2.To leave the Organization and heeping upon myself all the consequences of losing family,
and possibly to lose God's favor and be destroyed by Him?
Will you lose family? True, you might lose family members through shunning, if you leave. It's a fear and control tactic of the religion. Ask yourself, are you being true to yourself by staying and "living a lie?" You won't have to leave all at once, I suggest you talk to a professional counsellor who understands cult dynamics. They will help you keep your balance and find some healthier supports to replace the elders, etc.
Will you lose God's favor? False, you won't lose God's favor. God does not see the Jehovah's Witness religion as being his instrument of truth. Too many lies have been told. Remember, God left Israel, too. Fear of losing favor is a brainwash technique --- used to hold you in fear and a type of religious paralysis which prevents you from using your God-given free will.
Will you be destroyed by God? False. I felt the strongest connection to God after I left the organization. I stopped using the human organization as a "go-between." You might want to read Crisis of Conscience to help you understand this concept.
It will take some time to learn to trust yourself, and empower yourself after giving so much of your power to the congregation elders and a book publishing company that uses its members for free marketing. Right now you are co-dependent with a religion --- with some independent thinking. Your independent thinking is creeping in because the religion no longer serves your highest interests. Perhaps it is time for you to grow wings like the eagle! The eagle does not have to ask God if it can fly. It just knows it can!
Love
ESTEE