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DaCheech

I really hate this religion. I feel sorry for all the followers. When I speak to close witness friends, I try to plant seeds..... but no matter how much they agree on me on certain points.... the society is great and individuals are to blame.

I go to meetings, and wind up playing solitaire on my palm pilot secretly to avoid puking at the info

I do parts, ex: #1, Highlights, etc.... I just cut and paste from WT-CDrom.

I go to service, and just throw mags in laundromats hoping someone follows and throws them away!

Don't donate, and really can't talk to anyone at meetings besides sports stuff!

How much longer can I put up with this to avoid loosing my family???

Df'ing in my case would be a one way street.

My wife knows I come here to talk, but she prevents me from going 1 step more

hope you guys can put up with my ramblings, and hope to hear more of you guys.

Hope someone can put an end to this evil slave!!!

All you bethel insiders, please keep us up to date in any way that can help us foresee the morbid traps set aside by the slave,

thanks, daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaacheeeeeeeeeeeech

Legolas

Sorry but....

If you don't live your life as yourself.....What a wasted life!

Alwayshere

Legolas is right! Waisted 33 years of my life. The June 22, 2000 Awake says: " Do not be a victim of Propaganda. Education shows you HOW to think, Propaganda tells you WHAT to think. Educators presents all sides of an issue, Propaganda discourages discussion." So the WTS admits Jehovah's witnesses are a victim to propaganda.

Purza

How much longer can I put up with this to avoid loosing my family???

Besides your wife, is your entire family in the religion? Would you really lose all of them?

Because I can honestly say leaving the JWs was one of the best decisions I made. Yes, I no longer have contact with my parents and some family members, but I feel I am being true to myself and finally living life the way I should have been for years.

The JWs make you feel it is impossible to leave; but you won't know until you try it.

I wish you the best in whatever decision you make.

Purza

jwfacts

You are well and truly on the way out, playing on the palm is a definite sign, I wracked up hundreds of games in my last couple of meeting years, offended some people, but others thought i was taking notes.
I really resent my wasted years. I stopped believing at 25 and hung around till 35, and now am disappointed at how gutless i was, especially since life is far better now.

Boxed elder bugs

I have no moral problem with somebody staying in for the social or family connection but it seems like a mind grinding waste of time and believe me the boredom of the meetings gets worse the less you believe their puke inducing crap which they try to pawn off as deep spirtual information, which of course changes all the time, but you gotta do what seems best for you, life is short but being a witness makes the time go by slow.

DannyBloem

DaCheese,

I 'm more or less in the same situation. I can really nor see much wrong in still being in the organisation. At least when in, you can promote free thinking in your talks or speaking with others.

But yes, the stuff is incredible boring when you do not believe it anymore. (well even for faithfull dubs it is very boring).

About freedom? You are as free as you are in your thoughts.

FairMind

About freedom? You are as free as you are in your thoughts.

Dannybloem, I agree but have found out the hard way that the elders will come down hard on you if you voice certain thoughts.

TheListener

Hey DaCheech. I did what you're doing for several years before I made my final fade. What got me through it? The fact that I had a plan. I knew that I deserved to be happy as much as everyone else deserves it.

I'm lucky. So far, even though my family strongly disagrees with my viewpoints (the little they know), they do agree that I am an adult and have the right to live my life the way I see fit. There is no pressure or shunning occurring - yet. That may all change one day, who knows. I don't let their possible actions or reactions dictate my life (well, for the most part). I'm kind, honest, considerate and yes dammit - lovable.

When I started my journey I didn't know where I would end up. I really still don't. But, I knew then and I still know that I only want to be surrounded by people that love me for who I am and not what I believe.

IMHO you need to think about what you want out of life. You have to decide whether living your life the way you want is more important that living your life the way your family wants. There are always consequences so you must decide carefully, but in the end follow your heart. I found that the relationship I had to my family during my fade wasn't real. It was carefully constructed by me but it wasn't real. I wasn't my real self with them and I feel that it hurt the very relationship I was trying to maintain. The only reason I made it through is because I planned in advance. I let little bits of me out at a time (no jokes). I hit resistance, anger, fear and more feelings from my family each time a new part of me was released. This was followed by a time of adjustment and equilization of our relationships and finally acceptance. I'm not sugarcoating this because certain times are so hard they're almost unbearable. But, I know that my relationship with my family is authentic, real and all me. When we don't have outside pressure from others our family works very well. When WTS guilt enters things get messed up for awhile. But, so far things always settle back into "normal" mode.

OK this got a long longer and more personal than I anticipated. I hope it helps.

IP_SEC

Cheech,

I thought I could keep it up forever, but it became unbearable. There was a "last straw" where I was convinced it would be more bearable to lose everything than to keep up the lie. Eight months later I find that I havent really lost all that much.

Their greatest power is fear. Show them we dont fear their sanctions. If we all did that, I really believe the sanctions would eventually evaporate.

It is hard to stand on ones own two feet eh? It can be done and we are better off for it.

Good luck to ya in any descision you make.

Matt

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