Posts by fjtoth

55

DO NOT CONTINUE SENDING EMAILS TO ME OR ATTEMPT TO CONTACT ME OR MY FAMILY.

by esw1966 in

jw
friends

isn't it 'nice' to finally get letters from home!?????.

this is the entire letter written to me by my sister:.

"do not continue sending emails to me or attempt to contact me or my family.".

fjtoth

Bobbi,

I know you have kindness in your heart and can probably only think the best of others. But please look at this situation from the JW organization's standpoint. According to "esw" (the one who started this thread), his sister and her husband are "basically fanatical" JWs.

I highly doubt that her not answering his emails was because "she had to struggle" to make the break from him. She was simply doing what the organization demands of her. The rule of the organization is that communication with disfellowshiped and disassociated persons must come to a complete stop, except possibly for necessary family business. That basically means "cease and desist, or else you will get disfellowshiped too!" That is a rule that has been in place for decades. Most JWs do not struggle in their minds and hearts with this requirement. In their hearts, they feel the organization's rule is the only way to teach the departing person a lesson. And they demonstrate much more concern for obedience to the organization than they show a desire to keep up family relationships.

She finally wrote, but not to express appreciation for his concern and interest in the family. Instead, she wrote as coldly as she could, as I see it:"DO NOT CONTINUE SENDING EMAILS TO ME OR ATTEMPT TO CONTACT ME OR MY FAMILY."

Where is the evidence of "struggle" and "hurt" or even that there might be a 'change of mind' someday?

Frank

55

DO NOT CONTINUE SENDING EMAILS TO ME OR ATTEMPT TO CONTACT ME OR MY FAMILY.

by esw1966 in

jw
friends

isn't it 'nice' to finally get letters from home!?????.

this is the entire letter written to me by my sister:.

"do not continue sending emails to me or attempt to contact me or my family.".

fjtoth

Whether we try communicating with our JW relatives tomorrow, next year or twenty years from now, the response will be the same. We need to understand that. There is never going to be a time when a JW in need will turn to an "apostate" relative for help, even if he or she is down to the last crumb of bread or last drop of water. Just as they will turn down blood that would likely keep them alive, they will turn down help from a non-JW relative, no matter how much they may be in need. If we don't understand that, we weren't in the organization long enough to know better.

As for the situation between my mother and me, there are thousands of similar cases around the world. JWs preach that there is little or no "natural affection" in the world, but they are among those who are most outstanding in the lack of it. And the majority remain blind to that fact all their lives. Rather than think highly of family relationships, they eagerly obey instructions from men they never met who tell them to stop speaking to the members of their own intimate family who leave the organization.

If family relationships matter more to us than freedom from mind control and personal regimentation by misguided leaders at headquarters, we should have stayed as we were. We should have known that we would be ostracized when we walked away from the organization. Now is not the time to be lamenting what we've done. Now is not the time to be thinking that maybe they will change if we try to be nice to them. The ONLY thing that will change their minds about us is our crawling back on our hands and knees as we beg for their forgiveness. If our relatives will welcome us on that basis only, why should we fret and fuss about getting back into their good graces? Such an attitude on our part is what they expect. As they see us, we are weeping and wailing and gnashing our teeth because of the calamities befalling us outside the "paradisaic conditions" of their organization. Why should we even in the slightest give them an inkling that such is the case, when in actuality it is not?

On the other hand, why should we try to make their lives more miserable? They don't want us in their lives, unless we meet the approval of men who rule over them and are no part of their intimate family and ours. They've rejected kinship with us in favor of a spiritual relationship with those men. Their happiness is with those men and not with us, unless we renounce what we have done and go crawling back in search of their forgiveness.

I know of two cases where the JW parents became incapable of looking after themselves, and their "disassociated" children and grandchildren made efforts to care for them. This was met with legal opposition obtained by financial support from the congregations involved, so that the children were forced to abandon any hope of caring for their parents who were in the December of their lives. So, folks, please understand what you are dealing with here. You are at odds with an organization that feels it has ownership of your JW relatives -- a wealthy organization that will oppose your every effort to be united with your family. In addition to that, your JW relatives like it that way. They don't want YOU. They want the friends they have who are in submission with them to those distant owners of their lives at headquarters. If you die before they do, they will not weep for you. You should understand that clearly. They will simply bemoan the fact that you "missed out on everlasting life," and just as God doesn't want you -- as they see him -- they don't want you either. On the other hand, they will gladly die for those non-members of your family who legislate to them from Brooklyn headquarters on how you should be viewed and treated.

