did you win the argument, or your ex-mate?

Calliope

okay first, here's my disclaimer:
for those of you who know who i am, this has nothing to do with me.

i was wondering, why does the one experiencing the unrequited love lose out?
what i mean is this, if one party decides they no longer want to pursue said marriage,
why do their feelings precede that of the other party, who wants to continue on in the relationship?

"i no longer want to be with you" said one.
"well, that's too bad, i want to be with you, so you're gonna have to stay", said the other.

hmmmm, who wins this argument?
it would appear, the former wins in 99% of these scenarios (note, i didn't really check statistics).

why?

ballistic

Because you can't make someone love you.

asleif_dufansdottir

"i no longer want to be with you" said one.

"well, that's too bad, i want to be with you, so you're gonna have to stay", said the other.

hmmmm, who wins this argument?

it would appear, the former wins in 99% of these scenarios (note, i didn't really check statistics).

Not in the case of an abusive spouse who says, "I want to be with you and if you leave me I'll kill you"

purplesofa

Turn down the lights;
Turn down the bed.
Turn down these voices
Inside my head.

Lay down with me;
Tell me no lies.
Just hold me close;
Don't patronize.

Don't patronize me.

[Chorus:]
'Cuz I can't make you love me
If you don't.
You can't make your heart feel
Something it won't.
Here in the dark
In these final hours,
I will lay down my heart
And I'll feel the power;
But you won't.
No, you won't.
'Cuz I can't make you love me
If you don't.

I'll close my eyes,
Then I won't see
The love you don't feel
When you're holding me.

Morning will come,
And I'll do what's right;
Just give me till then
To give up this fight.

And I will give up this fight.

by Bonnie Raitt

Calliope

ah yes, love.
but wouldn't one person loving you be enough reason to stay?

i know this makes no sense. but in a mathematical equation, the one with love,
would win over the one without.

note: i am being the devil's advocate (satan asked me, so bear with me).

lonelysheep

i am being the devil's advocate (satan asked me, so bear with me).

lol...I like that!

The one who doesn't want to be with the person would "win" the argument. If the love is gone, why would the mate w/unrequited love want to stay?

Robdar

In most of the US we have a no fault divorce. You cannot force a mate to stay with you if they wish to go--for any reason.

AuldSoul

...but in a mathematical equation, the one with love, would win over the one without.

I think that would be a philisophical equation. The mathematical equations would look like this:

Love + Love = positive relationship

Love + -Love = neutral relationship/no relationship

-Love + Love = neutral relationship/no relationship

-Love + -Love = negative relationship

Find one of the first kinds if you can. The others will make you miserable.

Respectfully,
AuldSoul

Calliope

Love + -Love = neutral relationship/no relationship

-Love + Love = neutral relationship/no relationship

that's it!! that is exactly it.
i kept thinking of it in terms of fractions,
but negative plus positive makes so much more sense.

cal.

freedomlover

:)

you're funny!

did you win the argument, or your ex-mate?

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