Advice anyone? On how men think and faithfulness. (page 4)

anewme

Gabriella, I am so happy that you came to this decision to stay true to your husband.
We all smelled a rat in the other gentleman. He sounds troubled.
Your husband on the other hand sounds like a very good man who loves you so much.
No marriage mate strays when there is good communication, laughter and alot of loving!
Make your marriage healthy. Try hard to fill your heart with renewed respect and love for your husband.
Meditate on all his fine attributes. A good husband is a wonderful blessing in this life!

Best wishes to the both of you!!

Anewme

LittleToe

The clues are usually there unless one partner is really obtuse, or in denial.

It's good to hear you have good enough communication in your relationship to discuss it. That's rare, and a real bonus!

doofdaddy

First, Welcome Aphrodite (another Aussie)

Well, I ' ve been in both sides of this picture in my life.

How I see your situation is kinda common if people will be honest. When in a relationship, there can be an attraction to the sad/bad boy (or girl).

Life can be just wonderful with much love but we all have a dark side. The attraction can be so unreasonable but the more we deny, the stronger it becomes. There was something in the bible, proverbs I think, which talks about a stallion on heat. There's no stopping that horse.

So, if your serious about sticking it out with hubby, let this one go. There's no way you can go back to being friends now.

Don't be too hard on yourself as it's natural to be sexually attracted to others, it's just what you do with it that counts.

acadian

I have been married for three years to a really good guy. He's my best friend and confidante. Not the most spontaneous person I have ever met (he says it is because he is very comfortable in the relationship). I can depend on him and can tell him anything.

Do you love him?

I've been married 25 years, not always easy, and sometimes the grass looks greener on the other side,
water your own lawn and see how green it gets.

Sounds like you have a good thing with your husband, don't ruin it.

Acadian

Proteus

I've known a few players, and this brother in-law sounds like one. Good idea to stick with your husband. There's some really good advice here. Don't give up on us guys who are worth it just 'cause there are some creaps out there. We're not always flashy, but we are more valuable.

And Hibiscusfire, I always wash my hands after leaving the bathroom. I even lower the seat.. Mom taught me good.

-Proteus

Golf

Being married for forty three years I think I can give you a few things to think about. First, those who play with fire will eventually get burnt.

Secondly, is it possible for men to have females as friends, yes, however, this person is NOT your friend.

Thirdly, your attitude, "I wish that I could get him out of my mind but I do miss him." Note what James 1:14, 15 says, "But each one is tried and drawn out and enticed by his (their) own desire. Then the desire, when it it has become fertile, gives birth to sin; in turn, sin, when it has beem accomplished, brings forth death."

This man is good looking to you, ask your yourself, how many other women may have the same thoughts?

Who is special to you, your husband or this man you can't get out of your head?

I wish you all the best.

Golf

greendawn

You got your feelings mixed up there one part of you strongly wants the other guy and another strongly resists the idea. My opinion the part that strongly resists is the wiser one so you should give up thinking what that guy thinks or not about you. As your husband said you would have injured him badly if you left him. It's a blind passion to be avoided.

Enigma One

I say go to him. Seek him out. Find where he is.

Then write us and let us know what date the Springer show is airing.

DaveNwisconsin

Men are basicly pigs. Maybe your friend isn't putting out and he thought he could get benifits from you! I like to hear these things because it makes my lifestyle look normal

daystar

tetrapod

I can't count how many times I've debated this with guys.

I'll modify it though. There are exceptions. Everyone here is assuming "just friends" can't include sex, but nothing more. I disagree. I have one girlfriend who I'm "just friends" with for over ten years now. We've had sex with each other on more than one occasion. We're still "just friends" because neither of us will ever be in a relationship with each other. We both know it. We'd strangle each other.

If we were single again at the same time, I don't think either of us would have a problem with a little fun now and again. But her current husband has absolutely nothing to worry about from either me or her. We're adults. We understand what true friendship means and we understand what true love and commitment means. And we understand the value of both.

Advice anyone? On how men think and faithfulness.

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