Frank

55

DO NOT CONTINUE SENDING EMAILS TO ME OR ATTEMPT TO CONTACT ME OR MY FAMILY.

by esw1966 in

jw
friends

isn't it 'nice' to finally get letters from home!?????.

this is the entire letter written to me by my sister:.

"do not continue sending emails to me or attempt to contact me or my family.".

fjtoth

I'm disappointed with the entries that suggest you should send flowers or a brief message. Dealing with JW relatives is simply not like dealing with relatives who are offended over something personal. You are dealing with a religion here, a religion that requires your JW relatives to ignore you. Should we not show ourselves respectful of others regardless of their obligation to show disrespect toward us? Two wrongs don't make a right. We need to be grown up men and women who know how to move on with our lives, just as others in this thread have urged.

My mother is 93 and hasn't spoken to me for 15 years because I left JWs. It is only natural that a mother would want to communicate with her son, but the religion won't allow it. My mother will die without having spoken to me or heard from me for many years, due to "organizational instructions" from Brooklyn. Should I hurt my mother's sensibilities by making efforts to disregard her wishes? It's bad enough that she's enslaved in mind to foolish men at headquarters. I view that as misery enough, and I have no desire to add to the pain.

It would do no good to try getting in touch with my mother. It would only entrench her more in her beliefs, and it would convince her that I'm paying the price of hurt and distraction for committing such a monumentally terrible sin as leaving "God's organization." That is the same response anyone here will get by sending flowers or by trying to communicate in any way with a JW who believes with all his or her heart that it is wrong in the eyes of God himself to have contacts with so-called "apostates."

Let's accept that fact of life and move on with gratitude and joy that we are no longer in bondage to the mind slavery that exists among JWs.

Frank

55

DO NOT CONTINUE SENDING EMAILS TO ME OR ATTEMPT TO CONTACT ME OR MY FAMILY.

by esw1966 in

jw
friends

isn't it 'nice' to finally get letters from home!?????.

this is the entire letter written to me by my sister:.

"do not continue sending emails to me or attempt to contact me or my family.".

fjtoth

You must respond with dead silence and get on with your life. Period. No last words, no contact of any kind. It may be tough but it really is your only option.

I agree with this 100%. Like cowering little puppets, JWs are scared to death about receiving mail from "apostates." When I didn't know any better, shortly after I left JWs, I sent a brief message to someone as close as a relative, and like a good JW she returned the envelope with the following message written on it: "We don't accept junk mail at this house." JWs are extremely childish, but I think the Christian (and loving) thing is to respect her wishes and not send any message at all. Let's face it: She won't read anything you send, anyway. So what's the point of wasting time even thinking about what to write?

Frank

212

WTS hasn't corrected mistakes in NWT on John 20:28.....

by A-Team in

nwt scriptures: john 20:28-29 .

28 in answer thomas said to him: my lord and my god!

29 jesus said to him: because you have seen me have you believed?

fjtoth

17

DRUNKINESS AND ALCOHOL AT BETHEL

by badboy in

jw
friends

how much was there?

fjtoth

In fairness, I have to say that in my 40 years at Bethel, it was rare to hear that somebody got drunk. Perhaps we heard of such a case about every 5 years or so, at the most. Occasionally someone got dismissed for alcohol abuse. Of course, in a place where everybody is supposed to be exemplary, one would expect that there would be even less such cases.

But keep this in mind: There are areas in New York City where people are quite hospitable. I was assigned to a congregation where most members were Italian or Jewish, and both nationalities often take wine or beer (or both) with their meals. That's where I tasted wine for the first time in my life, and I suspect the same was true of others who were assigned to congregations in that area. So I don't blame Bethel itself for introducing alcohol to the staff. Still, I'm also not saying that you can't get into a wrong group of friends at Bethel and find one day that you've developed a problem with alcohol.

Frank

212

WTS hasn't corrected mistakes in NWT on John 20:28.....

by A-Team in

nwt scriptures: john 20:28-29 .

28 in answer thomas said to him: my lord and my god!

