I think this is part of the automated / indoctrinated mechanism that cult mind control induces in its followers.
When you hear the member saying negative things about what is happening, it's the "normal personality" doing the talking. If you agree with them that the negatives exist and offer them support, the "cult personality" takes over and becomes defensive.
When I was a JW, I always had these big plans to auxiliary pioneer too. The field service arrangement was at 9:30 am every day at the Kingdom Hall, yet I never seemed to be able to organize myself to go. Yet, on days when I had to get up to work and be at my work station for 9:00 am, it was not a problem. Eventually, I came to understand that my heart was really not into pioneering, and that I was being passive-aggressive and subconsciously finding ways to avoid it.
Maybe some reverse psychology is in order. Like when your daughter says she wants to pioneer, yet you know that she hates field service, say something like, "Pioneering is a big commitment, why not take advantage of the Auxiliary Pioneer service instead? You don't even have to say that you're Auxiliary Pioneering... just try to get the hours in... without committing to the hours. That way you'll get an idea if this is something you want to commit to on a regular basis or on a permanent basis." She won't be able to go on the defensive if you make a suggestion like that. She'll also feel like she's doing what the Elders are "encouraging" her to do. On top of that, she'll see just how difficult the lifestyle is, and how tiring it is to "work" like that all the time, without getting any compensation for it. If she truly does not like Field Service, attempting to get those 50 hours in is going to be torture for her, and a couple of weeks or months of that is all she'll need to realize that it isn't how she wants to spend her time.
