This just tears too deep into my gut... (page 2)

Van Gogh

An old pair of shoes versus fighting for the light... Ultimately none of us should die in a lie... all of your treasured comments up till now will be savored in the spirit of ultimate survival somehow...

JapanBoy

VG....I'm going through the same thing now.....actually since I was DF'd in 02.2005. Just hang in there and wait things out. Next month I will be divorced from a very beautiful woman who was my wife since 1979. My kids will not see me anymore but I do get the odd email or telephone call. I think that in time everything will improve in my life so I hope yu can have that attitude too. If you ever need anything PM me and I will try my best to give good advice.

Keep strong.

K

jgnat

Who wants to die in old shoes? Buy some shiny new ones.

Van Gogh

Japan Boy,
Being divorced from a beautiful woman... Keep strong

serendipity

((( Van Gogh)))

It's encouraging that your friend is getting outside help. Perhaps that will help him open his eyes wider to what the JW org is, at a pace he can take. I don't think it would be good to dump much more on him now. Just be there for him and keep in touch. And if you think you need it, maybe consult a counselor as well.

sspo

going thru the same as Japan boy

married to a beautiful woman since 79 and she is getting a divorce because of "apostasy" on my part.

LittleToe

I recall you telling me about your intentions to get in contact, a couple of weeks ago. Sorry to hear it twisted you up, though it sounds like it may have been a little better than you anticipated. Well done for making the first move Edited to add the following link that I hope you will respond to: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/117486/1.ashx

Dansk

Hi VG,

I do think I have mental issues

Your friend states probably what we all suffered when we first left the lie. I know Claire and I felt we were in mourning and I'm not ashamed to say I cried for around two weeks. That's what the Society does to us. It gives us promises that are complete lies and when we realise this it is so difficult to take.

For you and your friend, please accept that life DOES get better. Continually coming here is so beneficial because you are amongst friends with genuine empathy and a wonderful listening ear.

I know it's terribly difficult right now, but you are freshly out of the Org. It's quite normal that you feel the way you do. Remember, it wasn't God who was at fault but a bunch of horrible men who said they spoke on his behalf!

I know you still have great faith. Keep that faith as you move forward and remember all the wonderfully kind and friendly souls we met at the BBQ. Each one has a horror story to tell, but each one is moving forward with their life. You and your friend can, too!

We're all here for you!

Manly ((((((((HUGS))))))),

Ian

diamondblue1974

What can I do or say? Why destroy someones hope when losing just that is what is destroying me right now...?

I enjoyed meeting you at the BBQ and found you to be both articulate and intelligent but of course deeply troubled by all you are experiencing and thats no wonder.

When you discover the truth about 'the truth' it is like having the very foundations upon which you have built your life taken from under you and it can leave you unsettled and feeling that all was for nothing. This is entirely natural.

One thing that helped me was to try and change my perspective, I prefer to think of my experiences as a Jehovahs Witness to be a stage in my life from which I have learned a great deal and whilst their is a gap in my belief system left behind, I am now in a position to try and develop my own beliefs from my own experiences and research. The alternative of having my beliefs dictated to me is one I cannot now comprehend.

Try and keep positive, grieve by all means but dont let grief be your master.

I have PMed you my email address...feel free to keep in touch!

DB74

Crumpet

hello my precious

I may be wrong but I think you are just taking on his pain in a way and feeling bad for him.

I don't know why he was DFed, but I don't find it all unusual that he wants to go back - after all I did 3 times! But that was before I spent time reading here and realised that it was not the truth. If he investigates, with some prompting and direction that you can give him, his pain wuill be re-diverted initially but lessen eventually if he is able to open his mind fully. It takes time to come to terms with everything. You are only slowly realising that the truth wasn't the truth but you WILL find freedom with that realisation.

You have tremendous advantages and resources already which we already discussed (and I'm not talking about your looks AHEM!) more so than I do. Of course me being 50 years younger than you I have advantages over you! (Are you smiling yet, please just a bit?!)

Your friend is in a unique position which he would not have had as an elder. he is DFed and he can without risk of shunning take on board information which is here - amogst Lady Lee's Best of - that may help him reassess his whole situation in a very different light.

I know you'll do what is best. I trust you.

crumpy x

This just tears too deep into my gut...

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