Whats her problem with me?

kbare

Hi just wanted to understand what my aunts problem with me is...

Shes a jw auxillary pioneer or some crap really religious...
when i was about 15 we were really close i lived at her place for a few months.
And through my teenage years we still saw eachother every now and then.

Then i had my son...she never even rang me visited me in hospital or anything, she never even seen my son.Now my sister had a son this year and my aunty goes and sees her all the time buys her things talks on the phone and stuff all the time theyre really great friends.She hasnt even talked to me since i was about 18.

What have i done so wrong?
My sisters the one thats slept with a different guy everyday, been on drugs, done all sorts of 'sinful' stuff which ive done none of...yet im the one that my aunt doesnt even want to know.

I couldnt really give a sh#t about her to be honest...i just wanna know what her f@#ken problem is with me...

What do you think?

Lady Lee

Are you talking about JWs?

If so your aunt might be love-bombing her to keep her in the fold

Lady Lee

Ooops I went back and reread your aunt is a JW.

Yeah I suspect she is counting her time there

kbare

Why

kbare

Why not count her time with me then lol....

Shes probably got a better chance with me then with my sister..

It just makes me feel like she cares more about my sisters son then mine it is a little hurtful to me that she doesnt even want to see my son thats all...why take it out on him if she does have a problem with me.

kbare

Why not count her time with me then lol....

Shes probably got a better chance with me then with my sister..

It just makes me feel like she cares more about my sisters son then mine it is a little hurtful to me that she doesnt even want to see my son thats all...why take it out on him if she does have a problem with me.

rebel8

What her problem with you is you aren't keeping up appearances. Dysfunctional families--which cults are very similar to--take desperate measures to maintain the dysfunction. Change and admission of inconsistencies is what's avoided. They prefer to keep things status quo rather than change things for the better. Admitting your sister is the one with the problem would open up too large a can of worms for them.

mouthy

Maybe she doesnt like it if you swear to much... I am an oldie & when the F's & s, come out of the mouths to the one I am listening to. I turn off . No I am NOT a prude -I love my Grandkids LOTS & they use that often with me. I just say I "aint listening: so clean it up please . Why should I take garbage into my ears/ I dont eat it !!! Just a thought....

Lady Lee

(((kbare)))

My mother has done the same thing with her kids. She favors some over others. But then my mother has always been this way.

What I have grown to learn (the hard way) is that people's bad and hurtful behavior has nothing to do with me whatsoever. It has to do with their own beliefs and dysfunction.

How your aunt treats you and your son has nothing to you with you. But I would say she has a big problem.

I grew up thinking that my mother loved my brothers and sister more because she kept getting rid of me (left me with my abusive father, later put me in foster care and even later set me up in an arranged marriage). It hurt so bad to think I wasn't good enough. The odd thing though is that when she could use me to take care of her kids or listen to her problems I was always good enough.

I was in my 40's when I finally realized I wasn't the problem.

I had two daughters. I bent over backwards trying to make sure I never treated one better than the other. I never wanted one to think I loved the other one more or less than them. Sometimes I went to extremes to the point where I was not considering them as individuals with very different needs and different likes and dislikes.

I understand that it hurts. But her behavior says far more about her than it does you and your son.

jgnat

kbare, you can't make other people be smart or kind or fair. If your auntie decides to show preference to one person over another, it's her loss. Find people who add to your life.

Whats her problem with me?

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