AndDontCallMeShirley

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Posts by AndDontCallMeShirley

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  21

  If "The Feast" of the RC is so vitally important for every JW to consume.........

  by Darth Fader The Sequel in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  ....... then why wouldn't the wtbt$ easily make the entire program, complete with rockstar gb's, cheesy dramas, etc, available on youtube or some other free or almost free web streaming service?

  obviously it is a huge burden for a majority of the "friends" to attend a regional convention and many either cannot go or it takes all of our their funds (or borrowed funds) to be able to make it.

  how about all the "friends" that are morbidly obese, infirm, have extreme health conditions, have unbelieving mates, or have mental issues which prevent them from attending a convention?

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  Why not just announce the link from stage?

  .

  It wouldn't do any good because you still need to know the secret handshake and have a decoder ring.
• 
  38

  Paul - GB Member (W 9/15/14)

  by pixel in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  ok, is this a "new understanding" or what?

  up until this point i thought that the borg refered paul as a co or do, but never gb member:.

  p. 12 now, why would paul a spiritual giant who likely was a member of the first-century governing bodycall himself a miserable man?.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  But Paul didn't have the savvy to invent a "domestics" class to do all his work for him while he lounged in his ivory tower.
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  21

  If "The Feast" of the RC is so vitally important for every JW to consume.........

  by Darth Fader The Sequel in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  ....... then why wouldn't the wtbt$ easily make the entire program, complete with rockstar gb's, cheesy dramas, etc, available on youtube or some other free or almost free web streaming service?

  obviously it is a huge burden for a majority of the "friends" to attend a regional convention and many either cannot go or it takes all of our their funds (or borrowed funds) to be able to make it.

  how about all the "friends" that are morbidly obese, infirm, have extreme health conditions, have unbelieving mates, or have mental issues which prevent them from attending a convention?

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  @ DFTS: why wouldn't the WTBT$ easily make the entire program, complete with rockstar GB's, cheesy dramas, etc, available on YouTube or some other free or almost free web streaming service?

  .

  For the same reason the GB didn't take out full page ads in every major newspaper worldwide, billboards and every tv and cable network announcing to the world that the Governing Body is the faithful slave that Jesus pointed to and they, and they alone, are God's channel for salvation.

  It seems news that important should've been publicized in more than just the Study Edition of the WT, and mentioned only once at that.

  WT historically likes to keep the really juicy stuff on the low low.
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  47

  BOE 2014-07-13 Appointment and deletion of elders and ministerial servants

  by WatchTower87 in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  2014-07-13 appointment and deletion of elders and ministerial servantsto all bodies of elders.

  the link removed by request is also available at the forms link.

  the congregation secretary should arrange for this letter to be retained in the congregation permanent file of policy letters.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  hey, GMJALMT:

  1. epic off-topic post fail. Congratulations!

  2. If after 50 years of reading about DNA you still haven't figured it out, why not just walk away? Maybe tackle a simpler question like, "why is the sky blue?"

  3. I believe your question was answered on "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?"

  ...

  @ DD: Jesus the Christ is my mediator

  I love you, man, but you don't really think a JW elder will buy that answer, do you? I mean, really! Every JW knows the governing body is their Mediator, not Jesus.
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  36

  Women elders, what difference would they make?

  by Freedom77 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  okay, let's do a big what-if: suppose the gb for its own unfathomable reasons suddenly got new light (tm) and decided to start appointing women elders and ministerial servants.

  they would, of course, refer to the examples of junia (apostle), and priscilla and phoebe (deaconesses in wordlyspeak) in the greek scriptures; never mind what mental somersaults it would take to get them there.

  stranger things have happened in wt history.. that being the case, would having women in positions of real authority make any significant difference in the congos or in the borg as a whole, and why or why not?.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  @ Freedom77: No oral sex ---> back and forth and back and forth

  .

  LOL. That's punny! (same for anal sex, by the way).

  .

  If women were appointed as elders, there would be a lot of judicial action taking place

  "Hell hath no scorn like a woman's fury"

  Imagine a JC being formed by Elderette Marge because Sister Looks-So-Fine-in-Fishnet-Stockings and a tight skirt makes Elderette Marge look even worse than the frumpy, 80# overweight matron she already is.

  .

  I've been in situations where I've worked for women in positions of power and influence. At that level, there is no difference between the sexes and the only thing that prevails is human nature and lust for more power and demolishing anyone who gets in the way.

