Were you a popular Witness?

by Brigid 66 Replies latest jw friends

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  Brigid

  Jojochan,

  <<Me?...not really.>>

  I find this absolutely unbelievable! I always picture you as the life of the party....I'll bet you're popular now.

  ~Brigid
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  hartstrings

  As a child, I was not popular. I believe it stemmed from my familes standing. My parents were very abusive toward my sisters and I. That scared most of the congregation and therefore they stayed far away from us. When I became an adult, I made it my goal to be "popular." For a short time I was in ther inner circle. I realized that the inner circle was scary crap. Then it hit me that these people were the leaders of the org. We (husband and I) left the inner circle on our own accord and tried to stay unattached from what we saw. Finally, we both faded away. Dh has gone back and I will never set foot in a KH again.

  HS

  And yes, I do think that some people aren't meant to be JWs. Those who actually use critical thinking, those who prefer to live their own lives, and those who have a strong sense of self won't last long. I often think back and wonder if Jehovah saw that spirit in me and therefore deserted me. Then I realize that JW thinking still creeps back into my head and seeks to guilt me into coming back. Scary crap!
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  Think

  Well, i have many single souls inviting me to diner, and trying to kiss me, and marry me, and trying to have sex with me........ was this popular ? I don't know, what you call this, but.... I have to run FAST many times... And i have brothers, that they try to set me up with singles to get me married, and, I saw many times the single poos souls to circle me at kingdom halls like a sharks hungry for meal... well... is this popular ? or whatever you may call IT.
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  FreedomFrog

  
  AA and I were "popular", that is until after we had our first child.

  No, in all honesty, we were popular and some of it may have been because we use to have a Book Study Bull Sh*t in our home. And we made a point to have "treat night" once a month. Our house seemed to always be full with "visiting" ones. Actually, it just dawns on me...we use to set up 30 chairs...and that still wasn't enough on some nights...Yikes! *shudders at the thought*

  FF
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  collegegirl21

  This might sound weird, but I was never popular with the people my age. When I was a teenager since my parents thought I was "too popular" in school and took me out of school, I pioneered and so I was always popular among the older people. They said I have always had the mature mentality. So instead of hanging out with my friends on the weekends, I would hang out with the older people and their babies.
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  Think

  Collegegirl21, You mean, like you hang out with the old farts ? i am sure they LOVED IT !
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  theinfamousone

  I WAS THE KING OF POPULARITY.... even the ones that knew i gave 2 poops (poops is allowed right?) about their stupid religion still loved me... i actually had ppl ask me to sign their yearbooks!! oh yeah... and ppl that didnt know me would be like ur Dave XXXXXXXX right??? and id be like the one and only...

  the infamous one
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  Frog

  Great topic Brigid. I often find myself wondering where all the posters here might have fallen in the strata at the KH back in their day. It's interesting though reading comments, and seeing that there are many just like myself who always felt on the fringes, but since leaving the org have made some amzing friendships, and now have plenty of confidence with who they are.

  Growing up as a dub I knew that my only group of friends at school and the meeting had to be other dub kids. I guess in my stupid childish ignorance I just thought as JW's that we should all be one in the same, and yet I always felt like I was on the outside looking in. I just figured that I must be inheritly shy, or socially inept. One of the only things I noticed in the last few years when entering the KH were the clicks. I was in one of the clickiest of clicks in Melbourne when I faded, all the popular groups were about as overt as they could be. The only thing that kept me remotely attached to them were my sisters, one who belonged to the popular pioneer spiro's, and the other who hung with the beautiful people crowd.

  I never felt that I was one of them, never. It always felt wrong to be there, but naturally I thought then that I must be super subficient in some way (bad "heart" condition and all that jazz!). In hindsight I was most definitely always a square peg in a round hole, not really understanding, or for that matter "getting", what it was that kept those others so tuned into it? I know my niche now, and have come to realise that I stand for and enjoy a great many things in life, very few of which I could have entertained inside the org.

  So to answer your very good question, no I never felt popular, they were all around me, but I wasn't one of them. x
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  XBEHERE

  Yes I was up until recently. Been missing a lot of meetings lately, dont comment much in the stupid elders meetings anymore, come late and try to leave early to all meetings. This is my lame ploy to try and get deleted as an elder, so far hasnt been working but my popularity especially amongst the other elders has gone down drastically. PO used to assign me the local needs every other month back in the day but I havent had it in almost a year now. I also experienced a dip in popularity 10 yrs ago when wifey and I stopped regular pioneering, but immediately started kissing butt to be appointed as a young elder less than a yr later despite having stopped. Ahh the good old days....NOT!
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  Jamelle

  I would not say that I was ever popular. Our congregation had a ton of other girls my age, and the competition for the 3 boys our age was fierce!!! These girls were very interested in their status with the boys and everything seemed to revolve around that.

  I struggled to fit in and struggled to get these girls to like me. I wanted to be the one always invited to parties, etc. This all started for me around the age of 11 and went from there.

  When I was in middle school I started to realize that I didn't LIKE these girls. They were petty and snarky and boring and oh so proud of themselves. During a fight with one of them (over what I don't recall) I was told "I'm an elder's daughter so I know what I'm talking about." Puh-leeese!!!

  During my later teen years I became a groupie - following after another elder's daughter quite a bit. Boy, did she lap it up. I felt that my pride was a trade for my "popularity-by-associate". And I really thought she was my friend, which hurt me later, as it happens.

  Also became close friend's with the PO's daughter. Oddly enough, she turned out to be the worst BA in the whole district. (but that's another story )

  Once I got my first job, once I actually met normal kids - BAM! - I was 'Lil Miss Popularity. I had 5 guys all interested in dating me and several new girl friends. I was in heaven!

  After years of feeling that there must be something wrong with me - at last I was being appreicated and sought after.

  To this day, I have never had difficulty making friends (although I would only count 4 as really close friends). I have never had any trouble in the dating world either - always easy to find a new boyfriend! Of course, I've settled down now.

  All those years where I felt sub-standard are gone and I am very self-confident. I don't miss those people I left behind. I thank God or whoever for letting me escape from them.