G'day rude people,
Brother Gumby is without doubt the most annoying poster in this whole system of things™ He posts long and loud and without fear or favour and he's 'merican too and we all know how annoying that can be.
Yesterday the Apostate News broke the story of Gumby's Kingdom Hall™perversion. Unless Gumby comes clean we will never 'accurately know™' whether his confession was metaphoric anti-typical fulfilment of bible profit seering or just a literal statement of his private depravity.
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APOSTATE TIMES ~ NEWSFLASH Gumby - his pervert confession: ” Sometimes I'd hide in the stall next to the urinal and peek out the crack and watch brothers go pee” |
Personally I think the man's a genius and was really taking a piss at each and every one of us. Consider for a moment the prophetic representative implications of Gumby's disturbing revelation.
The wash room = Bethel's inner sanctum
The cubical = gumby's high tec computer platform/ hiding place
The urinal = the font of watchtower wisdom™,
The drain pipes = the divine channel of communication
The brother relieving himself = the faithful and discreet™ passer of secrets.
Gumby = us curious walking wounded who can't help coming here to sneak a peak at the disgusting thing.
So what will you do when you meet gumby at an apostate bbq?
* Offer him your plate of fruit
* Invite him to come play with your pussy lion
* Smile inanely and think “stinkydick”
* Turn the heat up & melt him on the hot plate
* Drag him off into the bushes to 'work on his gestures™'
* Offer the bugger a free home bible study™
* Other please specify ___________________________________
To the recalcitrant rude grumps of JWD: write any more cruel crud to the righteously outraged gumby and you cunning cold comforteers will rue the day you smeared the mans gumboots!
rude / rud / adj. ruder, rudest. 1. impolite: a rude reply 2. uncouth; without learning, or good taste. 3. rough; harsh 4. roughly built or formed: a rude house.5 unlettered and 'onery. 6. buttock baring, openly flatulent 7. farnarkling
