I don't open up much here

by purplesofa 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    I have been lurking / posting here for awhile and kept my distance. I can read hear and sort out all the years of freakiness associated with the Witnesses. The past year and a half has been hell in so many ways.........but would not trade it in for "The Awakening" of myself.

    I have observed so many progress......ithinkisee.....IPSEC........others ...since I first logged on and wondered if I would or could as well. I had such a deep appreciation for what the brothers and sisters have done for me, grew in so many ways since studying the bible.......How could I walk away?

    Bitter End by Dixie Chicks

    The words that you said
    They still ring in my head
    Don't you know
    We say goodbye
    With a tear in our eye
    Oh, where'd you go

    It's alright you can sleep tonight
    Knowing you'll always live on in a song

    Farewell to old friends
    Let's raise a glass to the bitter end
    Farewell to old friends
    Will you be the same when we see you again

    Remember the days
    When we'd laugh as you played
    Who would have known
    The water would come and just take you away
    Oh, where'd you go

    It's not alright
    I can't sleep tonight
    Knowing you should have played on
    On and on

    Farewell to old friends
    Let's raise a glass to the bitter end
    Farewell to old friends
    Will you forgive me when I see you again

    You had a good time
    Drinking all of our wine
    After the show
    We all rode the wave
    Of that crazy parade
    Oh, where'd you go
    What happened to
    The ones we knew
    As long as I'm the shiniest star
    Oh, there you are

    Farewell to old friends
    Let's raise a glass to the bitter end
    Farewell to old friends

    I wrecked my car Friday, hurt my FOOT......my dog died today...........and I fineally came out of the fog I have been in over a year. It happened yesterday..........my stomach became physically ill. A year and half since I have started reading here, the truth for me settled into the me......fineally filtered and saturated me. Skally's post was the clincher. Thanks girl........you march on and persevere. Once I laughed at you and your antics........now I find admiration.

    Ok...........gotta go dig a hole ...........never get a dog bigger than you can dig a hole for.

    purps

    JWs may not fit the entire description of what some describe as a cult but they most definitely are a high mind control group.


    The way that they accomplish this mind control is by doing exactly what is being done to you. Here are their steps toward acquiring total submission from you. Please bear in mind that most JWs do not even recognize this development as total mind control.


    1. The Search. Contact through work, neighbors or door to door preaching. They actually seek and search out those who are searching or down on their luck because those are the most vulnerable and pliable.


    2. The Hook. They discuss world issues and how there is no love or peace anywhere. This makes you feel HOPELESS. Then they add to it that God will destroy the "wicked" or non-believers. This makes you feel SCARED and a sense of PANIC. Then they offer to teach you how to save yourself. This makes you so HAPPY. You have found someone who can help you continue to live!!! Thus, someone who is in a searching mode has just been made to feel even more helpless and fearful and that transition causes one to CLING even closer to the JW, almost as a personal savior. You are now hooked.


    3. Studying. JWs will take many scriptures and fan through the book with great ease. This IMPRESSES you. You instantly say to yourself "wow! they must know what they are talking about". Most of the topics at the start will be simple subjects that are based on common sense and thereby the explanations will ring true with you. This makes you think that they have the "truth". They have now laid the foundation of TRUST. Now that you trust them they will have you take the next step to the meetings.


    4. Meetings. Most meetings are a question and answer meeting. These are based on JW literature only!! (As a side note, please keep in mind that at this point you TRUST them. You do NOT question the literature. You do NOT do your own research. You will not see that much of their literature contains errors in historical dates and events, misquotes from doctors, misrepresentation of science, and the list goes on). Back to the meetings: The literature is read, and questions are asked. The questions are answered by the audience (or in the smaller bookstudies, by someone in the group). The same information is studied OVER AND OVER again. You get to the point where you know the answers before anyone says them. BOREDOM sets in. This is where the DANGER occurs. When the mind becomes bored, it becomes numb. Things you would have normally questioned, are NO LONGER questioned. You ACCEPT everything that is said. It is phrased in such a way to make you think that you are the one reasoning on the scriptures when in fact you have learned everything by rote, memorization, and repetition, all key elements of mind control (or as some term it: brainwashing.)


