Finally she told me that I "can't have it both ways" and if I want a relationship with her I have to make some serious changes in my life.
What ever happened to Unconditional love?
Pharisees!
by Good Girl or Bad Girl? 17 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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Dr Jekyll
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cyberdyne systems 101
I'd have to say this was one of the first area's in my mind that started me on the road to leaving. I would hear how the Pharisees acted and how 'we' were not like that and yet it so was. I started to realise the discrepancy of what we are told to what actually happens. In the end I decided this system of worship was no better than that which had been rejected by God (as per the bible).
CS 101
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Good Girl or Bad Girl?
What ever happened to Unconditional love?
That has to be the part that hurts the most, to realize that unconditional love does NOT exist within my family because of our religion.
To tie this back into my original post, another way the elders are just like the pharisees is that they have strict rules about those in your own family you can associate with and those that you can't. My mom was so depressed sounding on the phone yesterday. I sounded that same way only months ago. I wish she could just simplify her life and see that it's not natural to shun your children. But the elders/pharisees make up the rules, not the common folk.
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Noggin
Right off the bat I read about a child getting "counseled" over his hair not being styled correctly and I cringe. I had that only I was age 19 through 21 as a Mormon missionary. Length of hair, what underwear I wore, never allowed to be alone, ever. Constant scripture reading and memorization and singing hymns. That was 2 years of Pharisee boot camp. But I loved it though. I can't deny it. I loved the structure, the reward. I was conditioned from day one to long to go on a mission.
I am interested in this thread to gain more of an insight as to what degree of control is foisted upon the JW membership. Small, large, whatever. More basis for comparison. It's refreshing to see another group of people are dealing with such similar issues.
Noggin
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Good Girl or Bad Girl?
Apparently, today is Good Girl resurrecting her old threads Day. :-D
I just had never read the last post from Noggin and felt compelled to bring this topic up again (although I'm not feeling bitter at the moment and most likely was when I started this).
My friends who are familiar with the Mormon religion often make comparisons to JW's. Is Mormonism considered by some to be a cult too? How about Baptists? I've heard some crazy things about that religion as well...is it a cult?
My friends all have four-year degrees and not many people around my age don't have them, or at least in the city in which I live. It's kind of embarrassing that I only have a two-year degree. It was a shock to one of my friends to hear I had to fight to get that two-year degree, that I paid for it all myself, that I definitely did not receive any emotional support (although my parents allowed me to stay living at home so that is a form of financial support) for what I was doing, that people at the Kingdom Hall (so-called friends) were always making negative comments about how I was wasting my time and should be pioneering. It's such a huge discrepancy; where does it say in the Bible that education is a bad thing?
I don't know how this goes with the rest of what I wrote, but I guess Cathy's letter to the Stevens Point newspaper got me thinking about what aspects of my life would be different had it not been for the elder control in my life. I would have a four-year degree, I would have traveled, I would (possibly) have a tattoo, I would have gotten my navel pierced a long time ago (my sister always said to my mom, "explain to me the difference in one hole in each ear versus one hole in the nose or three holes in the ear. Explain it to me from the scriptures." My mom never could of course), I would maybe actually be good at sports because I would have been on teams in school, I would have socialized outside of school/work with my school/work friends. I mean, yes the Bible says Bad Associations Spoil Useful Habits, but shouldn't it be up to the individual to decide for themselves who is bad association? Every little nitpicky rule these elders make up and talk about in local needs talks make them see more like Pharisees and NOTHING like Jesus.
Rant over. Thanks for your time.
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Finally-Free
Finally she told me that I "can't have it both ways" and if I want a relationship with her I have to make some serious changes in my life.
That can work both ways. Maybe she should make some serious changes in her life if she wants to have a relationship with you.
One thing I never tolerate is ultimatums. If someone makes such a demand from me I flush them like this mornings bowel movement.
W
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Leolaia
I think the Pharisees have gotten a bad rap.
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Pistoff
You are a GOOD girl, GGBG.
As for pharisees, they make the pharisees look liberal.
They have so many rules and guidelines that we don't know about; we really all were baptized under false pretenses. At least I was baptized pre 1985, when it became "spirit-directed organization" instead of father, son and holy spirit.
As for your life, GO FOR IT NOW. I have two sons who are exiting or have exited, one has finished school and the other is going. They love it; it has helped them to feel better about so many things. I still go the occasional meeting to keep up pretenses, but I am fading slowly.
I refuse to shun DF'd ones. Some are quite happy to be shunned, but some are hurting very badly, and I don't believe it is christian, or kind in any way to treat someone who once was so close to us as somehow worse than a "worldly" one.
Such nonsense.
I am glad you bumped this; I am glad you are here.