Verbally abused by a JW - why?

by jaffacake 12 Replies latest jw friends

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  jaffacake

  
  I rang by best mate last night to see if his new job going okay - I had agreed to provide a reference & he got the job.

  He said the job was good. I told him I'd been to my cousin's funeral, which was pretty sad - he was only 46. My JW friend asked me whether I believed the Bible to be the word of God to which I replied yes.

  He started using foul & abusive language about everyone and everything, completely unprovoked. I'm talking dozens of repeated use of the f word and many others. I asked why he was swearing at me and why the anger. He said he had looked at some apostate sites who told lies which I believed.

  I suggested he shouldn't visit such sites if they upset him so much. I suggested we don't discuss religion, that's not why I rang. But he wanted to discuss religion, but again became extremely abusive. He said he had always hated the world, and been mocked all his life whilst an athiest. I replied, not by me your bext friend, so why the abuse for me? He said he had found the truth and I said I was pleased for him if he had such certainty, because I didn't. More swearing but I stayed very calm and asked him not to swear so much. We have been close friends 35 years and never really fallen out before.

  He rang the next morning to apologise, which I accepted. He was going out on 'the work' and needed to say sorry before going preaching to people. I told him to forget the whole incident. He arranged to meet me the next day to watch a football match together, but did not turn up or phone.

  Anybody know what on earth is going on with my newly baptised JW friend?
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  Balsam

  You friend sounds mentally and emotionally unstable. If he was swearing and cussing then that is not in keeping with the JW way of doing things. I have to say that JW have a tendency to attract emotionally unstable people though. Saw that plenty over the 30 years as a JW.

  Balsam
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  Finally-Free

  He said he had looked at some apostate sites who told lies which I believed.

  Maybe, on some level, he realizes the "apostate" sites are not telling lies. Having your entire worldview implode can trigger a lot of rage. That happened with me.

  W
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  John Doe

  He said he had looked at some apostate sites who told lies which I believed.

  Sounds like he may be struggling with self-reflection. Perhaps he's trying to convince himself about something of which he's having doubts? Sometimes people irrationally attack things they fear to be true.
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  Ellie

  If a worldly person swore like that they'd probably be accused of being posessed.
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  bigmouth

  The spirit of Tourettes has entered him at his baptism.Seriously though,the extreme out of character outburst may be indicative of some big stresses going on for him.Keep an eye on his mental health.
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  Odrade

  His real self is furious at being subjugated to this cultish "new personality," and he's taking it out on the only outlet that he feels is safe--YOU. But you do not deserve to be treatted that way, no matter what his issues are. He needs to be called on his bad (unchristian) behavior.
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  vitty

  Did he used to swear before he became a witness ?

  I knew lots who do. Had he been drinking? When ever they misbehave or say things even to each other they need to say sorry and then everything is ok. If by any chance you said your feelings were hurt and that you were not ok, the blame would of been YOUR fault. This is how it works sorry.
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  young hearts, be free..

  You friend sounds mentally and emotionally unstable. If he was swearing and cussing then that is not in keeping with the JW way of doing things. I have to say that JW have a tendency to attract emotionally unstable people though. Saw that plenty over the 30 years as a JW.

  Balsam I agree entirely with Balsam, your mate might have some real issues with his own certainty, or may just havesome problems with his mental health...... Its bloody hard not too, but don't ditch him just yet...............
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  misspeaches

  Wow what an extreme reaction! Perhaps it may be something to do with him feeling guilt for looking up apostate sites. Guilt for associating with someone like yourself. Unfortunately because people are so scared in the organisation to discuss these things they tend to internalise them and then eventually explode.

  I would not be surprised to hear that your friend has some underlying stress issues as well.

  How important is this friendship to you? Can you invest some time into finding out what is going on and help this guy out?