Re: To me Moving out...A very emotional draining day for me.

by stillAwitness 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • stillAwitness
    stillAwitness

    Thank you for the advice everyone ( http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/116754/2.ashx )

    This is my first night with my bf and its still a bit surreal for me. I actually talked to my mother on my way over and it was the first time I think ever that her and I had a real heart to heart mother/daughter talk.

    She said she supports me and feels like if this is what I need to do right now then she is there for me. She never even once brought up the elders (but did say make sure I stick to Jehovah) and even said that she decided she would let me keep the car. (The whole time I was wondering: "who is this lady and what has she done with my mother!" )

    Long story short...I told her I had found a roomate (female of course) and I just needed to finally be on my own. I don't think I cried so much in my life. The lines of communication between my mom and I have actually been opened now and I am supposed to see her next week. But I am terrified of how her tone may change after the elders know about the situation (don't think they do as of yet) and wether or not they will want to meet with me and if they do what do I say?

    Its also weird b/c now I wonder if I made the right decision. I keep thinking how my parents will be alone in the house now and maybe I could of waited a bit longer...its just bit a very emotional draining day for me. Thank you everyone for your support.

  • damselfly
    damselfly

    I would imagine you are in shock over the whole thing.

    AS far as the elders go, they only have to know what you want them to know.

    If you've told your mom you've got a female roommate, then that's probably what you should tell them IF you decide to tell them anything.

    You can break the mindset that they are intitled to know personal details, they aren't, and the quicker you can stop thinking that way the better off you will be.


    best of luck hon and keep us posted, we're rooting for you.

    <3 Dams

  • Highlander
    Highlander

    (The whole time I was wondering: "who is this lady and what has she done with my mother!" )

    That's simple. Her previous technique of being a hard ass, has failed, and this is a last ditch effort to manipulate and control you.

    By behaving this way, she now has you questioning the decision that you've made. Don't let her current passive agressive behavior dictate your life.

    If you were to change your mind and go back, it will soon be the same old thing again.

    You made the right choice by beginning an adult life.

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    i have gone through something very similar with my daughter recently.

    I hope you are your mom get through this .......its growing pains.........I have learned so much about love going through this with her.

    we all think things should be a certain way.......it takes time to adjust for everyone.

    I refused to lose my daughter.......and I am sure your mom will feel the same way.

    ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

    you are a wonderful young lady

    I am proud of you

    purps

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    (( stilla ))

    I dread the day I have to "push" my little chick out of the nest, but it's necessary - for both of us.

    Though it may be an adjustment, you'll make it, as will your parents.

  • anewme
    anewme

    I feel for you. I agree this is a weird day for you. But you will best judge what kind of day it is as events unfold for you in the future.

    Best wishes Stilla,


    Anewme

  • looking_glass
    looking_glass
    I wonder if I made the right decision

    Yes, you did the right thing. It is in the rare moments of kindness that our JW parents show to us, we have a tendency to break down and think we are the bad guys. This is your first step in the right direction. Good on you.

  • CountryGuy
    CountryGuy

    Good luck! I know you'll do great!

    CountryGuy

  • LDH
    LDH

    You did it!

    your post also touched on the fact that now your parents will be alone with their thoughts and each other......any loyal Jdub parent with a child your age NEVER expected you to leave home, why the end was supposed to come when you were just a baby.

    They will now hear the sounds of the crickets chirping as they wonder how this happened?

    Lisa

  • Confession
    Confession

    Stilla, you've taken an important step. There might be some "bumps," but I predict that you are going to feel more free and authentic than ever before in your life. You are taking charge of your life.

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