my bethel servise left me seriously depressed!!!! (page 3)

caligirl

Welcome to the board - Sorry you are having a rough time.

I'm assuming you are male.

1) Do not get married if you are not in a position to support your family. Do you have any idea the stress in a marriage when there is not money to meet basic necessities? How bout adding a child to the equation of no money? You owe it to yourself and your fiance to be able to support your family.

2) Run, don't walk, to your nearest community college and sign up for classes. It sounds like you have interest in something medical, and there is always something available in the medical field.

3) Go apply for a job..any job..get out and meet people. There are countless jobs out there that are available to anyone. Anyone can make hamburgers or bag groceries. There is no job that is beneath you. You have a responsibility to take care of yourself. There is nothing wrong with being afraid as long as your fear does not stop you from doing what you must do. You have been out of the real world by being at Bethel. I would imagine it is a shocker to be kicked to the curb without so much as a thank you for all of the personal sacrifices that you have made to volunteer there. Stop isolating yourself to the congregation. They are not going to help you pay your rent or feed yourself.

4) Go to a doctor and talk to them about anti-depressants. It is no wonder that you are depressed after your experience. Counseling is not a bad idea either.

Your post strongly suggests that you are at war with yourself. You have seen the inner workings, and you are seem dismayed at what you have seen, and it is no wonder. It is a shock to see the reality up close when you have been taught the fantasy all of your life. It causes no small amount of mental distress to have those contrasts thrown in your face like you have had by working at Bethel. At the same time, you still want to believe that the world of the witnesses is as perfect as you have always been taught. The truth about what it all really is is very hard to reconcile with what you always thought it was supposed to be. I am sorry for your experiences, but I hope that you use it as a wake up call to do something with your life and not count on God to destroy the world soon to solve all of your problems. God helps those who help themselves. The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm. Best wishes to you, and I hope that your life gets better.

Caligirl

xcaliber

it is true that the new world translation is the main bible that I use for my study, but it is one of the few translations that did not have gods name Jehovah taken out of it. And in all my years of knocking on doors I have never meet one person that could pick up any bible and prove that my beleifs were wrong, and I am more then willing to listen.

Seeker4

Xcal:

You have done very little research on the JWs or the Bible. Unless you are a non-English speaker, and maybe even if you are, your posts indicate you have a limited education. You are a survivor of a cult. Racism at Bethel is just the beginning of the problems you'll find with JWs.

Please follow the advice above. You need to start making a new life for yourself and getting out of the Witnesses is just the start for you. The "reasons" you give for feeling that JWs have the most accurate religion has nothing to do with your "research." It's simply what you've been told all your life and you believe it.

Now is a good time for you to make some serious changes for the better in your life. Stick around here and you'll learn a lot!

S4

thecarpenter

Hello xcaliber, and welcome to the discussion board.

I used to feel the same way as you do about the organization. What you have to do is commit yourself to learning both sides of a issue or teaching before you commit yourself to a belief. You will find that truth isn't always as black and white as it seems. Make a commitment to learn both sides of a issue first without prejudging. Check out Freeminds.org

Another thing you have to do is stop being a victum in your own mind. You made the decision to go to bethel. You made the decision not to go to school. You are making the decision to get married right away. You are in control of your life, not the watchtower. If you feel they are overly influencing you, then you may have to make the decision on how much influence they have on you. Start taking responsibility on how your life works out. It will be tough but everyone goes through it. You are still young and have plenty of good years ahead of you. Don't sabotage yourself by cultivating a victums mentality.

Keep checking out this board and it will help you understand many things that the watchtower does that they don't want the friends to know.

xcaliber

I dont need to write down names of people and what happend, I will never forget what has happend. And if ever I get the oportunity I will take legal action against those responsible because I dont think rasist people are christians so it realy would not be like I was fileing a law suite against a fello christian. But please some body tell me this, some one said know body is benefiting from the organiztion but those on top, how is that possible Everyone at the head quarters in bethel is a volunteer knowbody gets paid a dime. So why was it that while at bethel some people had 2006 cadilac's and BMW,s and in there rooms had entertainment systems big televisions and these were mostly the people that had been there 10 years or more. Wouldent the people that have been there the longest be the least likely to have money, because they have not reseived income for so long. how is it posible you can volunteer for 8 hours every day of the week and 5 hours on saturday, but still drive a 2006 cadilac????? I want to know so I can get one.

MegaDude

how is it posible you can volunteer for 8 hours every day of the week and 5 hours on saturday, but still drive a 2006 cadilac????? I want to know so I can get one.

ha ha.

you would know that if you had really been at Bethel, troll.

xcaliber

I know that people are given cars as gifts by other rich members of the organization, and I know about the very expensive things people donate to bethel, those things are given only to those that have spent many years there.But while I was at bethel I was actualy working hard. It was only after I was asked to leave and experienced discrimination that I began to think about obtaining matterial things for my self. so yes I was REALY at bethel but my focus at the time was not obtaining what others had.

serendipity

Hi xcalibur and welcome!

I'm sorry you faced discrimination. That must be really disillusioning because Jehovah's people are not supposed to be racist. Your first priority needs to be to get some training to support yourself and later a family. There are student loans available and you can consider community college for at least part of your training, if that's applicable.

You may want to file a lawsuit, but that costs money. If you don't have money right now, it is best to just write down all the information you can, including names, dates and times, witnesses to the event, etc. You rememer this stuff right now, but in two or three years, when you have money to pursue a lawsuit, you may forget some little detail and that will cast doubt on all your other statements.

You also need to know that the Society has lawyers who will work very hard to discredit you because you would be considered a traitor for filing a lawsuit. Look up "theocratic warfare strategy" on the Watchtower Library CD. The society won't hesitate to lie because they don't think that the worldy court systems deserve to know the truth. You need to know what you're up against here so you don't waste time and money thinking you'll get the wrongs righted.

If you feel wronged, take this to God in prayer and ask for direction and endurance. As JWs we thought persecution came from the outside, but in reality it more often came from the inside. That's where long suffering comes into play.

You'll have to take charge of your life from this point on. I wish you the best.

SPAZnik

To paraphrase the bible you express belief in, 'the whole law comes down to Love'.

It does not say by their preaching work you will know them,
it does not say by their anti-trinity policy you will know them,
it does not say by their number of seats in heaven you will know them.
it does not say by having people wash up to the elbows you will know them.

It says "by their LOVE you will know them".

How is the JW organization LOVING if as you say are suffering racism?
How is it loving for them to just dump you on the outside after your
years of "servise"?
And if it's genuinely guided by God's Holy Spirit, and these things are happening to you in Bethel, the house of god, then God is a racist, no?

A wise guy once said " man makes god in his image ". Think about that. Everywhere you go, humanity has some form of god that suits their needs.
Including the JWs. By your account, it's okay with their god if they dump you on the street penniless, jobless and uneducated after years of service.

In all your studying to get closer to god, did you notice that god rested?
Get some sleep. (Do you at least get more sleep now that you are not at Bethel?)

SPAZnik

I'd love to know what country you live in because
the way you express yourself
makes it hard to believe you were/are a witness,
least of all at bethel.

You said you weren't born in it,
how old were you when you got into it
and how soon after did you go to bethel?

my bethel servise left me seriously depressed!!!!

Share this