Tonight was the school/service meeting at the kh, and myself and dedpoet drove there at the end of the meeting to see the po. We didn't go in the hall, we just waited outside the gates for the po to come out, then I handed him my letter, saying it was to get things over with and save the necessity of a jc. He didn't ask what it was, I think he knew, especially when he saw dp give me the thumbs up sign, but asked me to reconsider, but I said my mind is made up, I am leaving, and I want it out in the open as soon as possible. He wasn't ready to let it go at that however, and came over to my car to well, almost plead with me to think about what I was doing. I said as far as I am concerned there is nothing to think about, I just want to be left alone to get on with my life now.
He wouldn't let it go at that though, he said that I was "under Trev's (dedpoets) influence", and when I started to think more clearly I would regret the mistake I had made. Actually, I have thought more clearly in the last few weeks than for years, but there's no point telling him that. All this time, Trev had just sat there quietly, but the po turned on him, accusing him of undermining my faith with his "bitterness and twisted views about the truth", Trev just smiled at him, told him that it wasn't the jw beliefs but his attitude that drove most people away, because after all he couldn't help his beliefs, they were decided bu a few old men in Brooklyn, but he could do with working on his personality a bit, maybe seeing about having the operation reversed. (Trev has often said the po must have had a charisma bypass operation at birth lol). The po asked "what operation?", Trev just said never mind, we both laughed, said goodnight and drove off.
Well, that's it, I have brought my life as a jw to an end. I imagine an announcement will be made in the next few weeks, though I won't be there to hear it. I feel liberated tonight, free at last. A few years ago I would never have thought I would ever do this, but I just know it's the right thing to do, so now I have the task of rebuilding my life away from the jws. In truth I have started that already, I got drunk for the first time in many a year the other day, and it felt good at the time, not so good the next morning though lol! Trev is my best friend, and I know I can rely on him, and I am going out with a couple of work colleagues this Friday, so I've made a start. I know it's not going to be easy, but I will survive, and I can even celebrate Christmas this year!
So let the shunning begin, I am OUT of the borg!
Linda