sadiejive: I think you are doing the right thing studying the Bible. I understand your doubts and worries also. I am still a Witness and have grown up as one. I grew up as a Witness in a country that persecuted us for our beliefs. It was tough, but at the same time I had the priviledge of relying completely on Jehovah when the going got tough.
As far as baptism, no one can make you do it or not do it. It has to come from your heart.
It is excellent that you are investigating, it is always good to make an educated choice. This board is full of characters. Unfortunately some don't believe in a God, some don't believe in the Bible. Always investigate things you hear and read with your own bible and come to your own conclusions.