Garrett

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Posts by Garrett

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  23

  Asking Her Out - Follow Up - Advice?

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  soooo..... going to ask that wonderful lady for her phone number tonight as per everyone's advice... first time i will ever be doing that with a non jw girl...erm...woman.

  my dear female friends, what are some genuine questions i can pose to get a conversation rolling and what are some other questions/things i can ask/say to restart a stalled conversation?

  i'm very very shy when talking to new people... especially someone i'm interested in, and have some social anxiety.

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  Garrett

  About to leave.Wanted to thank you all for your suggestions, help and kind words.

  Wish me luck!

  Love you all and will let you know how it went :)
• 
  19

  Recent Ads on this site - Simon this needs some fixing

  by done4good in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am noticing that when some of the ads run, the page keeps scrolling upward towards them.

  this is annoying and should be addressed, as it makes some threads almost impossible to read.

  have same effect on two different oss, (same browser type, firefox).

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  Garrett

  sometimes (most of the time) not clearing cookies and history will cause your internet browser to act quite strangely. I recommend clearing cookies and history, closing browser restarting site and see if it still happens.
• 
  23

  Asking Her Out - Follow Up - Advice?

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  soooo..... going to ask that wonderful lady for her phone number tonight as per everyone's advice... first time i will ever be doing that with a non jw girl...erm...woman.

  my dear female friends, what are some genuine questions i can pose to get a conversation rolling and what are some other questions/things i can ask/say to restart a stalled conversation?

  i'm very very shy when talking to new people... especially someone i'm interested in, and have some social anxiety.

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  Garrett

  @katewild gotcha gotcha. Guys like that deserve it, then I guess ;) I've never been nor do I think I will ever that type of guy so I should be safe!
• 
  23

  Asking Her Out - Follow Up - Advice?

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  soooo..... going to ask that wonderful lady for her phone number tonight as per everyone's advice... first time i will ever be doing that with a non jw girl...erm...woman.

  my dear female friends, what are some genuine questions i can pose to get a conversation rolling and what are some other questions/things i can ask/say to restart a stalled conversation?

  i'm very very shy when talking to new people... especially someone i'm interested in, and have some social anxiety.

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  Garrett

  @katewild ah winding guys up? What does that mean, eh? You enjoy toying with us? XD
• 
  23

  Asking Her Out - Follow Up - Advice?

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  soooo..... going to ask that wonderful lady for her phone number tonight as per everyone's advice... first time i will ever be doing that with a non jw girl...erm...woman.

  my dear female friends, what are some genuine questions i can pose to get a conversation rolling and what are some other questions/things i can ask/say to restart a stalled conversation?

  i'm very very shy when talking to new people... especially someone i'm interested in, and have some social anxiety.

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• 

  Garrett

  @katewild Gotcha! Job, than hobbies, I like it. I know you can't really prepare which makes me really sad to be honest xD But I sincerely thank you for your suggestions, they really helped :D
• 
  23

  Asking Her Out - Follow Up - Advice?

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  soooo..... going to ask that wonderful lady for her phone number tonight as per everyone's advice... first time i will ever be doing that with a non jw girl...erm...woman.

  my dear female friends, what are some genuine questions i can pose to get a conversation rolling and what are some other questions/things i can ask/say to restart a stalled conversation?

  i'm very very shy when talking to new people... especially someone i'm interested in, and have some social anxiety.

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  Garrett

  @sir82 Right... How? Any tips?
• 
  23

  Asking Her Out - Follow Up - Advice?

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  soooo..... going to ask that wonderful lady for her phone number tonight as per everyone's advice... first time i will ever be doing that with a non jw girl...erm...woman.

  my dear female friends, what are some genuine questions i can pose to get a conversation rolling and what are some other questions/things i can ask/say to restart a stalled conversation?

  i'm very very shy when talking to new people... especially someone i'm interested in, and have some social anxiety.

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• 

  Garrett

  @katewild She seems to have a really wonderful personality. She seems to be quite adventurous, fun, kind and good hearted. Unlike most other people my age, she seems on my maturity level, and I think I may be able to have an intelectual conversation with her... Something that I don't really get to do with many... She's also quite attractive :p

  @freemindfade Hmm My phone consists of a unbreakable box used for calling and text, it has nothing on it. As for what I do... I do many things. I do martial arts, I love anything that is outdoor related. I used to be a semi professional tennis player, I used to live in the US for 13 years and now live in France (where the girl is from)... I don't know... there's a lot of things that I do that I think are interesting xD

  @vidiot yes, you're right. I almost forgot xD
• 
  23

  Asking Her Out - Follow Up - Advice?

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  soooo..... going to ask that wonderful lady for her phone number tonight as per everyone's advice... first time i will ever be doing that with a non jw girl...erm...woman.

  my dear female friends, what are some genuine questions i can pose to get a conversation rolling and what are some other questions/things i can ask/say to restart a stalled conversation?

  i'm very very shy when talking to new people... especially someone i'm interested in, and have some social anxiety.

  1. 
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  3. 
• 

  Garrett

  Soooo....

  Going to ask that wonderful lady for her phone number tonight as per everyone's advice... First time I will ever be doing that with a non JW girl...erm...woman.

  My dear female friends, what are some genuine questions I can pose to get a conversation rolling and what are some other questions/things I can ask/say to restart a stalled conversation?

  I'm VERY VERY shy when talking to new people... especially someone I'm interested in, and have some social anxiety. As my friend suggested, I'm grabbing onto my manhood and giving it all I got. I'm already stressing out asper my usual self since I tend to over analyze anything and everything that interests me.

