I just got this

by fullofdoubtnow 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    I just had a phone call from the sister, about 5 minutes ago, and she really wants to see me. She wants to visit me at home tonight! Of course, it is a non - meeting night, I wouldn't expect her to contact me on a meeting night. I asked dedpoet for his opinion, it is his flat, and he was happy for her to come down if she really wants to. He's even promised to be on his best behaviour, which worries me slightly lol. She has promised not to preach to us, I think I made it clear that any attempt to try to "win us back" would fall on deaf ears anyway, and would make for a short visit.

    Anyway, she is coming down here in around 40 minutes, and I am looking forward to seeing her again. I feel I have nothing to lose by having her here, she's the one that would be in trouble if the news of her visit got back to the congregation. Dedpoet commented that it's refreshing to see a jw going outside the wts restrictions and acting like a human being for a change, whatever her reasons, and , as he says, we are on our home turf here, and we call the shots. I don't know, maybe she has a few doubts herself and wants a real insight on life from an ex - jw's perspective. Whatever, I will keep you posted as to how it goes.

    Linda

  • Why Georgia
    Why Georgia

    I think you can be friends or at least friendly with JW's as long as you are not in a angry phase of life.

    I have a friend that I grew up with who I see whenever I go back to California. She knows my husband is a JW and has in the past talked about the "Truth" with me. I explained to her why I don't believe what she does and hope that we can still be friends like we were before I married my husband. She will make a comment about a meeting or assembly from time to time...but I don't see it any differently than my best friend who is Catholic talking about going to mass.

    I know I could not have been friends with my childhood friend when my husband was first fading. She would have gotten a heaping helping of WTS hate if she had said any kind of Witness speak to me.

    Oh well, live and learn...and live and let live if you want to be friends...

    Big hugs,

    Chrystal

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    Well, my friend has been here tonight, in fact she has only just gone, having spent almost 2 hours with us. She didn't try to preach to us at all, I don't even think she had that in mind when she came here, it would be a waste of words on her part anyway. We had a really good talk, and she said a few interesting things. She did tell me how much I am missed by many in the cong, but she made no attempt to invite me back at all.

    She said that she could see how happy I am, and that I wasn't putting on a show for her benefit - my contentment with my current state of affairs is obvious. She has always thought that Trev and I were meant for each other, and is not surprised that we are so happy together. She has always been taught, as I was, that there is no true happiness for those who have had the "truth" and rejected it. She had always believed that, but now she is not so sure.

    Whilst she has not considered leaving the jws, she admitted that some recent events have disturbed her, like the UN connection, child abuse policy, which she knows started me doubting, and the way those in positions of authority use, or in some cases abuse (her words) their power. It seems that a few others have drifted away in the 7 months since I left, and it is the elders attitude that appears to be the result of the problem. She didn't get into specific cases, and I didn't ask, but I can tell she is disturbed, I have known her for far too long not to spot that.

    I mentioned this board, and how much it helped me when I was exiting, and how much it helps me still, and she was interested in what I had to say. She does not own a pc, and has never used the internet, and she has heard some very negative things about boards like this (surprise surprise). She has been told that they are inhabited by rabid apostates who hate all jws and run them down at every opportunity, but I assured her that, generally speaking, although few of us have fond memories of the wts, we aren't as bad as that. Then Trev suggested she look at a few posts with us, and to my total surprise she agreed! We spent about 10 - 15 minutes looking at posts, some anti - jw, and she didn't say much, but I know she was taking some of the information in. She went home just after that, but we are going to keep in touch, and she promised to visit again soon.

    All in all, it was a positive visit which all 3 of us enjoyed, and who knows? Maybe we planted a few seeds tonight, I hope so. Trev reckons that if she does come again and shows further interest in the board, or the other sites I told her about, like Freeminds and Silentlambs, then maybe, just maybe, she is having a few doubts herself, but only time will tell. We are both looking forward to her coming again though, and I rather think she is looking forward to it as well. I will keep posting updates on future contacts with her.

    Linda

  • Cellist
    Cellist

    Wonderful, absolutely wonderful.

    Cellist

  • misspeaches
    misspeaches

    Linda that's wonderful news. It must have been such a big thing for your friend to contact you at all. I'm impressed. I hope that things continue to go along in this same manner!

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