Uninvited--A Wonderful "Witness" (page 6)

done4good

I don't claim to be Christian anymore, but would JESUS do that??? Dispicable.

j

((((((((((lesterd)))))))))) I am so sorry for what you experienced I know nothing we can say or do now can make things right or take away the pain, but I hope you will find here what I have found--real friends, real love and respect, real diversity and debate, real information. Welcome!

Yes, I hope this will help others be better prepared than I was for what may happen in their own situations.

I believe I had a right and an obligation to attend my mom's memorial, and I did it out of respect for her and those who loved her. The open invitation to the gathering afterward made it sound like I had a right to be there too, but since one of my relatives (who was quite close to my mom) helped the PO break my uninvitation to me gently, I didn't have any desire to go where I wasn't entirely welcome.

I just wish there was a way to let everyone who wanted to see me there know why I didn't attend. It still doesn't feel over and done. I think I'll e-mail the above-mentioned relative and tell him how I feel and ask what he would do...

~Merry

Merry Magdalene

p.s.

Wanted to thank you for your thoughts, Jankyn. You are so spot on.

Minister Amos: What else are you letting them dictate to you?

Well, this was about it (I hope). My mother was my last close connection with "them." I just can't seem to help being polite and timid and unwilling to make a fuss, and unwilling to cut myself off from them completely. Which I am now quite glad of in regard to my mother. But I guess I do have to expect a certain amount of unpleasantness and pain if I remain in contact with the rest of my relatives, don't I? It can be a tough choice for some of us....How much abuse am I willing to take and to what end??? Can I remain in contact with them without subjecting myself to their abuse?....hmmm...

~Merry

Seeker4

Good idea. Write him. The WTS has always put policy ahead of people. It's the rare individual elder who dares break that precedent. Unfortunately, your elder didn't have the cojones to be a compassionate human in your time of pain and grief.

S4

Wordly Andre

At my fathers Memorial service, I was stopped before I walked in the Kingdumb hall by some elder and my uncle, they told me how my fathers service was going to play out, and said that they decieded that there was not going to be anyone allowed to walk up and speak about him. Just one uncle who I know my dad didn't like, went up there and all I heard was Jehovah's witnesses believe in this and that, and nothing really of my dad. I hate HATE JW "Memorials" why not just call it a funeral?? Anyway afterwards at my parents house it was sickening to see that many JW's per square inch, I think they were just thre for the free food. A few of my high school friends came to say goodbye to my dad, I left the house with them and sat down in some cafe talked with them, they felt like my real family.

Scully

Y'know Merry, after spending several weeks with your mother before she died, and tending to her physical care at that point in her life, I have to wonder where the HELL these Friends™ were who dared to exclude you from a reception held in her memory.

Did that Elder™ - even once - come and help your mother get dressed, bathed, fed, etc. when she was in her weakest moments? If not, then what the hell kind of Shepherd™ does he think he is?

Isn't that just "special"? They won't help a member of their flock who is on their deathbed, and the burden of providing help is left to the person who has to travel hundreds of miles and take time away from work and family, and then this effing Elder™ has the unmitigated gaul to tell you that you cannot be present at a reception that is held in your mother's memory??

He deserves a kick square in the balls. If he had any.

I'm not a believer anymore Merry, and I don't know if you are or not, but if it helps at all, maybe you can find comfort in these words:

'Come, YOU who have been blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for YOU from the founding of the world. ... I fell sick and YOU looked after me. ... Then the righteous ones will answer him with the words, ‘Lord, ... When did we see you sick or in prison and go to you?’ And in reply the king will say to them, ‘Truly I say to YOU, To the extent that YOU did it to one of the least of these my brothers, YOU did it to me.’

When the time came, your mother knew just how much you cared about her... and you showed up those JWs for the false Friends™ that they are. They weren't there for her when she needed them; you were. Your actions were far more "Christian" than the JWs proved to be.

((((( Merry )))))

Grace

As I have written a number of times, I got kicked out of my step-daughter's JW wedding (I raised her from the age of 10 and brought her back from the brink of death when she was anorexic and ignored by her "pioneer" mother). But guess who rode in the limo and walked up the aisle at the KH? Her pioneer mother who didn't contribute five cents to the child in over a decade.

If things work out, my JW husband (15 yrs older than me) will die before me. I won't even alert the "brothers" nor his JW family because, after all, they aren't talking to me. I will put in an announcement of a secular memorial in the paper with the words "Jehovah's Witnesses are not welcomed." That way, I will be honoring my own husband who has been smart enough to have a wide range of friends and work colleagues. If the JWs do something on their own, who cares?

Grace

TooOpinionated

Oh Merry, I'm so sorry.

Sadly, I have been to funerals where this has happened. One was the daughter of the deceased. It opened my eyes, and it was the last Witnoid funeral I ever attended. I wish I had known then what I know now, because I would definitely have gone up to this woman and stuck to her side, instead of letting her be shunned. But I thought it all was "the truth". I still feel ashamed.

Hey, I'll help you write a few letters to your family and set the record straight. You can even use my email address (if you want to send them that way ) in case your addy is blocked.

bebu

This just makes me sick. And I'm sick that the PO doesn't even realize just how wretchedly he treated you on a day on which you needed comfort, not a knife. (((((Merry))))) I am so glad you had those weeks with your mom before she died. No JW elder can take those away. bebu

hubert

(((((Merry))))))

Very "christian" of him.

Sick bastard.

Hubert

Uninvited--A Wonderful "Witness"

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