the baptists around here dont drink alcohol.
enough to put most ex jw's off of their religion lol
the lutherans around here however...i hear they have great potluck and great booze LOL
From one cult to another
by JH 21 Replies latest jw friends
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kls
If and when this were to happen , just tell your mom you just got out of a cult( religion) and you would rather not . Tell her how you feel ,and if your mom loves you as i am sure she does, she will let you lead your own life like she always has.
Don't worry till it happens
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SPAZnik
Have you suggested a book club, or some other non religious club/hobby?
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Brymichmom
Be sure and read articles on what defines a cult. Usually Baptists aren't cultic; however, some churches can be very high control, but just being a member of a Baptist church wouldn't necessarily mean that the person is in a cult. Here are a couple of good articles: http://freeminds.org/psych/lifton.htm http://www.freedomofmind.com/resourcecenter/faq/ You might familiarize yourself with those articles and see if the Baptist group that your mother is involved with meets any of this criteria for being a cult.
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delilah
I understand your fears, JH....just be there for her,( like I know you will be ), and cross that bridge when you come to it.
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carla
From what I know of Baptist they are individual churches and are allowed to disagree with the pastor and each other, in general. On a whole they subscribe to the basics of Christianity, trinity, diety of Christ, work on the cross and forgiveness of sins, pretty much mainstream Christianity. It's various points they certainly allow and I think encourage discussion (at times heated even) on matters that are not 'salvation issues'. That said there are a few cults using the Baptist name such as the one in the US that is currently picketing soldiers funerals. Their reason? Because the US allows homosexuallity. That group is run by an older familly member, nearly all members are related.
In the Baptist churches (and all mainstream that I know of) you can leave anytime and there will be no repurcussions if you do. They will still welcome you, have dinner, whatever with you. They do not shun. I have heard of very strict Baptist churches and others are more liberal.
Your mom will have big hole to fill. She will be losing her husband of many years and her role in life as wife, and now caretaker. She will question who she is now and what is her 'job'. She needs to be needed. Tell her your worries and how the cult life affected you and others here if you have not done so yet.
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looking_glass
I think that some others have pointed this out as well, there is mainstream Baptists and then there is the fire and brimstone baptist. I know down south there are tons of different types of Baptists, freewill missionary, missionary, etc., and each of these believes a little different from the next.
I feel for your mom. I can only imagine how frightening it must feel, the thought of losing your husband after a long time together and all your children are grown and gone with their own families. She is probably just seeking friendship. If you are afraid they are going to steal her free time, I agree with the person who recommended a book club. There is always volunteering at places. That can help as well.
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Apostate Kate
I agree with many posters who already said that most Baptists are not cultic. You can watch Charles Stanly on TV, "In Touch" one of the very few preachers who are not actual "televangelists" creeps. I'm pretty sure he is Baptist. "Love Worth Finding" with Adrian Rogers is also Baptist I think so you can watch a show to get an idea of what most Baptist services are like.
Most Baptists teach unconditional love, charity, all good things. They would never encourage your mother to pressure you in any way. Your mom knows that she will have a big empty spot when that day comes, and becoming a member of a healthy church is a good thing. They are not all bad.
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Apostate Kate
{{{{{{{{{JH}}}}}}}}}}
Just wanted to add that my thoughts are with you as you go through this trying time with your father.
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anewme
JH, I too think the Baptists might be a good help to your mom after your dad passes. They have a tight social network and teach a hope for ressurrection (which your mom will love) AND YOUR SISTER AND HER KIDS ARE THERE TOO! I see it as a unifying of your family.
Your role could be supportive son. You will be the honored guest at her church for special services when they have them. Over time they will come to love you as their own and yet you are not a member. Your mother will shine when you accompany her to a luncheon or get together. She will need the lady friends she will make among the church women. As she grows older it will be a healthy association for her and bring your sister much happiness too.
I say let it be. Its not your thing. (Its not my thing either) My husband and I accompany his mom to her church for the big events Christmas carolling (mom sings) and the annual Easter re-enactment of the crucifixion (tasteful thank god!) And can these church ladies cook! OMG!!! JH you are going to love their pot lucks and Love Luncheons!!!!
As Martha Stewart coined the phrase "Its a good thing, JH"