, science, astronomy, mathematics, physics, chemistry & history is greater and more abundant today than ever before. If you ignore higher education now--who is going to be the most clueless jackass in the room in the years to come?

4. In a dark room, you light a candle. If it is still too dark to see clearly—do you light a new candle and blow out the old one? Then, try again. Explain this New Light crap once more.

5. Humility consists of open willingness to admit mistakes and explain your failures with a promise NEVER to do it again. Arrogance, on the other hand, says this:

"At times explanations given by Jehovah’s visible organization have shown adjustments, seemingly to previous points of view. But this has not actually been the case."

6. A Faithful Servant does not tell guests what they should eat. A Wise Servant would not dare cry, “Dinner is being served” while the guests just sit and wait and wait--unless he needed to have his crazy ass fired!

7. Peter denied Christ 3 separate times out of self-regard in the face of danger. Afterward, Jesus gave him the keys to the Kingdom Tell me again how any disfellowshipped person is WORSE?

8. Willingness to die for a belief seems to be the delight of terrorists and every other radical fanatic. Why do Christians find it heroic too?

9. Okay, you're telling me what "this generation" REALLY MEANS now.....so....um...what the hell was all that other crap YOU SAID IT MEANT?

10. My mother suffered the pangs of birth so I could have a life. She fed me, changed my diapers, held me, dried my tears, taught me right from wrong and was always there for me. What kind of low-life ingrate will it make me IF I turn my back on her now because she won't quit smoking….and you just DISFELLOWSHIPPED HER!!

Interior Governing Body: We now take you to the "DUH" room...

by TerryWalstrom in

imagine a large open field filled with old dudes wearing headphones attached to metal detectors searching for.

anything of value in the middle of nowhere .

imagine these old dudes are the governing body of jehovah's witnesses .

TerryWalstrom

Imagine a large open field filled with old dudes wearing headphones attached to metal detectors searching for

anything of value in the middle of nowhere . . . Imagine these old dudes are THE GOVERNING BODY of Jehovah's Witnesses . . .

One them gets a "bloop" or "bleep" signal

and an alarm cry goes up!

"HERE IT IS! HERE IT IS! NEW LIGHT! NEW LIGHT!"

A phone call is placed to Bethel Headquarters the Duh! Department gets writers going crafting a TRUTH for immediate release!

Bulletin: 1878 is the rapture! Bulletin: 1925 is the resurrection!

Bulletin: 1914 is Armageddon! Bulletin: Romans 13 is the opposite to what it says

Bulletin: 1975 is the End of 6,000 years of human existence!

But wait!

Stop the presses!

The old dude in the bermuda shorts wearing black socks with dress shoes has bent over and dug up something and examined it . . .

Ulp! Turns out, what it really has been discovered is trash, junk---oops! We mean OLD LIGHT!

HEY--WHAT'S GOING ON?

"Jehovah is the Grand identifier of his true messengers. He identifies them by making the messages he delivers through them come true. Jehovah is also the Great Exposer of false messengers." Watchtower 1997 May 1 p.8

3

You Can't Say Gypsy (say: Cearzarnearzy)

by TerryWalstrom in

jw
friends

"you can't say "gypsy.

"say cearzarnearzy.___i had just finished watching nightmare alley, a noir thriller about carnivals, mind-reading acts, and petty larceny.

the freeze frame of the carnival was on my laptop when_ he_ sat down.not really paying attention to the man, per se, i did sort of notice his interest.. he snorted knowingly.

TerryWalstrom

Gypsy is a term derived from the wrong notion (that the original family came out of Egypt.)
Those who have had dealings with them instantly know when they are in the company of (not) "gypsy" persons. The PC police claim Romani is correct.
I don't believe it for an instant. I think this works:

Cearzarnearzy

3

You Can't Say Gypsy (say: Cearzarnearzy)

by TerryWalstrom in

jw
friends

"you can't say "gypsy.

"say cearzarnearzy.___i had just finished watching nightmare alley, a noir thriller about carnivals, mind-reading acts, and petty larceny.

the freeze frame of the carnival was on my laptop when_ he_ sat down.not really paying attention to the man, per se, i did sort of notice his interest.. he snorted knowingly.

TerryWalstrom

Orry-say Imon-say!

I didn't realize the Capital thingy was bad form. Thanks for the heads up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFOrL72yoFQ

3

You Can't Say Gypsy (say: Cearzarnearzy)

by TerryWalstrom in

jw
friends

"you can't say "gypsy.

