the cognitive dissonance amongst jws has never been more obvious to me then what i just experience in the last 5 min.
long story short i had a phone conversation w/my mom about some things and i mentioned to her to look up what has been going on with their beloved organization in australia.
brother geoffrey jackson of the holy governing body was caught lying numerous times about several subjects including disassociations & shunning.
CalebInFloroda - But being in the state of denial or simply believing a false doctrine is not the same as "cognitive dissonance."
I would agree. Being in a state of denial or justifying a false doctrine would be more of a response to CD not the CD itself. Denial, justification, etc. are some of the typical responses to resolve the CD.
do you ever wonder why out of all the witnesses, you are the one that woke up?
i wonder many times why me.
i know many men and women that are much, much better persons than me; either they are much smarter, more humble, kinder, more successful, or just better persons all around.
Unfortunately my story is not as noble as most. I was disfellowshipped when I was 24 for having a one night relationship with a worldly woman. I was an MS. My mother was anointed. And, at the time I was close to becoming an elder.
It wasn't TTATT that woke me up. It was the fact that I felt so guilty for having sinned that I felt unworthy of forgiveness. I believed for years after I deserved to die at Armageddon. So I stayed out and did not try to get reinstated. Instead I spent my time working hard and learning. And over the years I came to realize the JWs for what they are - i.e. yet another religion that claims to have truth. A dime a dozen...
But over the years things changed. I learned more. I thought more. Being disfellowshipped was the most painful thing that has ever happened to me. And I lost my family and friends. But, if I hadn't been disfellowshipped perhaps I would still be in or lamenting years of wasted time.
I admire those who walk out on principle. I don't have such honor. I got kicked out and never looked back.
well i know i've been posting a lot of topics like this lately and i'm sorry if i sound whiny or annoying.
my parents were asking me why i was so upset lately and i ended up just telling them the whole truth.
i told them i don't believe in god or the bible because i don't have any evidence of anything.
BlackWolf, a lot of ex-JWs sometimes get the anxious feeling "what if they're right?" (basically Pascal's wager). You may experience that at times but the more you read and study (as you are doing) the better you will feel.
For what is worth, here is how I deal with it - I DON"T CARE IF THEY ARE RIGHT. The God of the Bible they represent and their Organization is immoral. I'm better than their God (and "his Organization"). And, if he is exists, I'm good with the idea of dying knowing I had the moral high-ground.
this is interesting, i would love to hear of some experiences.
i was speaking with someone offline about their talking to someone and coming to find out that person was waking up/awake too.
the reason i find it interesting, is because it is such a fragile situation, a dance where the two people don't trust each other enough to just speak freely like they are afraid of being turned into the kgb.
I do not envy anyone having to dance around trying to identify each other. Be careful out there.
On a lighter note, I think faders may want to have some sort of secret phrase/counter-phrase or something to identify themselves.
Like that scene in the original "The Andromeda Strain":
Guard: Howdy.
Dutton: Howdy Doody.
Guard: You got the time?
Dutton: My watch stopped at 11:46.
Guard: Darn shame.
Dutton: Must be the heat.
hey guys,.
i'm just venting here because obviously, i can vent to no one else because i am still in the congregation.. jws as a whole do nothing to help the poor, the homeless, the sick, the hungry, though some individual jws do.
because they are too busy giving to the gb.
there are a lot of things that make me have days like this, the utter embarrassment of being are part of a cult that protects child abusers, that enforces emotional brutality through shunning, and that lies constantly.
the lying i can tolerate, the world is built on bullshit, i have a high lie tolerance.
i can ignore it if it has no effect on me etc.
So they sustain this thing on two levels. wow..
