Engagement party - not invited

cyberdyne systems 101

Ok I'm not at all surprised to not be invited to my sisters engagement party as she is a JW and I'm DF. I was telling my girlfriend about it and she was shocked that as a family member I wouldn't be involved. She already knows that as far as a wedding goes i'll probably be invited to the ceremony but not reception and that i'll be shunned at the kingdom hall, but I think the fact that the engagement is at my parents place she was so surprised that someone is so cut off from family things when in an unapproved status as per the WTS.

Like most people who have never been a witness, they don't realise how mental the whole thing is until they witness it. In fact i have been advised to go to the wedding by posters here to show unbelievers how they treat someone who decides to leave the borganisation.

CS 101

juni

Hi CS101 -

You do what is best for YOU. No one can know all of your history and relationship w/your family and sister.

Good to hear that you do have other friends. Good friends are a true support, aren't they? And they are unconditional w/their love for us.

Juni

Finally-Free

Think of it this way. If you don't go to the engagement party or wedding you don't need to buy a gift either. Someone who shuns you doesn't deserve one. Instead, take yourself and someone you care for out on the town - dinner at a 5 star restaurant, show, etc. Have a good time.

W

sammielee24

to show unbelievers how they treat someone who decides to leave the borganisation

Unfortunately, that doesn't always work. Many Witnesses don't like to appear cold, cruel and heartless or sully the image of Watchtower, thus they go out of their way to be polite and unassuming. This can make it doubly hard for a non Witness to pick out anything strange. We were given letters of non-invites to avoid any verbal communication with family - told via letter not to visit with siblings and parents during a recent funeral. Told not to attend son's wedding...relatives instructed not to give out any information on my new daughter in law including her name, what she looks like and so on. The best way for someone not in the org to learn about the reality of what it is, is to read the stories of those who have escaped and recognize the irreparable damage that has been done and all in the name of - what?

TresHappy

To be shunned is no fun - it's a horrible exercise in power and humiliation. There are many of us who have been through that. An engagement party with a bunch of JW's would probably be the most boring thing on Earth to attend anyway. Consider yourself lucky.

juni

take yourself and someone you care for out on the town - dinner at a 5 star restaurant, show, etc

That sounds like a nice thing to do. Blondie had said that "Over the Hedge" was a cute movie for adults and kids. And of course the X-men movie if you like sci-fi.

Whatever you do have a good time.

Juni

sass_my_frass

Ah screw em. How many of those funless parties have you been to anyway?

If only they knew that shunning achieves the exact opposite outcome to what they are told; they're told that it makes us feel repentant and makes us want to come back... but it actually makes us wonder why we ever liked them in the first place, and happy to be rid of conditional love. The leaders of course know this and don't care; as long as we're not in touch with them, or able to help them out in any way.

Sorry; it hurts though. Keep it together.

buffalosrfree

I wouldn't put up with their b.s., I would show up and be as talkative as possible, just to show em they won't control me, crash the party, do go along with their b.s., You are family and deserve to be there over and above any "conditional friends". Make them look like an ass. Because that's what they are.

unique1

Sorry this is such a tough time for you. Just think this is the best witness your girlfriend can get.

Cabin in the woods

Put on your own party and have your friend join you. Make it as fancy as you want and have some catering!!!

It will be a million times better than than the one that those old stuffed crows are having!

(((((((((hugs to you))))))))))))

Cab

Engagement party - not invited

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