Cognitive Dissonance and WT downsizing

by Lady Lee 29 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  What-A-Coincidence

  Also, EXPECTATIONS, the congregation will EXPECT a lot from a Bethelite. I can hear the mothers now: "Can you please talk to my son?" I had a lot of that. I do talk to them but in a way the parents dont expect.

  The returning Bethelites will have more pressure than when they were in Bethel.

  In view of these EXPECTATIONS, I had remember what I learned at BETHEL... IT'S OK TO TURN DOWN AN ASSIGNMENT. I asked myself, "Wac, it's ok not to be an elder, it's ok not to give public talks, it's ok.

  I hoper future former Bethelites are lurking here. Remember, it's ok.

  wac XelderXbethelite
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  JW_Researcher

  Hi WAC,

  You wrote:

  We were BETHELITES, creme de la creme. We had everything done for us - washing, cleaning, meals, no bills (besides the phone bill),

  I used to work on my car at 117 and they would rent me the facilities. Since my car often needed work...I used to have a garage bill. They gave my wife and me $75 a month each and then charged me to pull my car in and change the oil.

  Yes sir, I was definitely the "crème de la crème." :-)
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  daniel-p

  I am an ex-Bethelite, and went through the same depression WAC speaks of, trying to find my identity out of Bethel. Eventually I went back to school and found my strentgh in knowing myself and why I believed certain things. Fast-forward a couple years and the society comes down hard on higher education. Their arguments were complete fooey and they just didn't have any credibility with me anymore. I saw the cracks everywhere. Finally, I went online and did the unthinkable (as Confession did) and typed in "jehovahs witnesses."
  The first thing that I came accross were the apologist's sites which were an immediate turn-off. Too reminiscent of those born-agains I came across so many times out in the ministry. It just didn't have the ring of truth for me. Then I relaized the Bible itself did not have the "ring of truth" to me, either. And then I realized I was comfortable leaving it at that, knowing that if I went on a self-discovery journey, it may very well likely lead me no where, or if anywhere, right back to myself. After the apologists, I came across silentlambs. While the info disturbed me, I knew I couldn't base any decision on another person's experience. I had to get to the fundamentals of my belief, and for that, quotes.watchtower.ca was perfect. It didn't take long for me to cover everything that site had to offer.
  Somewhere along the way I came across JWD and started reading the history of other ex-jw's, most notably, IP_SEC and seattleniceguy. Their stories resonated with me and I knew my experience was not an alien one.
  Nowadays, my mind is relatively calm and settled on the fact that I may never discover the key to the universe, but I'm not sure I want to, either. I don't want to be a person who has every thing and every one classified and catoragized in order to construct a carefully fabricated reality. I don't want to cut off my insatiable thirst for understanding systems.
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  Confession

  Nowadays, my mind is relatively calm and settled on the fact that I may never discover the key to the universe...

  I'm with you, Daniel. It took me awhile to figure it out, but I came to see that the WTS indoctrination is not just that they are the sole channel of communication from God, but that--in the first place--there exists only one organization of humans, being used by God to distribute His truths. This is why most all of us say in the beginning...

  "Okay, so you don't believe this is the Truth. Well what do YOU say is the Truth??"

  The very idea that there might not be one organized, human "channel" seems like such a shocking concept at this stage. For me, it was reading Tom Cabeen's "Does God Work Through an Organization" that really brought me to my senses on this subject.

  For any who still struggle with this, do yourself a favor and read it here...

  http://www.brci.org/Attachments/Org.pdf

  Confession
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  under_believer

  This thread totally delivers. Best thing I've read on here in days.

  Confession:

  "Okay, so you don't believe this is the Truth. Well what do YOU say is the Truth??"

  Every single JW I've tried to talk to about this, discreetly, has said some variant of that. EVERY SINGLE ONE. And I used to say it, though I approached the concept from a different direction. My take on it was: "Sure, the organization is imperfect and has made mistakes, sure they have some incorrect teachings even now, but is there any other organization or religion that is close to the truth?" That "closest to the truth" argument, though it made some Witnesses uncomfortable (since it's supposed to be THE Truth), is what kept me going as a Witness for many years.

  That, right there, is one of the fundamental, most primary, most pernicious of the Society's teachings. Being able to counter that is fundamental. It should be the #1 conversation stopper in the Apostate Reasoning Book.
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  What-A-Coincidence

  I totally agree with daniel-p and confession in their statements.

  Nowadays, my mind is relatively calm and settled on the fact that I may never discover the key to the universe...

  Note: At Bethel, a Bethelite could request to have a "Computer Account" to use the Bethel Internet Computers. Yes, the information was filtered for the obvious, porn and apostacy. They mainly had computer access to send/receive e-mails.

  Now, listen closely, when they go back home, THEY WILL NOT HAVE THIS FILTER. They just maybe, just maybe, will wonder exactly what the Org. was filtering. So in a few, we will be welcoming, hopefully, many, disgruntled WT employees.

  Yeah, I know it sounds kinda WAC
• 

  luna2

  Its easier to dismiss doubts and worries about the WTS when you haven't had a crisis. You can always find some sort of explanation for why other people seemed to have a hard time or were "stumbled" or fell away....they were weak spiritually, they weren't truly meek, they were selfish, they were materialistic, or they were just flat out mistaken. Somehow, though, when it happens to you, the light dawns.

  From what I am hearing, many of the Bethelites being "reassigned" are older people; people who have lived for many years in that controlled, cocooned, institutionalized environment. This is not going to be easy on them. Some may be able to rationalize and accept their poor treatment by Jehobba's board of directors but I've got to believe that for others major cracks will start to appear in their belief system.
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  doinmypart

  
  There will certainly be some cog diss, but this move from Bethel will cause a lot of Bethelites heartache.

  These people haven't lived in the 'real world' and held down secular jobs. Maybe it was just a lot of the Bethelites that I knew, but many of the brothers went to Bethel because of what they could get from it. These are guys that graduated high school, lived at home, pioneered (and maybe held a part time job), until their Bethel application was accepted. Once at Bethel they're fed, get a green handshake every so often, friends & family sending money, play basketball in the evening, and travel up & down the U.S. east coast. As they get a little older and quickly appointed as elders in their congregations, they have sisters fawning over them and in time usually get married.

  Bethelites for the most part have someone to take care of them. If they have to leave and support themselves (and a wife) it is going to be a hard pill to swallow. The Bethelites I know that were kicked out after suffering injury, or wanting to get married & fiancee couldn't get accepted, or released in the recent downsizing are not happy.
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  garybuss

  The struggles described after leaving Bethel service seems the same as the post exit syndrome experienced by institutionalized prisoners upon their release. Now many institutions prioritize a phase out, follow up program, so these people don't disappear through the cracks and have a bad outcome.
  
  
  
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  peacefulpete

  Also an exBethelite. As I recall the congregations generally resented us Bethel boys. Many Bethelites had an air about them, others were takers. Most all took the approach that they were forced to attend their assigned congreagtion whereas they really wanted to go to the 107 and be back in the room and have some sleep or personal time. It was a rare bethelite that truly made the congregation a home and would be missed. I'm sure I alienated my share with come in late and tear out at the first chance to catch the train for the 2 hour ride home. I suspect that many of these Bethel discards will appear superficial and distant.