In the late 1980's or early 1990's (I believe), I had my 15 minutes of fame as Benjamin in one of the dramas that dealt with Joseph and Pharaoh. Sorry I can't remember the exact year. It was a district convention in Denver.
StrongHaiku
JoinedPosts by StrongHaiku
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57
Did you participate in a Drama?
by Hecce ini am bringing this up because even it was a lot of work, for the majority of the friends this was a rewarding experience.
camaraderie, joking, costumes, props and when the time came the celebrity status of being in the drama.. back in the 50s and 60s, conventions could be as long as 8 days and from about 1966 the dramas became an integral part of the program.
we had one per day and the brothers looked forward to their presentation.
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jw family loves to ask df'd ones for money!
by Ghiagirl inwell it finally happened!
we have been waiting about a year for this, my dfd husbands family asked us for money.
even though his own father hasn't met our 8 month old son.
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StrongHaiku
The following is what I am thinking about sending my family the next time they ask for money:
"I would be happy to give you money but I have no assurance that it will not go to the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society. Based on current news, they are being investigated for a number of criminal actions and losing civil action suits in court. I, in good conscience, cannot possibly align myself with, or contribute to, such an organization."
Time to fight back, folks...
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jw family loves to ask df'd ones for money!
by Ghiagirl inwell it finally happened!
we have been waiting about a year for this, my dfd husbands family asked us for money.
even though his own father hasn't met our 8 month old son.
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StrongHaiku
Ghiagirl,
I truly empathize with your circumstances and your dilema. For over a 20 year period, I gave my JW family tens of thousands of dollars in cash and resources (e.g. laptops, cars). Here is summary of the circumstances:
- My family, like many JWs, do not know how to manage money and have not been planing for the present let alone the future.
- My family, like many JWs, believe that the DF'ed are just another source of "unrighteous riches" that they feel they can tap into.
- As I was DF'ed, I felt for many years an overbearing sense of guilt that compelled me to buy their attention even love. The only time they contacted me was when they needed something and I, being the fool, would be so grateful that it never occurred to me the nature of the relationship.
- When I was no longer a JW, I focused my time and energy on working hard in building a safety net for myself. Therefore, I had resources that I could share and felt selfish not to do so.
This was a perfect storm for exploitation.
I would not presume to offer you advice because your circumstances may be unique. However, here are some thoughts to consider from my experience:
1. Even if they tell you it is a "loan" for "this one time", please be prepared that they may never pay you back and continue to keep asking for more in the future.
2. Don't let them trade on your guilt. You are not responsible for their poor financial decisions and, if you feel like they have the moral high-ground, please remember that they, unlike you, are supporting a criminal organization.
3. Don't be fooled into thinking you are "their last best hope". Their indoctrination excuses and even encourages a parasitic attitude to "worldly" social services (e.g. my family are experts at milking social services, which, by the way, you and everyone else pays for in taxes). In addition, they can try and tap "the friends" they constantly fawn over.
4. Have a clear view of what sacrifices you will have to make vs. the ones they will have to make. For example, my family asked me for money but they had cable TV, took vacations, and did not live to a budget (On a side note, in my book, if you don't have a budget, you are broke and just don't know it). If you have to go without cable, or vacations, and adhere to a budget, they should as well.
5. If after all of this you decide to help them, set boundaries and condition that you can live with. For me, it was telling them that they would not receive any money from me unless we worked towards having a normal family relationship. I have not heard back from them in 4 years.
My family, like many JWs, are not bad people. They simply have poor planning and financial skills, have been conditioned to use people not in their in-group in any way they want, and are convinced that the end will come soon enough that their problems will go away.
Like I said, I truly empathize. It is not easy walking the tightrope between wanting to help people you love and enabling their ongoing self-destructive delusion. I for one, will no longer pick up the tab.
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StrongHaiku
First thing that came to mind? Cathulu being worshipped at the "Burning Man" festival. -
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Cognitive Dissonance
by LexIsFree inthe cognitive dissonance amongst jws has never been more obvious to me then what i just experience in the last 5 min.
long story short i had a phone conversation w/my mom about some things and i mentioned to her to look up what has been going on with their beloved organization in australia.
brother geoffrey jackson of the holy governing body was caught lying numerous times about several subjects including disassociations & shunning.
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StrongHaiku
CalebInFloroda - But being in the state of denial or simply believing a false doctrine is not the same as "cognitive dissonance."
