you wont believe it if I tell you now

by moa 32 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  fairchild

  1. Why are you such a dick in the 1st testament.. I mean, killing babies, raping women, chopping foreskins off, wtf???
  
  2. What's up with Satan? I mean, is your ego so huge as to let him wreak havoc for millenia on us poor humans just to vindicate your sovereignty? As if we didn't know you are all powerful?
  
  3. Why can't you just solve your own problems with disobedient children yourself instead of constructing hugely convoluted dogma to explain it all?
  
  4. Why don't you perform any more miracles? Because it might actually help us to believe you?
  
  5. Where the fuck did you come from? And can you please return there before screwing anything else up?

  Daniel-P, We need to get married ASAP. I have been asking those same questions over and over and over again, especially question number 1 and question number 2.

  Jehovah, Thanks you for posting at JWD, we feel extremely honored with your visit. I was unaware of the fact that you had a computer. When did you create a computer for yourself, and what brand is it? Do you have high speed connection, or just dial-up?

  *gets the popcorn out*
• 

  unclebruce

  Hey guys why get all heavy and gloomy .. lets milk it for all the fun its worth .. this thread got off to a great start.

  unclebruce of the shoot 'em slowly class.
  

  I thought the world was going to end last april or some such shit? How come your still posting?

  
  

  Far be it from me to answer for Jehovah™ GODSWOLLOP Almighty but perhaps the end did come but it was an 'invisible Armageddon™' only observed by those with special eyes spectacles to see How will we ever know if we scare Jehovah back under his rock?

  unc of the idiots serve a purpoise class .
• 

  Clam

  G'day Jehovah. What is it you want us to Witness exactly? I've never been quite sure. There's loads of threads here asking all sorts of questions about you, so maybe you could run through some of them and conclude. Stuff ranging from what kind of underpants you wear to why you throw a wobbler at Jews with foreskins.

  Anyway welcome and thanks for being behind this wonderful concept >>>
• 

  diamondblue1974

  STONE HIM....HE SAID JEHOVAH!
• 

  Clam

  Oh also Jehovah, can you please get their website closed down? Vengeance could be yours .
• 

  Stromboli

  
  I have a statuette of Baby Jesus in my possession.

  If you don't get me the bicycle I asked you, I'll kill him.....
• 

  GermanXJW

  I have heard in some countries there are people giving their children names like "Jehovah".
  
  Is that what your parents did to you?
• 

  jstalin

  Hello, Jehovah. This is Lucifer. Remember me? Dude, it's been a while. You totally need to PM me with your email address!
• 

  onesong

  So Jehovah dude, which are you more proud of, killing 42 kids cause they picked on Elisha or 70,000 innocents because of that bad ass census mistake David made?
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  daniel-p

  This is so typical, Jehovah says something totally ambiguous and then splits. It's like he's afraid of the limelight or something.