Posts by losingit

31

You ever notice how personalities change when CO comes around?

by dugout in

jw
friends

isn't it sickning when normaly people in the cong don't even speak to you.

but when the co visits comes they want to shake your hand and even (cringe) hug you?

then as soon as he leaves back to normal.

losingit

Youre right, though, about the visit being disorganized. I noticed that after a while and just absolutely HATED going out in service during the visit.

Then when we switched congregations, the freaking PO /COBE DRAGGED his feet every time I wanted to sign up to go out in service with the CO. He just wouldn't put me down until all of the pioneers made their request first. Ugh!! One time myhusband and I even asked for the privilege of hosting a midweek lunch, the PO/COBE REFUSED!!! Geeezzz he was such a freaking JERK. He made me and my husband feel like such tremendous crap. Makes me sad thinking about it.

Once again-- SO GLAD I'M OUT OF THE CULT!!!

31

You ever notice how personalities change when CO comes around?

by dugout in

jw
friends

isn't it sickning when normaly people in the cong don't even speak to you.

but when the co visits comes they want to shake your hand and even (cringe) hug you?

then as soon as he leaves back to normal.

losingit

Hey!!!! Not everyone wants to show off :-P :-P :-P. LOL

I made a point of going out in service when the CO came around bc I actually BELIEVED he was imparting special spiritual knowledge. One time I did aux pioneer during the month of his visit bc I wanted to go to that special pioneer meeting they kept talking about. I was motivated for spiritual reasons, not bc I was trying to impress anyone.

I stopped being so enthusiastic about the CO visits when I sensed how they showed favoritism. Favoritism is a HUGE pet peeve of mine. I went out with the wife of the CO once and all she wanted to do was go to the Korean supermarket. She wasn't interested in sharing anything uplifting with me beyond her own criticism of my decision to go to grad school. When I told my husband what happened he said-- Why would you tell the CO wife about grad school!!! He was upset about it since we knew we would be criticized and looked down upon. I got tired of hiding it as if it were something shameful.

27

Panic Attacks? It's Probably Only Your Heart...

by Englishman in

if you suffer from anxiety and panics, the problem could lie with your heart and not with your mind.. you might have mitral valve syndrome!http://www.mvpsupport.com/.

i know what im talking about because i have mitral valve syndrome.

years ago, i would sometimes become totally panic stricken for no reason whatsoever.

losingit

Marked

11

Panic attacks + "You had another nightmare last night": Part 2

by sd-7 in

jw
friends

ever since i got married and had to return to cult activities to keep peace in my home, i've been having panic attacks.

i think i'm having panic attacks.

... anyone else go through panic attacks?

losingit

I believe I've been suffering from mini panic attacks lately. When I start to think about the past 3 years and everything that's happened my heart races to the point I can't breathe. I have a lot of conflicting emotions that I'm trying to manage, but clearly I'm not taking care of it well. I'm still struggling. Although not all of my panic attacks are jw-related, a lot of what I'm living is a direct result of me not being able to manage life inside and outside the cult.

Readingabout your experience sd-7 and those of others helps me to see where I'm at and why. Thank you for sharing. I do hope you feel better now.

28

What would you do if JW's lifted the shunning policy?

by bsand20 in

jw
friends

have you guys asked yourself that question?

what if the gb decided that "new light" revealed to them that disfellowshipping was wrong and they would do away with it for current dfd members as well...... .......16 years of my life.

would i welcome my family back?

losingit

It wouldn't make a difference in my life. I don't have family in, just friends, or at least they were. I'm still very hesitant of continuing contact with a couple I knew at the KH. We considered each other as family, but the belief system is too dangerous for my girls to be around them again regularly. The same thought applies to my other friends too. Now that I know TTATT I want to protect my girs from it forever.

63

Your "Things That Make You Go Hmmm?" List

by FlyingHighNow in

jw
friends

i'll wager that the number is close to 100 percent.

what number?

the number of jws who have lists--lists of things that make them go hmmm or even wha'???

losingit

FHN- yes! Their ideas about marriage just absolutely SUCK!!! My husband and I were fine for the most part when we first got married bc we were not the tradtional jw couple. He helped around the house, we discussed our financial situation, made joint decisions. When he decided that he was going to.put that aside and become a typical jw chauvinist my-oh-my did things REALLY start falling apart. That's part of the reason we are now divorced!

