UPDATE: My sister Robin

by Lady Lee 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    I just got back from Montreal. I was there a bit longer than expected this time.

    My granddaughter was christened Megan Elizabeth on Saturday. After the service and the dinner I met with my two daughters to talk about my sister and her recent death.

    My brother in Toronto was holding a similar opportunity in Toronto for some of her friends.

    I read the post I made at My sister Robin RIP Mar. 26, 1963 - Nov. 7, 2005 as we began. Typing it was so much easier than reading it out loud. I had to keep stopping. The words just choked in my throat. It was so hard but after several stops and starts I got through it. I just kept thinking of that beautiful baby I held in my arms earlier that day and all that I missed with Robin.

    A couple of other things came out. My sister had been kidnapped twice.

    The first time was when she was about 4 years old - by her father - the man who sexually abused me - the abuse the elder swept under the rug. He took her for several days before he brought her back and telling my mother that he put a curse on her (My mother was considering bein g baptized or had already been baptized - not sure which). My mother said she believes he abused her during that time. We know he abused his children from his first marriage and he abused my aunt (1 year older than me and the elders hid that one too) Perhaps if they had called the police my sister would have been spared the abuse.

    The second time she was kidnapped she might have been 5. The person who took her was a stranger. She was found a few hours later wandering in another part of the city. Seems he abused her and let her go - thank goodness that he let her go. I remember going to the hospital with my mother to pick her up.

    We never discussed it. Not really discussed it the way it needed to be discussed. She never got any treatment or therapy. It was just one more abuse in our family - one among so many others.

    Robin had a miscarriage many years ago. After it, she was told she could never have any other children. I think this was why being an aunt was so important to her. My daughter told me they went to a club one night and some guys started hitting on them. Well my sister told these guys to buzz off. This was her night to spend with her niece to have fun and no guy was going to get in the way. I could almost see her saying that.

    My youngest daughter also said she spoke to Robin a few years ago. Seems Robin was so proud of me and that I had found a way to survive this family and turn the negatives into something positive and help others.

    She gave me the picture below about 5 years ago.

    alt

    She has been cremated and her ashes will be scattered over the lake that she came to love.

    God Bless You Robin

  • tall penguin
    tall penguin

    Thanks Lady Lee for the update. I'm so happy you were able to connect with some family members and share these memories of Robin. I'm sure it was difficult yet helpful. I'll be thinking of you as you continue through this grieving process. You've been through a lot in this life Lee. You are one strong and very inspiring lady! I'm happy to know you.
    With love and hugs,
    tall penguin

  • BluesBrother
    BluesBrother

    Sorry to read of your sad story, Lady Lee... Lets hope that you continue in the recovery process and our thoughts are with you

  • Es
    Es

    words cannot express how sorry i am for you and your beautiful sis. What horrible things that had happened to her.

    Beautiful photo

    es

  • Bryan
    Bryan

    Thanks for the update Lee. You and your family have been through so much!

    My best,

    Bryan

    Have You Seen My Mother

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    Oh Lee How my heart breaks for you& (ALL) in the family that is so screwed up. Yet the love you have & had for her is so obvious...Get those tears dried up & KNOW she is in a better place (((((HUGS))))

    Grace!!! -I wish I could sent that to Susan but I dont know how .

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Thanks everyone for your continued thoughts

    Grace let her know and I will send it to her

    I sometimes -- OK often -- wonder why I didn't turn out the same as the other kids (all really messed up lives)

    One major difference is that the 3 younger kids always lived with my mother - well until she threw them out.

    I was away from her from the ages of 9 - almost 12 (with my father) and again from 13 to 16 (in foster care)

    The older of the three boys was away from her for that same first period that I was - he was 18 months younger than me. Although we were both with my father who lost custody of us due to him sexually abusing me it seems that might have been a good thing to be with him than with her. He was sent back to our father when he turned 13 (about a year after I was sent to foster care (the 13-16 yr period). He never went back to live with her. But then my father did more damage to him (not sexual but very abusive).

    The really odd thing is that growing up we all knew my father was crazy - a real sociopath. We thought she was the "good parent".

    It wasn't until my early 40's that I began to realize just how toxic she was and continues to be.

    Oh for those who don't know my mother started studying with the JWs after my parents separated. She became the JW. My father was never involved and they lived in different provinces. My sister's father, however, was living with and studying at the same time as my mother.

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow

    Oh LL, she is so beautiful. Just look at that smile. That smile is no ordinary smile. It's one with soul and heart behind it. Did you ever say what happened to her exactly? What caused her death?

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    (((((((((Lady Lee)))))))))) a great big sister with a big heart. I am so sorry you lost your Robin.

    My stepmom was the second oldest of a dozen children. Her mom was selfish and abusive, trained up the children to run the cabin as soon as they could carry a broom. Myrna RAISED those kids, her own brothers and sisters. She did more for them than.... ANYBODY. When she fell in love with my dad, she embraced all of is, his children, too. When she passed away, a whole bunch of us were losing the best mom we ever had.

    I think you're the same for your siblings.

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    At this point it was a drug overdose and suspected suicide. The initial report says she had dozens of drugs in her at the time. So we don't really know yet. The autopsy results won't be released for a couple of months we were told

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit