I know I know, I'm so sorry to bug you guys about this but for obvious reasons I can't talk about it with anyone from the congregation and you guys are familiar with the watchtower. In the watchtower, the woman is expected to be 'chaste.' So I'm worried that if I decide to marry someone that is a JW if what I did before will be a problem.
Another concern
by lazuli 24 Replies latest jw friends
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rebel8
Well any reaction could be expected, because they don't always follow their own rules. I think the most likely response would be to ask if you've repented and if you're committed to living the JW lifestyle from this point forward. Of course you can't repent for something you say you didn't do (hint, hint).
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LDH
The best way to avoid this problem is to not marry a JW.
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carla
No need to worry, they will control your entire sex life from here on out. Just shed a few tears, be ever so sorry and it doesn't matter what you did before you were a jw. That was your evil time anyway. Now if you become a jw, all is well and you just might get the lucky number and survive the big A. Only if you work hard enough of course. How hard is hard enough? Doesn't matter, it's never enough.
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one bad apple
all your past experiences mold you into the woman you are today. don't ever let ANY man ever give you crap about your past because it is the past.
You are certainly walking into a world of other issues marrying a JW
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undercover
So I'm worried that if I decide to marry someone that is a JW if what I did before will be a problem.
If you came into the "truth" as an adult, or at least in late teens, whatever you did before shouldn't be held against you.
That's not to say that some brother you get interested in later won't have his own personal hang-ups about it. And that's not so far fetched as some might think. Since a lot of JWs are raised from infancy, those that didn't experiment sexually as a youth, but remained chaste may look down on anyone who has a "history" as not worthy of marriage. That's not a blanket statement about all JWs, but it is concern enough because I've seen that attitude among many of them, my family included.
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greendawn
I don't think they really care if you were sexually active before you became a JW, because you are supposed to repent when you become one, but why bother with a group that has a very dubious history.
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kid-A
If you marry a JW, that will be the very least of your worries, trust me.
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LittleToe
It will be expected that you would be candid about your past with your future spouse, and if you're not a virgin they will also expect you to take an STD test. And no, I'm not kidding.
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Odrade
Yes, it could be a problem. Not fair is it? Something to think about...