63

Your "Things That Make You Go Hmmm?" List

by FlyingHighNow in

jw
friends

i'll wager that the number is close to 100 percent.

what number?

the number of jws who have lists--lists of things that make them go hmmm or even wha'???

losingit

Added to my previous list: Satan, the bogeyman with his demon posse.... everything bad was blamed on Satan. Satan was everywhere, permeates everything. It got to be suffocating and just plain old stupid. After a while I thought (and even told some brothers and sisters), " is Satan omniscient, omnipotent?" Really, it just got out of hand! "Oh Satan out that temptation in front of you." I felt Satan was given more credit, had taken more action than Jehovah himself in jw eyes! Ridiculous! F#@% Satan and his crew! Got tired of hearing the bs so much that I rolled my eyes with indignation each time.

Disdain for charitable organizations-- acc to Jws , the Society is the ONLY charity (LOL) that truly cares and provides for the general public. Laughable and HIGHLY offensive-- and that was when I was STILL IN THE ORG! TTATT confirmed what I already knew/sensed-- that fs is garbage, a waste of time. The WTBTS provides nothing to anyone. Instead it starves ppl.

33

I think this is closure for me.

by quellycatface in

well, i have finally got rid of my baptism cards.

the congratulations cards....the wt ones, the ones with sheep on etc.... all gone.

they dated back to 23/09/2000.. has anyone else "purged" their witness past this way?.

losingit

One of the first things I did when I discovered TTATT was burn my blood card while smoking my first cigar and drinking some good ol' Caribbean rum! It felt great, a HUGE relief.

I got rid of my magazines over the course of a few months after I moved. That was also something very special and liberating-- I honestly felt cleansed. It all went immediately to the recycling bin. :-)

I also got rid of my notebooks-- took pics of the covers to remember them by, also some pages where my daughter drew at the meetings LOL , and some pages that had some prayers I wrote to Jehovah.

I still have the badge to the last assembly I went to. I MIGHT hangonto that for a while. But idk, I just want topurge it all. Feels too good to let it go.

48

Corpus Linguistics - Text Analysis of All Watchtower Publications since 1800's

by objectivetruth in

i've been working on a side project for a while.

the goal of the project is to create a comprehensive database of all publications throughout history.

with this database i will be able to instantly find trends in text,sentiment of writing, methods used, and scriptures emphasized.. essentially i will be able to put a word like "apostate" into my tool, and instantly receive a report showing every time the word (or similar words) has been used in all publications since 1870.. i will also be able to create reports showing word density used in publications over time.. so i'll be able to see that the word "governing body" has increased in usage 25% year over year since 1975.. or i will be able to analyze the november 2014 wt and run an algorithm that helps to determine, what the tone and motive of the writing is.. the thing that i am most excited about is the ability to instantly find every occurence of a scripture in every publication.. this will be a great tool to find flip flops in doctrine as well as inaccuracies in biblical interpretation.. i will for sure publish all interesting findings here.. .

losingit

Cool beans! I'd love to see the analysis this will offer us all. :-D

26

What did you do with old WT/Awake magazines?

by naazira in

jw
friends

when you were a witness, what did you do with your old watchtower (public/ study versions) and awake magazines?

i know for some throwing away a magazine is comparable to burning a quran.

i never threw them out!

losingit

I threw all of mine out when I was kicked out of my home (had 30 days to pack up all of my belongings and the girls belongings) . I held onto a few magazines about being a good wife and being a good parent. I still thought that the teachings were practical. Haha.

Now,I'm trying to make space for the new baby arriving-- so all magazines, books, ANYTHING were put in recycling. Even all of my notebooks. I did take pictures of them as those notebooks represented my years of dedication to the org and to the hubby. I even found prayers I wrote to Jehovah asking him to be a better more patient long suffering wife and a better more patient mother. Prayers. They were proof, those prayers, of the work love dedication I felt and put forth towards my marriage and husband. I was happy to find them andtook pics of them too.

I'm completely WT literature free today. I do hope a JW knocks on my door, however. I'd like to do what Robert has suggested many times-- take the literature, write jwfacts on it, then hand it back to them. That's whats next on my plan for WT lit.