by Elsewhere 25 Replies latest jw friends
...my supervisor asked me to drop it. I did the opposite and escalated the incident to the next level and then the next and so on,...
... mention this as it helped me to realize how much I do not trust or respect any authority and never get intimidated, especially when I know I am right.
WORD... that's what I'm talking about... You go girl...
openfire beeotch
No. Not panic. But I do get this strange twitch in my middlefinger that causes it to rise upright even if all the others are at half mast, followed by a strange compulsion to eztend my arm toward the disapprover in what might be called a very unladylike fashion. Maybe that is a manifestation of panic...I can't say for sure.
Respectfully,
AuldSoul
I find that I have a sever over reaction to it in a different way I'm rebellious sulky and insubordinant... Of course I may have been that way as a witness too...
I can totally relate to this.
Although, at least for me, I think it's a combination of the religion, and my family life... which in itself was a product of the religion. I have a really really hard time speaking up for myself. I have a tendency to let stronger personalities steamroll right over me, and I am always in fear of upsetting someone or making them mad at me.
One reason I live far far away from family is for this exact reason. I get a pit in my stomach when I think about being confronted by one of my family members. I could see myself lying rather than standing up for who I am now. It'll be seeing them next summer, and I'm already rehearsing my responses...
I have gotten better though, thanks to spending some time as an Independent Woman (no "attachments" for 2 years), and then marrying a Jersey boy. He's taught me a lot about ...er.... I guess a nice way to put it is... "assertiveness".
Having grown up knowing only those two possible outcomes I find that I tend to become panicked when friends or authority figures express disapproval. It's as if I unconsciously expect the worst possible outcome for the slightest offence.
I do. Since, I've been sick, I'm expecting to get fired or something. I don't know why I won't go to the doctor and get the statement to take some time off. It's like I'm setting myself up or either I'm trying to make everyone else happy. I dunno.
I'm afraid to be happy because I think something bad is going to happen!
Ms. McDuckett..seems like neither one of us can sleep tonight..
But I could have wrote that paragraph a few years ago. I had a lot of nerve trouble in my neck..no Dr could tell me what was wrong or they told me it will get worse...
I finally went on sick leave for several months and used up all my sick time..I finally retired at 59..I couldn't handle the pressure of not knowing if I could return to work or not.I was prescribed therapy for a month and that made it go away for a month. But it came back.
Now I regret retiring..I finally found a Dr that gave me Paxil..and it worked. After a few years of it I was able to stop. I guess the damaged nerve needed to heal. Believe it or not I had a whip lash injury on my JW MIL's riding lawn mower when I was cutting her grass.. it got so bad I couldn't drive for fear of having a spasm in my neck.
And if I am happy..something bad usually happens too..So lets enjoy the "happy" since we will probably pay for it later anyway..
Hugs..Snoozy
And if I am happy..something bad usually happens too..So lets enjoy the "happy" since we will probably pay for it later anyway..
Snoozy, I'll try. I'm almost superstitious this way. I always try to keep it low key. I have to learn how that it's okay to be happy.
I don't get panicked but i do get angry at criticism. I hate anyone criticising or judging me. I was always being counselled over something stupid and trivial and I guess I've grown resentful and hostile towards criticism now.
That might explain the extraordinary fear I have of tram ticket inspectors.
I wasn't a dub for long but I was wondering why the JWs didn't grade their punishments more eg why punish someone that celebrates Birthdays the same as an adulterer that destroyed a family.
