This is my first time actually logging into this website, but i frequently visit often as a guest. I have quite a family history of depression and for some reason this faith attracts soooooooooo many of them. I would encourage your sister to seek counseling and NOT from an elder. Most of these people have absolutely no background in dealing with people who are truelly phsycologically and/ or physically ill. My mother suffered from depression for years and still suffers from it. The elders did nothing to help her and even went out of their way to hurt her. I was once told that she was "weak" and not sick. Get her away from this group as best you can. Talking with a healthcare professional that she can trust and that can help give her an objective point of view on things will make a huge difference. The medicines out there for depression are getting better, but you really begin to see the difference in someone once they are able to learn coping skills and get ahold of themselves. I hope this helps. I am speaking from experience.
My Witness sister is going insane and falling into depression
by free2beme 17 Replies latest jw friends
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LoverOfTruth
What is her husband doing to help? Have you spoken with Him about the situation?
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AlmostAtheist
It's easy to blow off all the health advice you're getting on this thread, but remember your audience. Wacky might be just what she's looking for. And if it allows you to open a dialog with her, it's a good thing.
Maybe take her shopping at one of those natural food stores. Good excuse to get her away from her environment, all in the name of helping her eat healthy. And while you're out, you might as well grab a movie, right? Or go to a mall and get your pictures taken, or do a glamor shots thing.
Not to slam healthy eating, or suggest doing so is "all in your head". Just that even if the original poster thinks it's all baloney, it could still be useful.
Dave
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cyber-sista
Yes, Yes, Yes,
so many JWs on meds, so many with weird unexplained illnessses, chronic fatique, suspicion of parasites, environmental disorders (many allergic to the KH air)
I was also very fatigued as a witness, especially on meeting nights--got a lot more migraines too.
The most intellegnet JWs seemed to be the ones that were suffering the most. One of my closest friend was on 4 prozacs a day--never knew anyone to take that much, but she said that it the only thing that kept her sane, but she really wasn't very sane. she was very kind and loving and was always struggling with the unkindness of the Org and trying to fit it all somehow. You could tell it wasn't in her heart, but she was forcing her mind to believe it.
very sad deal,
cybs
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greendawn
It's the stress of being a JW, everyday you have to put up a struggle to survive the soon to be armageddon and you "know" that everything you do will be for nothing if you slip just once, all is written off, even years of hard spiritual work.
They obviously don't live in a spiritual paradise to have such severe emotional problems. -
serendipity
Hi cbbebop, welcome to the forum!
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free2beme
What is her husband doing to help? ; Have you spoken with Him about the situation?
Her husband spends all his time fishing and working and just accept what ever she says.
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tall penguin
free2beme,
I've been thinking and reflecting on your post for the last few hours. As a jw I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia. These illnesses were real. They were frustrating and debilitating. And it made matters worse to have people point the finger and make me feel that it was "all in my head." What I needed then more than anything was unconditional love and acceptance of what I was feeling.
Within a few years of my diagnosis I had a lightbulb moment where I realized that there was more to my illness than just a compromised immune system or some virus. I realized that there was indeed some emotional basis to my physical symptoms. But I couldn't see that until I was ready to see it. And no one could've made me see it, although if someone had opened up a safe space for me to express what I was going through, it would've made it easier.
Confronting the emotional baggage that causes dis-ease of any sort is not easy. cheezy made reference to the effects of cognitive dissonance, which is very valid here. It takes great courage to look at your life and realize that things may not be as you have long believed them to be. For lack of a better phrase, it's a complete mindf*$k to see that you have allowed yourself to be abused, deceived, taken. If you have the resources in place to support you, that realization can be freeing, albeit still difficult to process. If the resources are not in place, that realization is a shock to your brain and body and can play havoc on your health.
I think the most important thing for your sister is to have a support system in place. I think a firm medical diagnosis is a good place to start. It will allay her basic fears that the worse is happening to her health. Next, she needs some kind of treatment. Meds and some form of therapy are usually the most helpful in cases like these. The challenge though is helping her see that therapy could be useful. For me, I did the meds first and then when I saw for myself that they alone didn't relieve my ills I sought out further help. Again, we only see what we're ready to see.
You're doing a great job as a concerned sister and I'm sure you'll continue to be there for her in whatever way you can. Just please be sure to take care of yourself in the process. Caring for someone who is in the state your sister is in is emotionally and physically draining. Be gentle with yourself.
tall penguin