  I also tend to get myself ready for disappointment since she will most likely not say yes even though she did seem rather interested.

  Anyways... I need you guys <3

  Love and peace,

  Garrett
• 
  21

  Today I learned - I'm incapable of having a relationship

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  hello my dear friends,.

  while this post may not be entirely witness related, i figured i'd write out my thoughts here as a form of release and reflection.. recently, a lot has changed in my life.

  i'm away from home for the first time in a long while training to get certified in a field i'm not even sure i want to work in anymore.

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  Garrett

  Hi all,

  Thank you so much for all your responses. I've learned so much from each one of them. Unfortunately, I still have no clue how to reply to each one of you so that you can see it. So if you're reading this, thank you so much for all your kind and insightful comments.

  This Thursday I'm asking the girl out. I'll let all of you know how it goes :)

  Peace and Love,

  Garrett
• 
  21

  Today I learned - I'm incapable of having a relationship

  by Garrett in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  hello my dear friends,.

  while this post may not be entirely witness related, i figured i'd write out my thoughts here as a form of release and reflection.. recently, a lot has changed in my life.

  i'm away from home for the first time in a long while training to get certified in a field i'm not even sure i want to work in anymore.

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  Garrett

  Hello my dear friends,

  While this post may not be entirely witness related, I figured I'd write out my thoughts here as a form of release and reflection.

  Recently, a lot has changed in my life. I'm away from home for the first time in a long while training to get certified in a field I'm not even sure I want to work in anymore. I am surrounded by people I have nothing in common with, people that are much older than me but act like infants, people that I have no desire to associate with, yet I have to work with them every day of the week and put up with their miserable selves.

  In addition to that, something wonderful happened. I went to a night club for the first time in my life! A friend wanted to go and kept pestering me to come with him. Upon arrival, I sat at the bar, drowning in my thoughts when the bartender decides to come up and have a little chat with me. Seeing how I speak semi-broken french, she asked where I was from, what I was doing here. We talked about her, how she has a kid and how she has a desire for adventure. Anyways, it felt wonderful having a woman seem to be geniunly interested in me. Not what I seemed to get from the witness girls. So, the week after, I decide to go back to the hell hole that is a night club and see if there might be something more than a friendly discussion. Turns out, she comes in before work, sits at a table next to my friends and I and can't stop looking at me until I make eye contact so she can say "hi" in quite the excited fashion. Minutes later, my friend says he has to go out for a smoke and invites me to come with him so he can chat with me about the bartender who we'll call Amy. Well, we didn't even have the time to chat because here she comes looking for me worried that I had left without even talking to her.

  And this is where I find out I'm incapable of a romantic relationship with women. She starts talking to me and I freeze. Not only can I not express myself the way I want to in French, but it's been years since I've spoken to a girl, face to face who seemed interested in me. So, as per the usual fashion, I blank and there is wonderful, awkward silence. I manage to restart the conversation for a few minutes before she goes back in to work. My friend then says, Garrett, either she really likes you or she sees you as a tourist and wants to be nice and chat. The minute he says that, all my hopes come crashing down and I realize that all women that I'm interested in will always see me as a friend and nothing more. I decided to go back to the bar this weekend, ask her for her phone number so we can chat (because it's impossible to talk to her where she works) and get to know one another. But at the same time, I don't want to... Why? Because I know that she won't be interested. I will muster my courage to ask her, have my heart pounding a hole through my chest and she will take her shoe and crush it until it's a big pile of mush. In addition to that, I know what will happen if she, by some miracle, does accept...I'll have to do what I always do and sabotage the relationship.

  Sabotage is my middle name. Every. Single. Relationship. At first, I enjoy the relationship. It's fun and I enjoy having someone to talk to, someone to care for. However, it seems that with time, that fades and is replaced by feelings of withdrawal, guilt, sadness, and fear. Ultimately, I end up losing all feelings for the person I just previously treated like a queen, like the love of my life. I end up slowly withdrawing from them. I talk less and less, I show less and less interest, I feel sad when I speak to them, I feel guilty... I don't know why these feelings slowly creep up, but they do.

  Then, when I'm alone for a time, I feel a bit sad but quickly feel much better. I feel like myself again. I'm happy to be alone. My dilemma, though, is that at the same time, I DO want a relationship, I just never feel right when in one. The person can be great, can be exactly wat I'm looking for, but I will always find the bad, find reasons not to be in a relationship, find reasons to stop talking to them. I try to figure out what's wrong with me, what causes this, but am unable to find the cause. I ask myself, is it because I've been alone all my life? Is it because I thrived by myself since I was 7 years old and whenever I did have a reliationship with someone, that someone let me down in the end? If so, why do I not think about those specific reasons, but end up feeling this way because of them? Do you understand what I'm trying to say?

  Then there are the amical relationships. While I enjoy having a relationship with someone, I get tired of people rather quickly. I'll do everything and anything for you if you are my friend, no questions asked, but after some time, I once again, withdraw within myself and no longer wish to communicate with you for extended periods of time. In fact, upon reflection, I feel as if extended amounts of interactions with people actually causes me to become quite depressed. I'm really not sure why, though.

  Perhaps this stems from other issues caused by my abusive upbringing... or because of the cult I was in for 6 years of my life... or a culmination of both... Or perhaps something different, entirely... I have no idea.

  Anyways, I thank you for your time in reading this if you've come this far and hope that you've had a wonderful weekend.

  As always, peace and love,

  Garrett