You really aren't alone, the conditioning that the JW's use as a control mechanism is an easily wielded but incredibly damaging form guilt/fear. You are conditioned to fear everything outside the organisation and to fear stepping outside of the organisation because you will be removed from god's love and die at Armagheddon. It's the same with shunning, if you make waves and argue you will have the love of your family withdrawn and you will be ostracised. You don't believe it all but there's still that nagging doubt of "what if I made the wrong decision" but that will pass as you see wll the holes in what they teach and realise that god wouldn't be that egotistical or petty.
It takes a while to get through, personally I went through what you are going through now and became agnostic, rejecting the JW teachings entirely. I wasn't sure that there was a god, couldn't pray, had a pretty nihilistic view of the future and didn't believe in life after death. As time goes on you reexamine everything and can pick and choose the bits you believe and recognise the bits that are hogwash. In the mean time you feel a bit cut loose and unsure what to believe, don't worry, the feeling passes along with the anger you feel towards the congregation.
Sooner or later you find yourself at peace with yourself, more sure of what you believe and able to examine it all a little more objectively. What conclusions you come to depend on your perspective and your experiences but you will reach a point where you feel more at ease.
Relax and enjoy the journey, it is very liberating
Steve