Pre-partum/ Post-partum depression......

LDH

Well let's hear it gals. Has either one ever affected you?

I,for one, am having a case of pre-partum blues, specifically because I'm having the pregnancy from hell.

I'm ready to hear any advice y'all have.

Lisa

waiting

Howdy young'un,

Personally, I hated being prego - didn't learn the error of my ways till after #3 however. I think I ate my way through my 3rd pregnancy.

The one thing I did learn, however, was not to lose my sense of humor. Gawd, I was so big with my second, (and 2 weeks overdue) that the jokes *about* me were endless.

One morning I sat on the middle of my bed (1 wk pastdue) just crying, "I'll always be pregnant! The baby's never coming out." I was so big that I would sit crossed-legged and my stomach would rest on the floor like my big ass (just in front.)

My husband looked at me irritated saying "You know that's impossible - it's got to come out." "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, I'm stuck like this for the rest of my life Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa."

He wasn't impressed. I didn't care - I was miserable. Then a week later, the birthpains started (I had complete back labors - swift and horrible) - and *suddenly* I remembered what my first had been like and I remember stupidly thinking "Heeeeeeeey......being pregnant isn't so bad........."

Hope my prego chatter made you smile. The only good thing about pregnancy is that it ends. Oh, and the baby.

waiting

Hey Lisa,

Just saw your response on the stupid prego song - written by a man.

When I was pregnant 3rd time (by accident), my mother commented to my sister (who had 4), "well, she doesn't seem to happy about the baby."

My sister honestly replied, "Were you happy when pregnant with your 3rd?" My mom mumbled something and gave up of the happiness bit.

When I was born folks came from miles around to take a look. They weren't quite sure what the little thing was. WC Fields

Many authorities now feel that WC Fields was right about kids. Robert Byrne

Oh, btw, when I was 20, newly married, and never been pregnant *yet*, I asked a pregnant co-worker what it felt like? "Being fat."

waiting

hungry4life

Well LDH I had to post and commiserate with you, though pregnancy and the post partum period can be tough, adding depression to our list of symptoms can make it ultimately suck!

With my first baby I went from a size 3 to over 176lbs the baby weighed 9 lbs 2 oz ( I eventually got my shape back). Pre partum depression was a way of life for me. Especially with my husband singing the "fatty and skinny went to bed" chant every night and his refusing to have sex with me. "Sorry honey I can't you, just look too different". nice huh? Meanwhile I needed him more than ever (pregnancy hormones do funky things to my sex drive). Well those were
the good times affter the baby was born it got worse. I was a nervous new mom, the baby was tongue tied and couldn't nurse (of course I had no idea at the time). She pushed off my breast and screamed constantly. I felt utterly rejected. Meanwhile she was the apple of her daddy's eye while I was the night servant. The good news is things did get better with time (although it took me 5 years before I wanted to try motherhood again).

The second time around I got up to 186 lbs and the baby weighed 10lbs 4oz. (no c section either). This time around the pregnancy was easier on my body and I knew what to expect (basically no help or support from my husband) which seemed to help alot (hey no hope is better than false hope). I did not work during this pregnancy and my five year old daughter had justed started kindergarten. I sewed and read and walked and learned to take things day by day . I focused on the baby to come not as my ego satisfying super child (poor first borns), but as a precious and mysterious life.
Things went much smoother my child was able to nurse I was back to my size 5 in 6 weeks. At this point I had the confidence to mother both
my daughhters by my own instinct and not that of others. This made all the difference for me.

My youngest just turned 4 and I have not had the desire to have a third child I am content with my life as it is for now. One thing I will consider before having another child is the possibility of depression occuring again. I read in a recent article that they are now finding that depression does not neccesarily occur more during or after pregnancy than at any other time in life. It's just that the combination of having to deal with both a pregnacy or new baby and depression can be overwhelming. (gee that was a no brainer. wonder how much that study cost )

A close friend of mine is pregnant with her 3rd child and is having a hard time. She has been suffering from depression (alot of feelings of anger,anxiety,a short fuse, and she says she feels totally out of control). She went to her doctor and he prescribed Prozac for her. I was horrified at the the thought of medication for a pregnant woman. But we got on the internet and did tons of research and it all seemed pretty positive, even the experiences from women who had already given birth. She began taking it about three months ago and is doing soooo much better. In reality it makes sense that taking medication is better for her and the baby than risking the possibility of suicide( which she now tells me she had been considering). Talk to your
doctor and see what he says, only you know what the various issues are, how you feel and to what extent. No one has the right to judge you (remember we have left those days in the past).

