Panic attacks and Jehovahs Witness!

by Gill 46 Replies latest jw experiences

  • DesertRat
    DesertRat

    I went through a period of very severe panic attacks about eight years ago when I was semi-active & between medications. One hit me during a Public Talk (the subject WAS Armageddon, if I remember correctly), & was so bad that I had to get up & walk outside the Hall. Not one person offered to come to my aid, though they could clearly see my distress.

    Something else which sould have tipped me off was that I prayed to Jehovah as hard as I could (remembering the Scripture that "he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear"--& this WAS more than I could bear!!!), with no relief in sight. I literally sat alone in my mother's car shaking & sweating & crying & trying my best to 'tough it out.' When it was all over she got in the car & said, "Everybody wants to know what happened. What's the matter with you?" DUH!!!

  • south african beef
    south african beef

    While I was a Witto I went through a bad period of having panic attacks.

    I was one of those that if I heard someone else had a panic attack or similar that they should 'pull themselves together' and stop making it up! When I got them myself my perspective changed.

    I must admit that my panic attacks started when I was 'getting romantically involved with someone I shouldn't have'. I was mostly worried about my parents reaction to me leaving the beloved 'troof', and I was 40 at the time!

    I still sometimes get the attacks though at a greatly reduced rate - they happened mostly while I was driving, this was a problem as I do loads of driving for my job.

    Once, when I was reading the Watchtower on the platform I had a massive panic attack and had to go and sit down!

  • Calliope
    Calliope

    <div>i still have panic attacks, definitely not as often as when i was in. but the attacks are possibly due to the fact that i have chosen the fading route, which certainly leads to much anxiety.
    <br></br><br></br>i have something similar to an attack after doing shrooms (but that's an entirely different topic and those are mostly known as "gremlins" - :).
    <br></br><br></br>AND, i had a friend that had panic attacks her whole life. she would black out, shake violently, have a childhood memory, then wake up. no one was ever really around every time she had an "episode"... then at 39, she was finally diagnosed with epilepsy and all the while they weren't panic attacks... interesting eh?</div>

  • Van Gogh
    Van Gogh

    Ominous anxt and imminent doom became a self-fulfilling prophesy within the family I grew up in. They haunted me for years, but only finally manifested themselves as a full-blown state of anxiety after I felt compelled to leave whatever I had held on to till the very last, realizing it had all been for nothing and my God was not there to make sense of it.

    VG

  • juni
    juni

    Heh Desertrat -

    Know that awful feeling. Like someone's hands are around your throat. You just have to get away from people and stuff. No one came to see how you were doing? But they sure wanted the "skinny" from your mom, heh?

    Don't you miss the "lllllove"?

    Have a good day and stay cool.

    Juni

  • moomanchu
    moomanchu

    How feel you?

    Afraid are you?

    See through you we can.

    Fear is the path to the dark side.

    Fear leads to anger.

    Anger leads to hate.

    Hate leads to suffering.

    I sense much fear in JWyou

  • jojochan
    jojochan
    Did you find panicing got worst went you decided to 'step out and away' from the JWs?

    Yes... what was strange is that they never left. From time to time I still get them, but I know now what's wrong. But back two years ago, I did'nt know what was wrong. Whenever I would read something that dealt with unlearning the dogma that I was taught all my childhood I would get sick to my stomach. I would then ask myself, "why?, why am I feeling like this?"

    Then I realised why...I was changing into the real me.And I guess that was why I was afraid.

    I guess I still am. I still get those weeks when my head feels heavy, eyes tight, pulse racing. But at least I know what it is.

    One day at a time, right?

    jojochan.

  • diamondblue1974
    diamondblue1974

    I am not entirely sure whether I suffered from panic attacks whilst a JW but I know through my teenage years I suffered a great deal with depression; especially my mid teens.

    I remember however at a circuit overseers visit he got up on the platform outside of his normal schedule, the speaker introduced him as needing to have a word with us all about some serious developments; the circuit overseer (I forget his name but he was some baldheaded young slimeball) got up and announced that the UN (ironic now thinking about it) had taken measures to ban all religion and that within a week the witnessing work would be banned in the UK. You could cut the atmosphere with a knive; he went on for another 20 minutes, I forget what about but no doubt building more panic and bewilderment into the scenario.

    When he finally said that of course this was a hypothetical (dishonest?) situation everyone gave a sigh of relief and he reinforced that we should be doing more blah blah blah. In my view he was a sadistic prick and enjoyed the power trip he was on but I wont ever forget that day; it was like the beginning of the end. People came to me later and comment on his talk but couldnt understand why I said I didnt enjoy it at all and thought it was sick.

    Typically everyone was out in the ministry effort while he was down and for a good long while afterwards too...I bet profits on sales rose slightly for the circuit as a result.

    After leaving however I would have mini panics for different reasons; such as when I heard about major earthquakes or a new war which was being started etc etc. Its only when you start to become mentally free that you realise that these are implanted mental triggers which as highlighted above, produce the required reaction; panic, urgency etc. It was a battle of wills for many years between my cult mindset and that of my rational and educated mind.

    DB74

  • juni
    juni

    That is one sick person!! It's like yelling "Fire" in a theatre. He thought he was being real cute and clever - the jerk! What if someone would've had a heart attack? That has happened before when someone hears bad news. Seems like a lot of the COs think they can spout unfeeling words and the cong. just has to take it.

    Take care DB.

    Juni

  • diamondblue1974
    diamondblue1974

    He obviously was the sort of maverick CO who thought he could get away with such treatment without criticism; you are right of course...sick to the core.

    DB74

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