A Fanatical JW... (page 2)

Goldminer

-would never come to a website like this one

-often says:"I know it's the truth"

Goldminer

jgnat

Has twenty highlighters, high-quality non-bleed, in various colors.

Has their cheap paperback study book laminated and cerlox bound. The study schedule is neatly taped on the inside front cover.

Their watchtowers are fully underlined but unwrinkled (how do they do that?).

Gladly accepts cast-off editions from ageing members.

Reads the Awake! articles in their spare time.

Purchases plastic dust covers for the TMS book and daily reading.

Brings their own wash bucket, chamois cloth and spare toothbrushes for the annual convention centre clean-off.

kittyeatzjdubs

Has twenty highlighters, high-quality non-bleed, in various colors

OMG!!! i actually received highlighters as a gift when i got baptized!!! this looney pioneer sister handed me this beautiful wooden box w/ a pretty design on it (i thought it was a jewelery box) and she was like, ''open it!!''....it was a set of effin' HIGHLIGHTERS!!!! i almost choked on my taco...

luv, jojo

mkr32208

They have so much of the society's litter-ature that their library has it's own gravitational field
They don't just fill out the bottom line on the time card they actually fill in each day and time with placements
When it's part of the "weekly bible reading" they actually READ the names in chronicles...
They've never seen their wife/husband naked with the lights on (with some of these people thats a GOOD thing)
Says superstitions are silly but believes in demons, angels and animated smurf dolls
Leaves tracts as tips
Can never get rid of old bibles as they have no way to dispose of them thats HOLY enough... (yeah dad thats not crazy...)
Tells other people's children that their is no santa, easter bunny, etc and that holidays are evil
never get up to use the bathroom during the meeting or assembly
Never sleep during meetings or assemblies
Don't draw mustaches and glasses on the watchtower cover and illistrations
Always contribute when they GET the liturature and then when some poor fool donates they contribute that too
Don' t feel stupid while praying with a napkin on their head

shark attack

SAME OLD STORY IF IT'S GOOD GOD DID IT IF IT'S BAD SATAN DID IT. BLAH BLAH BLAH.

Hellrider

-Thinks Dr. Phil is "Satan's Little Helper"

Ha ha! Well...if he had a goatee...maybe

Confession

Lotsa beauties, mkr. Everyone really...

--Does not go to "parties." Goes to "get-togethers."

--Does not go to "college." "Takes some classes."

--Believes Jehovah will separate them as a goat if they watch an R-Rated movie.

--Lives with massive guilt for having touched his/her own genitals "improperly."

--Uses a frigging stopwatch to count service time.

hamsterbait

spends the day trying not to think of sex.

dnot think of sex dont think of sex dont think of sex.

HB

lola28

-Believes you can count your time during lunch if you place a Watchtower or an Awake on the table.
-Thinks Bethel is the happiest place on earth
-Thinks it is normal to go out at 5 in the morning and place magazines
-Considers it a privilege to clean the bathroom at a convention

lola

Hellrider

A fanatical JW-dad will...

- Tear out all pages referring to evolution in his kids science-class-book...and then leave it up to the kid to explain it to the teacher.

- Will announce publicly that he and his family are JWs, as loud and clear as possible, in situations like parental meetings at school, etc.

- Will send his kids to school all dressed up in field-service-clothes (briefcase and all) - if he`s gonna pick them up to go door-to-door right after school.

Will show up at school around christmas time, knock on the door (during class!) - wishing to speak to the teacher, concerned about whether his kids are forced to parttake in some satanic christmas ritual, like walking round the christmas tree or make small satanic santa-dolls with cardboard and crayons.

A Fanatical JW...

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