Most of all remember that you are not alone. The fact that you can speak about your feelings puts you heads above the rest (did I mention to you that I had no idea I was depressed , but just felt like a loser). Let me repeat again you are not alone, this is normal, it will get better.

Wishing you the best

LDH

Girls thanks so much.

FYI one of the things that really has me down is the weather. Here in the Central Valley we hit 100's every day for June July and August. My ankles look like watermelons. My left ankle even has stretch marks now! Can you beleive that crap?

I am hanging in there and as it cools off I'll be so much better. I didn't go with hubby to an inportant mixer last night; I felt and looked like crap. I've got about a bajillion funtions to go to in the next two months, I think I'm gonna ask the doctor for some prozac, LOL.

Lisa

safe4kids

Hey Lisa,

My first child was born in September which meant I had to go through the Florida summer, specifically AUGUST 8 mos pregnant. I worked through it too and my ankles and legs looked like they belonged to elephants! It was awful so I do commiserate with you girl!

I suffered postpartum depression with both of my kids but the first time around was the worst. It was such a difficult adjustment and I didn't even realize what I was going through till it was almost over. Good thing tho is that it did eventually end.

Waiting
I remember telling my hubby that same thing...that I would be the first woman in history to stay pregnant forever! LOLOL

Dana

"I undid his head collar and took him outside for a drink, and felt, if not exactly a communion with him, at least an awareness of being a fellow creature on a lonely planet."

Dick Francis in "To The Hilt"

hungry4life

Hi Lisa,
When is your due date? Do you know if it's a boy or girl? You mentioned the central valley, if you mean California then we have lots in common I am in the Sacramento area. My last one was born in July 97 and it was a scorcher. Funny thing is I was just commenting the other day how this is the mildest summer I remember. Is their another central valley in another state or is it just that I'm not pregnant or better yet has my body finally begun to adjust to the heat? Hang in their you have made it through the worst of the temps.

Eyebrow

My ankles and feet are swollen...but the left is bigger than the right. I am thinking of joining the fair when it comes to town as a freak act and cashing in on it.

Sometimes I think I am 15 months pregnant...I swear to god! I feel your pain LDH...especially if it involves charlie horses. I am due in October, but have only gained 3.5 pounds because I was so severly sick in the first and part if the second trimester. maybe I will look at this as a good thing when I try to lose weight after the fetus is jettisoned from my body.

When a woman that has not been pregnant, or a guy asks me what it is like, the first thing I ask them is,"Have you seen the movie Alien?"

This is my third kid...and by far my bitchiest pregnancy. Even my ten year old son politely told me that I am much more of a witch this time than when I was pregnant with his little sister. (Of course, knowing me well, he started the sentence off with "I don't to be mean but...")

The only thing that gets me through many days is knowing that it will end soon and my husband and I will have yet another tax deduction.

waiting

Oh.........it's so nice to remember - and not actually have to go through this with y'all. I'm old and evil by nature, btw. Will make a great grandmother: "Do you know what your mother was really like when a young girl?"

Anyway, I think one of the best jokes I heard was by Roseanne on her show. The men were standing around telling all their football wound stories, playing one-upmanship. She finally says, "Oh yeah?????? Well, try rippin' a cantalope out of yer butt with no pain killers and see how ya feel then, ok????????????????????"

All the men left immediately mumbling about crazy women. Thinking about the picture she was projecting does tend to lend credibility to the crazy part, don'tcha think? Of course, it was a given that we could all figure out that we women are blessed with more than one exit for the cantalope.

Hope all our prego posters are happy campers today?

waiting

Eyebrow

I actually like cantelope...may have to send the hubby to the store for some tonight.

Pre-partum/ Post-partum depression......

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