I'm Going To Be Crippled by Age 30!

by Nosferatu 11 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

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  Nosferatu

  Man, this seriously sucks ass. I've had problems with my left knee for as long as I can remember. It's been absolutely horrible for the past few days. Today, I've found myself only able to walk a few steps before I find myself hanging onto the wall and limping like I got caught in a bear trap. The pain is horrible!

  I'm going to back up with where I believe it all *may* have begun. When I was around seven years old, my mother took me to the park in the winter time. They made the whole thing a skating rink. She was sliding me around on the toboggan on the ice. It was fun until I flew into a bridge made out of concrete and smashed my left knee. Mom started dragging me home on the toboggan and threatened to hit me if I didn't stop crying.

  Over the next 13 years, I had really bad problems with my knee popping out of joint. Being a child and learning from the Your Youth book, I thought my problem was called a "cramp", and so I called it that. My mother decided to call it "growing pains". I thought the popping out of joint was normal.

  There were some really bad times when it would happen. One would be when I was running in phys-ed and I'd end up crashing to the ground because of it. The worst was watching TV during lunchtime while sitting on my knees and having it happen. It was painful and I couldn't stand up. My mother thought I was faking it and yelled at me to stand up. I couldn't! I sat like that for half an hour with my knee popped out of joint before my parents finally came and lifted me up.

  When I turned 18, I started noticing the cold weather having an effect on my knee. It would get really stiff, so stiff to the point where I could barely walk. Now, here I am today with some absolutely horrible problems with pain.

  My biggest question is, why the fuck didn't my parents ever take me to the hospital to get it looked at? It's not like I rarely complained about it. I complained about it a lot! Yet, nothing was ever done.

  I'm making an appointment with my doctor to get this goddam thing checked out before it gets even worse. It's terribly painful!
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  candidlynuts

  make that appointment! i know men hate to go to the dr but you do need to go get it looked at and see what needs to be done to stabalize it and alleviate your pain.

  keep us updated. it probably is related to being hurt as a child.
• 

  Finally-Free

  See an orthopedic surgeon ASAP! I've had trouble with both of my knees, and operations on both. In my case, the surgeries were not a big deal - just 3 small incisions each time. I still have some trouble with my left knee, as some bone and cartilage had to be removed because it had been sheared off in a fall. I had to change my line of work to something less physical, and I've had to slow down in my movements so I'm not popping a knee as often - it's been 3 years since the last time.

  W
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  serendipity

  Hi Nos,

  I'm sure the doc can help you out. And please be positive - stop that 'cripple' talk so that it doesn't become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
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  love2Bworldly

  Yes I agree that you need to stop that crippled talk. I am very sorry for all the pain you've been suffering--let us know what the doctor says. You need to see a specialist.
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  Nosferatu

  And please be positive - stop that 'cripple' talk so that it doesn't become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

  Yeah I know, but it can just be so goddam hard to deal with the whole thing.

  The appointment is made for June 15th. Family doctors piss me off because we don't have enough of them in this city, which is why I have to wait a month. On the plus side, he can't give me shit for smoking anymore since I quit.

  It might sound kinda stupid, but I WANT surgery! I want to be able to walk for at least another thirty years.

  I fucking hate my parents for never taking me in. I fucking hate the Watchtower for pushing me into a depressing "woe is me" state instead of taking this whole knee problem into my own hands. It's time it all changed.

  If nothing can be done, I'm gonna make myself a cool cane!
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  mkr32208

  I had to get surgery on my left knee two years ago. They took out most of the cartilage in there and I had to stop working in construction! The state paid for me to go back to school though so every cloud has a silver lining! Go get it checked!
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  Double Edge

  Family doctors piss me off because we don't have enough of them in this city, which is why I have to wait a month

  So much for socialized medicine.... come to the States and get it fixed this week.
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  Nosferatu

  I already have a sit-down job, so it's not really a big deal at work. My concern is trying to do stuff around the house, and doing things with my baby creature after it's born.

  I guess I'm just a tough piece of shit after getting so screwed from life. But no matter how tough you are, pain can still get the best of ya.
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  parakeet

  "It might sound kinda stupid, but I WANT surgery!" ...............In my experience, when someone says he wants surgery, the pain has to be pretty awful. Don't beat yourself up too much about your parents and previous inaction. You're doing something now--concentrate on that. Best of luck.