Is getting married in Church a DA'able offense? Ping anyone with BOE manual

by Abaddon 34 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    It depends on the Elders, and how much your family want to kick up a stink about it to attempt to make you comply with their wishes. It's that ole control thang again...

    Because you will be participating in the service, they could very well DA you, if the wind blew against your favour. Marrying an "unbeliever" (ROFL - that term so cracks me up with you being agnostic and Kate being more spiritual than a whole hall full of JWs) isn't a DF'ing offense, but the church bit is a no-no.

    Given your aims, regarding keeping the lines of comunication open, personally I'd uninvite them and drop it. What they don't know for sure can't hurt them, hence silence is golden.

    Kinda sux though

  • fleaman uk
    fleaman uk

    bastards should mind their own business.I know that is totally unhelpful..but i wish you all the very best abbaddon.

    Stoopid,dopey religion.

  • BluesBrother
    BluesBrother

    In my experience , yes.

    Many years ago a pioneer brother called Ted became "spiritually sick", dated a worldly woman and without telling the congo, married her in a the biggest church in town. He was disfellowshipped . The funny thing is that she later became a zealous 'sister'. Ted got himself re instated and accompanied her sometimes. He was around the congo, but never took part, plainly a reinstatement of convenience.

    The "Shepherding Book" says under the list of gross sins, p94.

    Apostasy.

    involves supporting or promoting false religion ...
    .Working secularly for a false religious organization would put one in in a position similar to that of one promoting false doctrine....Celebrating a false religious holiday would be similar to performing any other act of false worship

    I am sure that taking part in a wedding and having the vows and prayers and hymns would be considered an "act of false worship"

  • peacefulpete
    peacefulpete

    Yes getting married in a church was a dfing offense as of a couple years ago. The choice of having a religious ceremony and clergy officiating is clearly evidence that you believe the religion is legitamate and has authority in your life.

  • misspeaches
    misspeaches

    Whilst we are on the subject is there anything written in the literature about attending a wedding held in a church. I read your comment earlier Blondie about it not being a disphellowshipping offence but is it frowned upon?

    My mum says that she won't come to my wedding if I get married in a church. (Not that I am planning to but its the principle of the thing.)

  • blondie
    blondie

    Attending a wedding of a non-JW in a church is an individual choice but..........there is always the WTS bugaboo about "stumbling" someone.

    This is one of those times it depends on the attitude of the BOE and JWs in the area.

    Also, it is one thing to go to a wedding in a church of a never been JW friend or family member and going to one and going to one of someone who has been baptized and is inactive. Most likely the issue of a JW going to a wedding of a DA'd or DF'd person in a church or not would be definitely not.

    ***

    w02 5/15 p. 28 Questions From Readers ***

    Would it be advisable for a true Christian to attend a funeral or a wedding in a church?

    Our taking part in any form of false religion is displeasing to Jehovah and must be avoided. (2 Corinthians 6:14-17; Revelation 18:4) A church funeral is a religious service that likely involves a sermon advocating such unscriptural ideas as the immortality of the soul and a heavenly reward for all good people. It may also include such practices as making the sign of the cross and joining in prayer with the priest or minister. Prayers and other religious exercises contrary to Bible teaching may also be a part of a religious wedding ceremony held in a church or elsewhere. Being in a group where everyone else is engaging in a false religious act, a Christian may find it difficult to resist the pressure to join in. How unwise to expose oneself to such pressure!

    What if a Christian feels obligated to attend a funeral or a wedding held in a church? An unbelieving husband, for example, may urge his Christian wife to be with him on such an occasion. Could she join him as a quiet observer? Out of regard for her husband’s wishes, the wife may decide to go with him, being determined not to share in any religious ceremonies. On the other hand, she may decide not to go, reasoning that the emotional pressure of the circumstances could prove to be too much for her, perhaps causing her to compromise godly principles. The decision would be hers to make. She definitely would want to be settled in her heart, having a clean conscience.—1 Timothy 1:19.

    In any case, it would be to her advantage to explain to her husband that she could not conscientiously share in any religious ceremonies or join in the singing of hymns or bow her head when prayer is offered. On the basis of her explanation, he may conclude that his wife’s presence could give rise to a situation that might be unpleasant to him. He may choose to go alone out of love for his wife, respect for her beliefs, or a desire to avoid any embarrassment. But if he insists that she go with him, she might go as a mere observer.