  Women as elders = same s**t, different day.
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  41

  The Memorial- Passing the emblems, a prime display of weirdness

  by Darth Fader The Sequel in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  not sure if this bothered other people, but it absolutely drove me crazy!!!!.

  ok, typical annual memorial.

  the emblems are being passed around.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  the very same brothers that spent the last 10 minutes passing out the emblems to a few hundred people must then go sit down in their reserved chairs in the front row of the hall and some other brother stands up and offers THEM the emblems to clutch and hold and fondle for absolutely no reason

  Too funny! This was always the part that drove me crazy as well. The "Professional Passers" have already handled the plate and glass countless times...but it didn't count. Apparently, Jesus is a bear for detail and will not be happy if these brothers simply set the plate and glass down and walk away.

  Ironically, Jesus is the one who condemned the Pharisees for arguing minutiae, like how far up the arm one should wash to be clean: to the elbow? above the elbow? The JW Memorial rules are no different.

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  As much as JWs like to think they are free of religious traditions and nonsensical rituals of "Babylon"/Christendom, the truth is they are as mired down in tradition, empty ritual and childish superstition (Think Sparlock) as much as the next person.
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  47

  BOE 2014-07-13 Appointment and deletion of elders and ministerial servants

  by WatchTower87 in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  2014-07-13 appointment and deletion of elders and ministerial servantsto all bodies of elders.

  the link removed by request is also available at the forms link.

  the congregation secretary should arrange for this letter to be retained in the congregation permanent file of policy letters.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  Dagney,

  They may be referring to the BOE letter dated 4-22-14, Re: the circuit overseer is now responsible for appointing/deleting brothers.
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  47

  BOE 2014-07-13 Appointment and deletion of elders and ministerial servants

  by WatchTower87 in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  2014-07-13 appointment and deletion of elders and ministerial servantsto all bodies of elders.

  the link removed by request is also available at the forms link.

  the congregation secretary should arrange for this letter to be retained in the congregation permanent file of policy letters.

  1. 
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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  @ nswtg: how does the process work?

  .

  In reality, here's how the process works:

  1. holy spirit is not involved because it doesn't exist

  2. Jehovah is not involved because he doesn't exist

  3. Dumbass elders recommend other dumbasses to be elders

  4. The dumbass elder body passes this recommendation on to the next higher-up dumbass: the Circuit Overseer

  5. The CO passes his recommendation on up to the highest level of Dumbasses: the Governing Body. They use their big rubber "Approved by Holy Spirit" stamp to greenlight the appointment. After they rubberstamp a stack of approvals of men they have never met, and never will, they break for a donut snack before their late morning nappie time.

  6. Now the newly-appointed Dumbass* is added to the ranks and receives immediate tenure and a thick coating of Teflon (children beware!)

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  Note capital "D", which goes with the new title

  ...

  jgnat: One of my leaders remarked how surprising it was to see how many volunteers evaporate once they hear about the check, never to be seen again.

  Sure, but WT is already hurting for "qualified" brothers to reach out. Background checks would unravel the entire WT system overnight.

  Background checks make sense in Satan's Wicked System of Things™, but are unreasonable in God's Organization™
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  47

  convinced 95% of all active jw's don't have a clue as to where 1914 originates

  by goingthruthemotions in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  so talking with my wife last night...i was explaining to her about a conversation i had with a person at work about end times.

  he has a strange belief that some scriptures in isaiah perdict something huge is going to happen in september of 2015. she then states that no one can predict the future only the father knows and he is in a cult.

  lol on the inside.. i then stated "what about 1914 and the dubs perdiction and what it means today" she said no there was never any predictions.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  To calculate the time of the second fulfillment, they take the 2520 days (since apparently they used 360 day lunar years at the time

  WT uses the solar calendar and the ancients used the lunar calendar (365 days vs. 360 days respectively). In WT methodology, it is mixing two completely different systems to get the end result, like mixing metric with standard for math. Essentially, 2 meters plus 3 feet = 5 feet. Sorry, no dice!

  No matter how you figure it (lunar or solar) you cannot draw a straight line from 607-1914. Mixing the two calendar year calculations makes it even more impossible.
• 
  47

  BOE 2014-07-13 Appointment and deletion of elders and ministerial servants

  by WatchTower87 in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  2014-07-13 appointment and deletion of elders and ministerial servantsto all bodies of elders.

  the link removed by request is also available at the forms link.

  the congregation secretary should arrange for this letter to be retained in the congregation permanent file of policy letters.

  1. 
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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  “Is there anything from your past, even before baptism, or in your personal or family life that disqualifies you...?"

  .

  Yes, Brother Circuit Overseer, before I became a JW, I was a "worldly" person, so everything I did disqualifies me you dumbass!

  .

  Because asking that has stopped many a perverted elder from being appointed...

  Unless he feels bad about it now and realizes he should have come forward at the time. In that case, he gets a mulligan and the CO will appoint him anyway (provided a generous green handshake is involved).

  Incidentally, why ask the question? Isn't Holy Spirit supposed to reveal all of this anyway, regardless of whether the brother admits to anything or not ?????