    5. Door to Door. You will be invited into the ministry work. It will go two ways. If someone slams the door in your face and is rude to you, you will be told THAT is what Jehovah wants. To be persecuted is a SIGN that this the true religion. But wait! If someone listens to you, you will be told THAT is what Jehovah wants. To gain people in the fold is a SIGN that this is the true religion. You will be told that the numbers are growing and THAT is a sign that this is the true religion, YET, you will also be told that the love of the greater number is cooling off and many are leaving, and THAT is a sign that this is the true religion. They TWIST everything to suit their message and to back up that they are the true religion.


    6. Baptism. This is the biggie. This is where everything changes. Where you were given tolerance before for the way you dress and the music you listen to and the movies you watch and the friends you choose, after baptism you will be "admonished" on these things. You will be told that a "true christian" behaves in this way <insert acceptable conduct here> You will no longer have any say in what you do. Just as members are watching and scolding you, you are also encouraged to report on your fellow JW if you notice his/her conduct is not in strict compliance with the JW rules. While this is done under the guise of "keeping the congregation clean" it is really to keep dissention to a minimum. Guilt and Shame are the main motivators at this point. You will be made to feel like you can never do enough. Many sink into depression but they will never show it because it is drilled into them that they are a "happy" people. You learn to DENY your true feelings and FAKE your moods to PROOVE that you are happy. Anything else would make you APPEAR as though you don't have God's spirit and would subject you to their JUDGMENT.


    7. The door closes to research. After you are baptized, you will not be permitted to read any other literature from any other churches or organizations. If you do, you will be disciplined and possibly disfellowshipped. This keeps your mind CLOSED. The only direction you are receiving is from the Watchtower Society. Please keep in mind that you will also be discouraged from reading older issues of the Watchtower. Why? Because they have continually changed their doctrines. The older magazines show you that this organization is not from God, that it reflects the social climate of the times. (A few of my favorites are the articles that, due to racial prejudices that existed in the late 1800s the WT taught that only white people would make it to through Armageddon. It said that darker skinned people would BECOME white. does that sound like something that GOD would direct? There is also another article that claimed that electrical inventions such as the vacuum cleaner were signs that the end was near. ) There were many prophesies that the WT made that did not come true. Yet they ignore the scripture in Deut. that says "if a prophet comes to you in my name and the prophesies do not come true, that prophet is false." They justify all of their WRONG teaching by saying that they are always getting "new light" and that God teaches us things in phases. There are EXCUSES for every wrong teaching they have ever made. You would have to ask yourself, does God direct an organization that needs excuses? As a side note here, JWs MAGNIFY the erroneous teachings of other religions (to make it appear as though they have the truth) and will apply the Deut. scripture to those religions.


    8. The door closes to the truth about the workings within the organization. After you are baptized you will not be permitted to talk with former JWs. You will never know pedophilia and rape are not reported to the authorities but taken care of through “counseling” from the elders. Many are repeat offenders with multiple victims! Husband’s abusing their headship role over their wives, many times in a physical and violent manner. Parents taking their kids away from their non-believing parent never to see them again. Families are totally destroyed by believer vs. non-believer. …..There are just too many to list here. Most witnesses will “poo poo” the behavior of other members once again making EXCUSES saying “Well he/she wasn’t TRULY a witness if they acted that way”. Truth is many of their members are mentally sick. There is no denying it. The elders will cover it up and take matters into their own hands and these jerks are getting a free ride.


    These posts don’t go into great detail. I would suggest that you read some books on the subject: Crisis of Conscience, Awakening of a Jehovah’s Witness, Have you Seen My Mother. These are first hand experiences written with detailed and concise information that is very beneficial.


    Also, contrary to what they teach, there is A LOT of love in the “world”. You just have to be willing to let it in and they do not. They are pessimsitic by nature, finding something wrong with everyone and everything that isn't from the WT.
  • MsMcDucket
    MsMcDucket

    Purplesofa your writings are so eloquent. You must be a poet. I hope that you'll be feeling better soon. Sorry, about the lost of your pet.

  • cyberguy
    cyberguy

    Hugs purplesofa,

    It's because of people like you and your comments that keep me coming to this board. Thanks for sharing! Sorry to hear about your dog!

    Peace!

    Cyber

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    It is a wonderful feeling when the scales begin to fall and that giagantic epiphany strikes isn't it?

    The journey continues after that for a while - some bitter some sweet - but the road is better defined now that the fog is gone.

