I just told my Dad I am fading.

Forscher

As many of you know, I am a fader. The last meeting I went to was the Memorial a few years ago. Tonight my Dad (not a Dub, never been a Dub, he is a Baptist) called for one of our infrequent hello, goodbyes. Things were never that great between us when I was growing up, but he was particularly uncomfortable with my being a Dub. Since I am the only one in the family who has a stable phone number, or can be reached easily, Dad calls me once in a while to find out how my siblings and I are doing (Dad lives about 1500 miles away).
When he awckwardly wished me a happy holiday, I decided to tell him about my leaving the Dubs, and why I chose fading away. So, we talked awhile about it. I don't know what else to say about it other than I sked him not to let it slip to two of my other siblings since one of them is a Dub and the other has close ties to several elders.
It may not matter much anyway. Over the season, I had a knock on my door. When I opened it, I came face to face with two elders from my last congo. I let them in and we had a slightly awkward conversation where I didn't show any enthusiasm for the idea of going to the meetings. I didn't say anything they could really latch onto, and things didn't degenerate into an inquisition with questions about my loyalty to the FDS. But, considering things I've seen on this forum, I might not be all that surprised at an announcment.
The only way I am likely to find out will be if a family member finds out and cites it as reason to shun me. Then again, I might get another visit of a more confrontational manner preparatory of an annoucnement. As it is, I plan on following the advise I've so freely handed out to others and refuse to meet with a full committee or in any way give them the satisfaction of an acknowledgement of authority over me. That is if it comes to that.
Love to all.
Forscher

blondie

Well, forscher, your dad may open up more now that he knows that barrier isn't there.

I always figured if my loyalty to the WTS was questioned that I would say,

"I am loyal to God and as long as the Society is loyal to God too there will be no problem. As the Bible says, we must obey God as ruler rather than men."

It has worked for me. It's best said just after you have shown them to the door and they are out on the stoop. Say goodbye, wave and shut the door.

Blondie

AlmostAtheist

My dad and I were always close, but we got much closer once Gina and I quit the Watchtower. I hope you can get an improved relationship out of the deal, too.

Dave

serendipity

Hi forscher,

I hope fading continues to work for you and that you get a better relationship with your dad as well. That would be a win, win.

Purza

Forscher:

Was your dad happy that you had faded? I am glad you were able to tell him.

Purza

MsMcDucket

Forscher how long did you have this distant relationship with your dad?

Forscher

Thanks for the replies. I at least hope that relations improve just a bit. I was the only one of the kids to finish highschool, although the rest did get GEDs years later. The ifrst to go to college. The first to get an Associates degree. And the only one so far to get a Bachelor's degree. But, Dad was never that sure how to relate to me because of my involvment with the WTBTS. Maybe he'll be able to unwind a little because of that.
To some extent, our relationship has always been distant. But it became especially akward while I was a Dub. What can I say? I always tried to treat him respectfully. But when you get down to it, we were worlds apart because of the organization. I certainly don't blame him for that.
Forscher

troubled mind

I nearly fell over when I saw your post. I just told my "worldly" father today that I know longer share the JW beliefs that some of the rest of my family does.I asked him to keep it between us for now. He was so happy he had tears in his eyes.Then he was kind of mad because he said," haven't I told you all along that JW's are a cult group." Nobody listens to me, but I've let you kids decide for yourself.... I told him how unhappy I have been for so long, and how anxious I am ,what will happen to the rest of my family .He said don't worry you can always come talk to me.

troubled mind

Forscher , I wish you all the best and I hope you and your Dad will become closer. It may just open a new door for you.

MsMcDucket

Forscher, go mend some fences!

Love, peace, and hair grease! (hiccup) eheh

I just told my Dad I am fading.

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