"say cearzarnearzy.___i had just finished watching nightmare alley, a noir thriller about carnivals, mind-reading acts, and petty larceny.

the freeze frame of the carnival was on my laptop when_ he_ sat down.not really paying attention to the man, per se, i did sort of notice his interest.. he snorted knowingly.

TerryWalstrom

"You can't say "Gypsy."
Say Cearzarnearzy.
___
I had just finished watching NIGHTMARE ALLEY, a noir thriller about carnivals, mind-reading acts, and petty larceny. The freeze frame of the carnival was on my laptop when_ he_ sat down.
Not really paying attention to the man, per se, I did sort of notice his interest.

He snorted knowingly. (My guess).
He lifted a craggy finger. Pointing at the laptop screen he cocked his head at me.
I sussed he was communicating.
I lifted my eyebrows at him and he spoke at last.

"Cearzan yearzou spearzeak Cearzarnearzy?"

__Let me halt here for a second._

Don't ask me how I picked up on a clue to what the old man spoke, but I DID.
I have 'an ear' for language and music.

My mom taught me Pig-latin when I was a small child, too.
I was about 5 when she taught me to say, "Oo-day oo-yay eek-spay ig-pay atin-lay?"

The idea is to disguise what you are saying, making it possible to communicate with a confederate without bystanders knowing your message.

My mother had worked in a traveling carnival for six months. She told me about it and I was fascinated. I pumped every detail as a child.
Why? I have no idea.
Maybe even that long ago I was gathering details for my imaginary writing career :)

Having said all that, I really mean to tell you this: I heard a kind of CODE when the old fella said to me:

"Cear-zan year-zou spear-zeak Cearz-arn-earzy?"

Mind you, I could not break the code or understand how it worked...not yet.
I had realized there was something to be discovered...some code to break!
Instantly fascinated, I nodded without even trying to respond in kind.
________________

As an afterthought, I simply added a couple of words, "...My mother."
The old guy tilted his head a bit and the slightly sneery expression which permanently adorned his sour puss departed like a shadow when the sun breaks through.
______

The odd old fellow made an appraisal like a jeweler looking at a ring in a Pawn Shop.
An almost imperceptibly subtle nod and slow closing of his eyes followed my two words.
At that very moment, I had my EPIPHANY!
This was the old "Gypsy" man who had wagged his cane at me and had admonished me for sitting at a handicap table, not more than a week ago!

He wasn't wearing that telltale hat with the silver band or carrying the cane with the silver handle. The gestalt had been changed. Today he was just "a guy."

This flipped me out!
For a brief second, anyway. Or two.

Were the two of us (both old men with white hair) playing some kind of unspoken game with each other?
If so...it was unsettling.

I was at a clear disadvantage.
I didn't know the rules.
I might be a target of some payback.
I had, after all, more or less rebuffed his admonishment.
______

What I did do was write down what I'd heard pho-net-i-cally. This is a habit I developed after taking a Dale Carnegie course (How to Win Friends and Influence People) way back in 1970 as an employee of the employment agency where I worked. When a person says something you don't fully understand, (such as a foreign name) IF YOU WRITE IT DOWN pho-net-i-cally,
you can examine it objectively.

Anyway, I digress...

I typed the cryptic phrase and started a search. Trying the variations on spelling, I hit the jackpot!
"Gypsies", Carnival people, and jazz musicians used secret language codes to privatize communication in front of strangers.

First, the word is broken up into syllables and dummy phrases are inserted between the syllables. Once you practice and get the hang of it, you can speak and understand easily.

My mom had shown me.
PIG = just the end of the word detached from the first letter IG and the reattached first letter with an "ay" or "day" sound.
PIG= IG-Pay.
"Do you speak Pig Latin"=
"Oo-day oo-yay eek-spay IG-pay atin-Lay?"
______
What had my "Gypsy" companion spoken, then?
I still didn't know. I waited until he departed and spent awhile ferreting out clues.
EXAMPLE:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=28&v=CjBJsL7Mbik
________

Jazz musicians, like Carny workers, had what they called a Ghetto code. (Mind you, this was in Pre-Civil Rights era).

Snoop Dog has used the code:
“Hey, bree-iz-other mee-iz-an, how you fee-iz-eel?”

“Is everything all-ree-iz-all-right? Well, why don’t you, uh, why don’t you tell me about this pee-iz-arty to-nee-iz-ight? You goin’? Wee-iz-ell, why don’t you bring me a nee-iz-ickel bee-iz-ag?’

“Yeah, and why don’t you bring some bee-iz-am-bee-iz-oo so I can ree-iz-oll those up. I appreciate it.”
__________________

TerryWalstrom

Posts by TerryWalstrom

Cearzarnearzy