144,000, can someone help me understand this better? (page 3)

silentWatcher

But you can't get it together with him after 14 years? Don't you think you are wasting your time? There are hundreds of thousands of us single blokes out there who can't find decent women.
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Amen, and I recently dropped the decent requirement!

-silent

ballistic

I hope I didn't scare her off. I could have sounded a bit... judgemental.

secretlove

You didn't scare me off. I'm just taking it all in.

Everyone has such good advise but it's very hard to follow. I'm following my heart and it tells me to try to get him to think for himself. The majority of these 14 years I have stayed away from him b/c everytime I see him I want to cry. I feel there is something magnetic between us but the WTS is in the middle screwing with his mind. I so badly want to be with him and make him happy that I can't focus on anything else.

I'm just hoping to learn as much as I can and hope that maybe my little questions here and there will make him think for himself a little.

But I really do appreciate eveyones input!

ballistic

Well, I hope you find what you are looking for. If I sound bitter, you must remember that some of us have been the "victims" of these kind of affairs and worse still, some of us (like me) were thrown out of the witnesses for having sex with their own wife prior to marriage. So... you can imagine how I feel about a cheat who apparently has retained his good standing in the organisation, and is treating his wife so badly. In fact, contrary to common opinion, some of us, (known as apostates) have morals higher than those we left behind.

secretlove

That's very interesting!

I would never want to be the person that breaks up a marriage and I know he is not the type of person who would cheat on his wife with anyone. When it comes to "us" there is too much history and regrets that we both made the wrong decision 14 years ago. We were young, stupid and didn't know what was important in life. I think I've learned... I'm still waiting to see if he did!

jgnat

Well, really, I do think you have an unhealthy attachment to this man. Would you similarly yearn after a man with a gambling addiction, alchohol problem or just a TEENY problem with Meth? Addiction to an abusive religion is not that much different. You could spend the next ten years trying to rescue him if you like, but don't you think at least 90% of the responsibility is his? Here's my three year prescription for mental health:

1. You need to read some books. Maybe something by Margaret Mead. http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/index=books&field-author-exact=Margaret%20Mead&rank=-relevance%2C%2Bavailability%2C-daterank/103-2500870-5559037

2. Find a hubby other than your lover.

3. Divorce your husband.

4. Find a worthy cause that empassions you.

I predict you will find another soul who will sweep you away with his magnetism. Or maybe not. Maybe you will be the magnet and you will stand tall all by your ownsome.

slugga

You really need to see this man for who he really is rather than the man you *think* he is. 14 years have gone past since you really knew him, can you honestly say that you are the same person now that you were 14 years ago?

To ask this man to commit to you means asking him to leave his wife and his religion. With a dub you can't just do that, there are attachments to his family and congregation, some of whom will be his friends. If he dumped his wife to run off with you all his dub friends and family are under obligation to snub him completely. They will completely turn their backs on him and even ignore him if he was to nod a hello to them in the street. What you are asking of him is an enormous thing and from the sound of it something he is not willing to do.

I'd advise you to move on and forget this man, realise somethings are just not meant to be.

Matt

jgnat

2. Find a ~~hubby~~ HOBBY other than your lover. (OOOPS!)

slugga

2. Find a ~~hubby~~ HOBBY other than your lover. (OOOPS!)

You so did that on purpose lol

Hellrider

JW's believe there is a "heavenly class" of 144,000 destined to go to live up in the sky somewhere and an "earthly class" of millions destined to live on a parklike earth wearing smart casual clothes and eating perfect fruit forever and ever and ever..

Ha ha.

I'm following my heart and it tells me to try to get him to think for himself. The majority of these 14 years I have stayed away from him b/c everytime I see him I want to cry. I feel there is something magnetic between us but the WTS is in the middle screwing with his mind. I so badly want to be with him and make him happy that I can't focus on anything else.

Hey. This is not going to happen, unless he wakes up and realizes that the JW-religion is all BS. If he does that, then maybe you have a chance, especially if his wife won`t join in breaking out of the religion. Then he might even get a divorce too. Your main priority should be to make him realize that the religion he believes in is wrong, so you should stick around this forum, you`ll learn a lot.

That said, I don`t think you have much of a chance. If he believes he can commit adultery, and still have a chance of surviving "Armageddon", then he`s to stupid to ever leave that religion.

144,000, can someone help me understand this better?

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