29 jesus said to him: because you have seen me have you believed?

fjtoth

Six more distortions of truth and fact put forward in this thread by "Wayne L"

(With commentary in red)

47. Wayne said, "I don't have a religious bone in my body. I think religion is bunk." But earlier Wayne said, "Every JW I ever met is the person we should all be." ( So, Wayne can't make up his mind whether JWs are "bunk" or what "we should all be." Really, Wayne is putting on a pretense, as is obvious to anybody who reads his entries. He pretends to be a mere bystander while he is actually a JW defender, probably even a baptized one! )

48. Wayne said, "I have a habit of knowing what I'm getting into." Yet, Wayne said later, "I have fallen for many foolish things, like pyramid schemes and such. And I started to believe in astrology at one point . " Wayne also mentioned that he spent HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS on those "many foolish things." (So, Wayne pretends to be knowledgeable and wise about JWs, but admits on the other hand that he is an extremely foolish and gullible person!)

49. Wayne asked, "And how does one become a JW nurse or doctor or lawyer or scientist or teacher if education is frowned upon?" (This, again, is evidence of Wayne's false pretense. He knows very well that very, very few JWs have gone to college after they were baptized. The organization frowns on it excessively, and Wayne pretends he doesn't know that!)

50. Wayne also asked, "And how can the Internet be taboo and yet WT has a website?" (Wayne here pretends he doesn't know about the contradictions and hypocrisy of the WT Society. He pretends to use logic while closing his eyes and mind to the fact that the Society has clearly warned JWs against the internet in the "Watchtower" magazine and in the "Kingdom Ministry" newsletter).

51. Wayne said, "I am not 'blinded' as one poster said." (Wayne has demonstrated in this thread that he is blind about JWs not only naively, but deliberately.)

52. Wayne described the persons in this forum who expose the evils of the Watchtower Society as 'vindictive' and as "doing absolutely no good in the world." (This betrays Wayne's ultimate lack of sincerity and honesty, to say the very least. If Wayne was true to himself, after noting the clear facts about the WT Society and JWs presented in this forum, he would acknowledge that he has been defending the indefensible! Those doing good in the world are those who build hospitals and in other ways care for the less fortunate, but the JWs condemn all of these as members of Babylon the Great who will suffer a horrendous death in an upcoming battle where God himself will destroy them just because they are not JWs!)

3

I just bought a Laser Jet Printer...

by zeroday in

jw
friends

my ole ink jet printer gave up the ghost today so i headed down to best buy and bought a hp 1020 laser jet printer and holy molley this thing is blazing fast.

i thought of buying the color laser jet printer but i rarely use color to print.

i love this thing....

fjtoth

I think HP laser printers are hard to beat. I bought one 15 years ago when I was still a JW and have used it several times a week since then. It's still running like new. Mine's a LaserJet 4P.

39

Laptop Users I need your help

by noni1974 in

jw
friends

i'm going to buy my first laptop in the next week or two.i want to know what else i'll end up needing to go online with it at a wifi hotspot?there are a few of them around where i live at coffee shops and things like that.do i need a wireless service provider when i'm at these hot spots??.

also what would you recomend i get for use at home?i have a dsl modem that will allow me to have 4 computers pluged into one modem.i want to be able to use my laptop anywhere in my house.what do i need to reach these goals with a laptop??.

i've heard of wireless cards and wireless routers.but i don't know what they do or if i need them.i've never used a laptop before i have only ever used a desktop..

fjtoth

John,

We have a Tiger Direct store in the neighborhood. They just set up this store less than a year ago. You are so right. When I happen to be out of town and go shopping for computer-related stuff and the store I'm in doesn't have it, almost always they tell me to try Tiger Direct for quality, selection and price.

Frank

39

Laptop Users I need your help

by noni1974 in

jw
friends

i'm going to buy my first laptop in the next week or two.i want to know what else i'll end up needing to go online with it at a wifi hotspot?there are a few of them around where i live at coffee shops and things like that.do i need a wireless service provider when i'm at these hot spots??.

also what would you recomend i get for use at home?i have a dsl modem that will allow me to have 4 computers pluged into one modem.i want to be able to use my laptop anywhere in my house.what do i need to reach these goals with a laptop??.

i've heard of wireless cards and wireless routers.but i don't know what they do or if i need them.i've never used a laptop before i have only ever used a desktop..

fjtoth

Noni,

I agree with your reasons for staying with XP. I also agree with What-a-Coincidence about Compaqs. Here in Canada, so I've heard, they aren't very dependable and often need repairs of one kind or another.

Frank