    Not to be overlooked is the effect our attending a service in a religious building might have on fellow believers. Could it injure the conscience of some? Might their resistance to avoid engaging in idolatry be weakened? "Make sure of the more important things," admonishes the apostle Paul, "so that you may be flawless and not be stumbling others up to the day of Christ."—Philippians 1:10.

    If the occasion involves a close fleshly relative, there may be additional family pressures. In any case, a Christian must carefully weigh all the factors involved. Under certain circumstances he or she may conclude that no difficulties would arise from attending a church funeral or wedding as an observer. However, the circumstances may be such that by attending, the likely injury to one’s own conscience or to that of others would outweigh the possible benefits of being present. Whatever the situation, the Christian should make sure that the decision will not interfere with his preserving a good conscience before God and men.

  • THE SHOOTIST
    THE SHOOTIST

    Technically, you could be reproved or disfellowshipped for an attitude. You may think this is absurd, but there is a KM article that elders are instructed to us by the C.O. in certain cases where the sin of wrongdoing is not very clear but the person shows an attitude that condones conduct that could be offensive and detrimental to the flock. As others have clearly posted, if they want to DF you for this church wedding, your goose is cooked.

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    I dealt with an issue like this judicially here goes

    ***

    w81 9/15 p. 30 If a Relative Is Disfellowshiped . . . ***

    If a disfellowshiped relative comes to the Kingdom Hall for the wedding, obviously he could not be in the bridal party there or "give away" the bride. What, though, if there is a wedding feast or reception? This can be a happy social occasion, as it was in Cana when Jesus attended. (John 2:1, 2) But will the disfellowshiped relative be allowed to come or even be invited? If he was going to attend, many Christians, relatives or not, might conclude that they should not be there, to eat and associate with him, in view of Paul’s directions at 1 Corinthians 5:11.

    Apply the principle - you are the groom and geeting married in Babylon the Great - you would be Disfellowshipped

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    *** w74 12/15 p. 767 Questions from Readers ***

    At times an invitation to a wedding may include being actively involved as a member of the bridal party. What if this required participation in certain religious acts? Manifestly one desiring to be pleasing to God could not share in acts of false religion; the person must act in harmony with his Word. But a Christian could explain just how he feels and point out that in no way does he want to mar the joy of the wedding day by being responsible for what might prove to be an embarrassing situation.

    In matters of this nature, Christians must carefully weigh all the factors involved. Under certain circumstances they may conclude that no difficulties would arise if they were to attend as quiet observers. On the other hand, the circumstances may be such that a Christian may reason that likely injury to his conscience or that of others by attending such worldly wedding outweighs the possible benefits of attending. Whatever the situation, the Christian should make sure that his decision will not interfere with his preserving a good conscience before God and men.

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    *** w65 1/15 pp. 60-61 Weddings of Worldly Acquaintances ***

    RELIGIOUS

    CONNECTIONS

    When a wedding ceremony is conducted in a religious building under the oversight of a clergyman, it is usually very closely linked with that religion’s worship. For instance, there may be singing and prayers offered, and in some instances those in attendance may be expected to kneel or perform some other religious acts. In view of what the Bible says, a Christian could not conscientiously join in the prayers offered to a triune god or in any way have a part in the religious exercises of an organization that misrepresents the true God Jehovah and his teachings. What would this situation mean?

    It would mean that a Christian, particularly one participating as a member of the bridal party, would find himself very closely associated with what the Bible shows to be false worship. He would be out of place at such a wedding, perhaps conspicuously so. Everyone else may be performing religious exercises in which it would be an act of apostasy for him to share. (John 4:24) The clergyman, the bride and groom and others in attendance may be embarrassed and even angered by what seems to them the Christian’s extreme disrespect. Under the emotional pressure of the moment can one be sure that he would not compromise? Would he weaken under such pressure and do something that would merit God’s disapproval? Would he be able to determine what actions and movements actually involve false worship so as to avoid them?

    A Christian will, therefore, want to consider carefully the advisability of participating in such a function. He certainly does not want to do anything that will endanger his relationship with Jehovah God. So he will have to decide: Is sharing in a wedding under the supervision of a false religious organization in keeping with God’s command to "flee from idolatry"? Does it harmonize with the injunction: "‘Get out from among them, and separate yourselves,’ says Jehovah, ‘and quit touching the unclean thing’"? A mature

    Sobecause the A word is used you would be disfellowshipped

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