I totally get what you are saying. My family is structured in a similar way as well. My mother is anointed and has been holding control of (and court over) all of the rest of the family for over 30 years. A cult within a cult...A bubble inside a bubble...
hi everyone, this is my first post so go easy on me :) i have been a witness all of my life (i'm 37) and truly believed it until 3 years ago.
my husband and i had become spiritually weak and over time i began to question more and more until i came to the conclusion that the witnesses were not the true religion but just one of many religions and that if god is there then there are many paths to get to him.
anyway, i've battled with keeping going as my husband still believed and i didn't want to be in a divided household as we have a young daughter and thought it would be very confusing for her (and us).
freemindfade - But be cautious, for me I always had "wordy" friends, I fear some who have only known friends in the "truth", they go out and get hurt and feel the witnesses were right.
This is very true. And, it applies to not just "worldly" people you will meet but other experiences you may want to have. As a JW I was woefully ill-equipped to deal with the real world and made some mistakes along the way. Take it slowly. You need to learn to navigate in a different environment you are used to.
hi everyone, this is my first post so go easy on me :) i have been a witness all of my life (i'm 37) and truly believed it until 3 years ago.
my husband and i had become spiritually weak and over time i began to question more and more until i came to the conclusion that the witnesses were not the true religion but just one of many religions and that if god is there then there are many paths to get to him.
anyway, i've battled with keeping going as my husband still believed and i didn't want to be in a divided household as we have a young daughter and thought it would be very confusing for her (and us).
Theburstbubble, welcome to reality...
How have people adapted to life outside the truth?
Everyone adapts in different ways. I had a lifetime of beliefs to unlearn and replace with beliefs and ideas based on critical thinking and evidence. It's scary and exhilarating. And, you may want to seek counseling (e.g. there are therapists who specialize in cults). Oh, and you will know you are making progress when you stop calling it "the Truth".
Making friends?Have you found your new friends to be as genuine?
Lots. And the cool thing is that these friends don't leave you if they disagree with you.
How about faith? I feel like I still want to believe in God but don't know even where to begin.
One place to begin is to ask yourself "why do you feel you still want to believe in God?". This is a question that most of us were never afforded the opportunity to ask. We were simply taught to accept this at face value with the same evidence we thought the JWs were "the Truth". How did that work out for you? So, maybe a good place to start is to ask a lot of questions especially ones that start with "Why?"... Take your time, challenge all your assumptions, and be gentle on yourself.
For what is worth, I am an atheist now and see no reason for faith. Faith ultimately comes to believing in something without good demonstrable evidence or evidence to the contrary. That did not seem like a path to truth to me. And, after some time I also realized that religion does not have a monopoly on those "spiritual" experiences, the sense of awe, wonder, joy, etc. You can have those feelings and experiences in other ways,
there are a lot of things that make me have days like this, the utter embarrassment of being are part of a cult that protects child abusers, that enforces emotional brutality through shunning, and that lies constantly.
the lying i can tolerate, the world is built on bullshit, i have a high lie tolerance.
i can ignore it if it has no effect on me etc.
What SecretSlaveClass said...
Freemindfade, you seem to me by all your posts that you are good and very thoughtful person. I empathize and my heart goes out to people like you and others. Only you know what is best for you.
On a side note, every time that I see a new scandal or crazy idea from the Organization, I think to myself, "...this is it...surely this will be the one thing that will give those standing on the ledge the excuse to jump...surely there will be a mass exodus..." And, it does not happen. I think some people are waiting for perfect circumstances. There really are none. Or they may be waiting for others to jump first...
I have this horrible thought that one day, a few years from now, a large number of JWs are going to wake up and recognize they only stayed because the people they loved seemed to want to stay. But those people stayed only because they thought you wanted to stay. If it wasn't so tragic it would be comedic.
we have the convention this weekend and many jw families are arriving.
one family that ive known for many years from new mexico stopped by to visit my mom.
hes been an elder since the 80s.
John Aquila - "...if you want to go and sit down for three days to listen to the same information you get at the Kingdom Hall, for the next 20 years, that’s your choice..."
Priceless. Nicely done.