I would agree. Being in a state of denial or justifying a false doctrine would be more of a response to CD not the CD itself. Denial, justification, etc. are some of the typical responses to resolve the CD.
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Why Me?
by John Aquila indo you ever wonder why out of all the witnesses, you are the one that woke up?
i wonder many times why me.
i know many men and women that are much, much better persons than me; either they are much smarter, more humble, kinder, more successful, or just better persons all around.
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StrongHaiku
Unfortunately my story is not as noble as most. I was disfellowshipped when I was 24 for having a one night relationship with a worldly woman. I was an MS. My mother was anointed. And, at the time I was close to becoming an elder.
It wasn't TTATT that woke me up. It was the fact that I felt so guilty for having sinned that I felt unworthy of forgiveness. I believed for years after I deserved to die at Armageddon. So I stayed out and did not try to get reinstated. Instead I spent my time working hard and learning. And over the years I came to realize the JWs for what they are - i.e. yet another religion that claims to have truth. A dime a dozen...
But over the years things changed. I learned more. I thought more. Being disfellowshipped was the most painful thing that has ever happened to me. And I lost my family and friends. But, if I hadn't been disfellowshipped perhaps I would still be in or lamenting years of wasted time.
I admire those who walk out on principle. I don't have such honor. I got kicked out and never looked back.
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i feel more confused than ever
by BlackWolf inwell i know i've been posting a lot of topics like this lately and i'm sorry if i sound whiny or annoying.
my parents were asking me why i was so upset lately and i ended up just telling them the whole truth.
i told them i don't believe in god or the bible because i don't have any evidence of anything.
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StrongHaiku
BlackWolf, a lot of ex-JWs sometimes get the anxious feeling "what if they're right?" (basically Pascal's wager). You may experience that at times but the more you read and study (as you are doing) the better you will feel.
For what is worth, here is how I deal with it - I DON"T CARE IF THEY ARE RIGHT. The God of the Bible they represent and their Organization is immoral. I'm better than their God (and "his Organization"). And, if he is exists, I'm good with the idea of dying knowing I had the moral high-ground.
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Experiences Of Speaking To Another Awake Witness Without Knowing It
by freemindfade inthis is interesting, i would love to hear of some experiences.
i was speaking with someone offline about their talking to someone and coming to find out that person was waking up/awake too.
the reason i find it interesting, is because it is such a fragile situation, a dance where the two people don't trust each other enough to just speak freely like they are afraid of being turned into the kgb.
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StrongHaiku
I do not envy anyone having to dance around trying to identify each other. Be careful out there.
On a lighter note, I think faders may want to have some sort of secret phrase/counter-phrase or something to identify themselves.
Like that scene in the original "The Andromeda Strain":
Guard: Howdy.
Dutton: Howdy Doody.
Guard: You got the time?
Dutton: My watch stopped at 11:46.
Guard: Darn shame.
Dutton: Must be the heat. -
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JWs are not charitable
by BashfulAshG inhey guys,.
i'm just venting here because obviously, i can vent to no one else because i am still in the congregation.. jws as a whole do nothing to help the poor, the homeless, the sick, the hungry, though some individual jws do.
because they are too busy giving to the gb.
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StrongHaiku
In all the years that I was JW I never did anything for the poor, hungry, destitute "worldly" people except for giving them a Bible Study. I think this is the only "charity" activity the Organization approves and supports. But then again, why would they advocate anything else as "worldly" people are so dehumanized and demonized. After a while, it becomes easier and easier to step over and ignore people that will someday be "bird food". Shameful. I am trying to make up for all those years now. -
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Having One Of Those "Pondering Disassociation" Days :(
by freemindfade inthere are a lot of things that make me have days like this, the utter embarrassment of being are part of a cult that protects child abusers, that enforces emotional brutality through shunning, and that lies constantly.
the lying i can tolerate, the world is built on bullshit, i have a high lie tolerance.
i can ignore it if it has no effect on me etc.
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StrongHaiku
freemindfade - Just had an epiphany, my large, uber dub family is a cult within a cult.So they sustain this thing on two levels. wow..
I totally get what you are saying. My family is structured in a similar way as well. My mother is anointed and has been holding control of (and court over) all of the rest of the family for over 30 years. A cult within a cult...A bubble inside a bubble...