    Good luck - we have enjoyed seeing you here - you joined the forum about the same time I did I think.

    Look forward to your 'opening up' a bit more here [ your words ] - just be yourself.

    Jeff

  • wednesday
    wednesday


    Purplesofa

    hope your roof is not leakiing also

    really am sorry about your doggie.

    my kitty is old and ill and I think we are going to have to put him down.

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    Hi purplesofa,

    I am so sorry to hear you lost your dog. I am a dog lover myself, they are such wonderful companions. I hope you feel better soon.

    This board is a wonderful place to be, it has helped me so much to be here since I exited the wts, and I am so glad it is helping you too.

    Take care

    Linda

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    Hugs purplesofa, Yes I too am sorry about you dog... But I am happy your out of bondage. See you here again I hope .....Yep Scully helped me lots also ((HUG)

  • Balsam
    Balsam

    Purplesofa,

    Glad you are talking to us now, sorry you suffered so many loses all at once. Think positive and remember love is here for you.

    Balsam

  • sf
    sf

    Dear L,

    I'm very sorry to hear about your beloved dog. I know the pain of that loss. Our pets are so incredibly loyal. Their love for us is unconditional. When they aren't there anymore, it's a bitch. {no pun intended}

    Yea, when I read that EDUCATIONAL TOOL yesterday, I knew I had to get it over here. It was just too packed with info not to do so. Just imagine how many lurkers read it that may now start a more critical search, re-search and analysis.

    Ah yes, the about.com jw chatroom days!! lol!!! Antics? LOL! I was serious to the bone most of the time I logged in there. Sure, I had some fun with the likes of "JUDGEJUDY" {LADYJUDY}, but for the most part, my presence there was serious business. As you now well know.

    It warms my heart to see where you are today in your journey out of the abyss. I see others around the net too that used to go there that used to think I was the most evil apostate to ever hit the net. Incidently, I went there thinking it was exjw chat. Much to my surprise, I was wrong. I felt then, as strongly as I feel now, that confronting jws is better than just bashing them. Although many of you felt I was bashing at the time {maybe i was just a little at times} I was on a mission. I believe I can say now:

    MISSION ACOMPLISHED.

    It's cosmic that you put a Dixie Chick song in this thread as representation of some of what your journey is about. I was just in the kitchen doing kareoke to their new song and realized how powerful the lyrics are to dfed jws and those who have lost family due to this organizations deadly and crippling policies. Forgiveness. Sounds good, yea. But...

    Perhaps you might click that link on where I got the post from and just read some testimonies and maybe add a new board to your support network. Just a thought.

    {{{{{{{{ warm, tight hug }}}}}}}}}}

    Sincerely, sKally

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    Forgive, sounds good.
    Forget, I'm not sure I could.
    They say time heals everything,
    But I'm still waiting

    I'm through, with doubt,
    There's nothing left for me to figure out,
    I've paid a price, and i'll keep paying

    I'm not ready to make nice,
    I'm not ready to back down,
    I'm still mad as hell
    And I don't have time
    To go round and round and round
    It's too late to make it right
    I probably wouldn't if I could
    Cause I'm mad as hell
    Can't bring myself to do what it is
    You think I should

    I know you said
    Why can't you just get over it,
    It turned my whole world around
    and i kind of like it

    I made by bed, and I sleep like a baby,
    With no regrets and I don't mind saying,
    It's a sad sad story
    That a mother will teach her daughter
    that she ought to hate a perfect stranger.
    And how in the world
    Can the words that I said
    Send somebody so over the edge
    That they'd write me a letter
    Saying that I better shut up and sing
    Or my life will be over

    I'm not ready to make nice,
    I'm not ready to back down,
    I'm still mad as hell
    And I don't have time
    To go round and round and round
    It's too late to make it right
    I probably wouldn't if I could
    Cause I'm mad as hell
    Can't bring myself to do what it is
    You think I should

    I'm not ready to make nice,
    I'm not ready to back down,
    I'm still mad as hell
    And I don't have time
    To go round and round and round
    It's too late to make it right
    I probably wouldn't if I could
    Cause I'm mad as hell
    Can't bring myself to do what it is
    You think I should

    Forgive, sounds good.
    Forget, I'm not sure I could.
    They say time heals everything,
    But I'm still waiting

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