I remember once picking a piece of fruit off some ones tree and getting chewed out for stealing by a more "mature" sister.
Tall Texan once, when very young, reprimanded a co for doing this.
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by TallTexan 25 Replies latest jw experiences
I remember once picking a piece of fruit off some ones tree and getting chewed out for stealing by a more "mature" sister.
Tall Texan once, when very young, reprimanded a co for doing this.
B
I guessed the worst I did in the field service was pad my service. We went, back in the day, on LONG housecalls out in the rural service. We're talking about the Reynolds Ranch, South of Castle Rock, Colorado, and it used to take us 1/2 hour to get out there due to the rough road, the cows, cow guards, etc. to get out there. We would finally get out there, 1/2 hour later, and there was this TINY house, mostly primitive with an old couple living in it. We'd place the magazines with them, have a few pieces of cake, and off we'd go back down that nasty rough road again! We could mark up 2 hours for *that* call, even though the total time spent ministering them was prolly 1/2 hour.
Another place we loved to go was up above Sedalia, Colorado. There were MANY, MANY roads that led up into the mountains with cabins and such. All unmarked. We'd go up there and find all the people we could find, and then leave a brochure, etc.. and then count the time going up into their wild canyons. Just too nuts.
CG -- mountain pioneer
I would pick flowers in the nicer neighborhoods and press them in my bible. :)
However, most of the times I was assigned to neighborhoods most cops didn't want to go into so I didn't try anything funny. Heck, I witnessed a beating one time while in service so I never did any funny business while out in street service. I was more than happy just to pray to god that no one answered the doors.
Forsharry of the "Once was a massive wuss" Class
Nope, I never did anything anti social when I was young, and it would upset me to do something as antisocial as take a piss on somebodys doorstep (sorry I sound like an old fart). Really, I would never do anything that would upset me if it was done to me.
I remember being really embarrased once when I worked with a young brother who told a householder she would be killed at Armageddon cos she had given him the brush off. What a nob he was.
Another time I worked with a girl about my age who had her sisters twin girls with her, aged about 4. She had brought them out without knickers on so that she could lift their dresses any time she wanted to and let them take a piss on the grass or the pavement. It wasnt pretty seeing those littles asses being suspended in mid air while gushes of golden piss ran down the pavement. What a great witness!
One of my buddies would rack you in the balls with his briefcase seconds before the householder opened the door, and yes it was your turn. He's trying not to laugh and your trying not to drop to your knees and spew out your presentation. Householder would just look at you like we were goofs. Another friend would hit on good looking girls, if they answered, and get phone numbers, etc. He would also, pathetically tell the householder during the summer how it was extreeeemly hooooot, and that he was reaaaaaalllly thirsssssssty (yes he would say it just like that - milking it for everything he had). 90% of the time the householder would bring out big glasses of tea or soda and he would continue with his presentation, once again milking it for everything. Usually we only did the one house per street - this really pissed the bookstudy OS off! Worse one was when I was with him at a door that had a security feature (small perforated holes - can't see in but you can see out) and we are talking crap, he's farting, were laughing thinking no one is home (also thinking the door was not open) - well this goes on for 10 minutes (once again miling our time) and we here this, "ahemm, can I help you?" we almost died laughing.
Most of the time we'd just cruise around the neighborhood. I had a small 2dr hatchback and the one friend who enjoyed racking you in the balls would pop the rear hatch window and moon people driving next to us - thank god for limo tint. The only thing you would see was his big white ass hanging out the rear. See, pioneering ain't that bad if you have the right partners! Oh, this same guy would stop at restaurants to use the bathroom and pretend like he was messed up in the head (which he was!) and if there was someone using the urinal next to him (including us) he would piss on there shoes and say that he was sorry, and then do it again until the person went to another urinal. Did the best retard impersonation ever - 99.9% of the time saving him from a wordly ass beating.
LOL! some funny stories! Mine are these: Working with my brother and if he didnt want to do a door and we argued over who's turn it was he'd ring the bell and the walk away knowing I was a sucker and felt compelled to stay! (he's an Elder big wig now ) Another time I was with a mate (pioneer) and we went into this block of flats (apartments for you US people ) and it stunk of piss so we were saying to the people 'glad to find yoUR IN(E)' which had us in fits of laughter so we couldnt do our presentations - making excuses like we had just told eachother a good joke! Other things were another mate was an Elders son and we used to say we were going to a piece of very under worked territory (basically one farm house out in no where) and we'd do this house and the go and buy comics and sweets and sit in the car eating and reading for our time...sigh such happy memories!
My last stand point of "know" return Rockland Massachusetts Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses was malicious in the ministry.
There was sexual harrasment and carrying on in the car group.All innuendo sleazy shit (sister Linda P. has an unbelieving husband who's gonna die at armageddon,so she say's in the car group of 4 sisters and 1 brother (me) that she hopes that jehover gives her a hunky black guy because she hear's they are better endowed)
( Sister fat ass say's she's doing goodie at weight watchers and by the way she's on her period,so i can calculate when her 'horny' day will be)
This shit went on all day after day and i'm suppose to be a dum geek who deserves it,and yes the brothers are ass-wholes too with the sisters.Danny
Sister fat ass say's she's doing goodie at weight watchers and by the way she's on her period,so i can calculate when her 'horny' day will be
My eyes are red and teary from all this laughing! That woman really needs to figure out some better pick up lines--AFAIK any time you mention "period" in a pick up line, there's no way it's gonna succeed.
I knew people who mooned in FS. The same group used to do something they called "apricoting" which involved spreading their butt cheeks r-e-a-l-l-y far apart which reveals the posterior part of the anatomy resembling the inside of an apricot. (picture of me vomiting)
In my group we pretty much just milked the hours until it was late enough for us to go home and pretend to our parents we had done a full day in FS. We went to the mall a lot. Sometimes we'd go to our 24-hr grocery store and flirt with the night crew while counting our time. I didn't turn in the time not spent in actual FS. I wanted the elders to know I wasn't making my time. They didn't seem to care, since I was on the rolls as a regular pioneer for about a year without coming anywhere near the time requirement. I was sent to pioneer school too.
I remember once picking a piece of fruit off some ones tree and getting chewed out for stealing by a more "mature" sister.Tall Texan once, when very young, reprimanded a co for doing this.
Once when I was a JW newbie, I was out in service with the CO when HE plucked a piece of fruit from a householder's tree and started eating it. I questioned whether it was really OK to do that, since the fruit wasn't really ours, and he said, "You must not muzzle the bull when it threshes."