JWfacts
The counsellor I'm seeing has explained it to me this way: The brain is always making connections to the past, to what is already known, and trying to establish patterns. It is a survival mechanism which can be very useful at times, very annoying and frustrating at other times. As JW's, our minds were conditioned, or trained, to think in certain patterns, over a period of many years for some of us. If we want to change those beliefs and substitute new ones we can, but the old patterns are still there. It is a gradual process of building new brain connections. It happens over time. Being aware of the thoughts when they arise is half the battle. The other half is just acknowledging the thought as being part of your previous conditioning (not beating yourself up for still thinking that way). Then consciously letting it go and reminding yourself of your new belief (pattern). It sounds a little corny, I know, but it does work over time. It is just a gradual retraining of the brain. Like forming a new habit.
I find that talking things over with a counsellor is helpful because even though I no longer believe anything the org has to say, after 40 yrs of conditioning, I am constantly falling in to patterns of black or white, all or nothing, thinking as well as perfectionism and guilt in other areas of my life. It is like second nature to me and I don't even realize I'm doing it half the time. So it is helpful to have an objective person to point this out to me when I'm making major life changes.
Check out Lady Lee's threads on "Taking Back Your Life". There's a lot of good stuff in there about mind control. The good news is our minds are really in our own control now!
Cog