Celebrating holidays

dobbie

Just wondering if you still abstain from celebrating christmas birthdays etc or if you do celebrate them how long did it take to feel comfy with doing it after you'd left the jws?I'm fading at the moment but although me and hubby have talked about spending xmas with our nonjw families and i told him i was going to start sending bday cards to my family, the thought of it scares me like its a big huge sin.Does it ever feel natural to celebrate holidays?I used to love all that sort of thing before i was a witness but when my mum and stepdad wished me happy bday last month it felt really odd and i was uneasy.I find it v confusing cos i can sort of see that jesus wasn't born in dec. but maybe he can have 2 bdays like the Queen!Also not being able to send fathers day cards this year was the final straw for me i felt so bad about it so i have lots of making up to do but just hope i can enjoy it all without feeling bad. I know they say some bday things have pagan origins but there are things jws can have or do that also are pagan.Wedding rings for example.Thanks

mama1119

the first thing I celebrated was my duaghters b-day, about 6 months after I stopped going. her bday is november so I just kept on going with Thanksgiving, Christmas etc. I will have to say, it took me a while to feel comfortable, not because it felt wrong, but because I didn't know what I was doing...but I do love holidays!!!!!

dobbie

Phew glad u answered mama119 was beginning to think i wasthe next threadkiller!oh rats...

Seriously i want my boys to have holidays to celebrate, its all about getting together with family for me. But after 14 yrs of not celebrating will be odd-not to mention expensive!

Honesty

I DA'd in November 2004 after learning the truth about the Watchtower Society..

I celebrated Christmas 2004 and 2005 and also Easter 2005 and 2006.

I intend on celebrating Christ's Incarnation every December until I leave this planet.

I intend on celebrating Jesus' victory over death and the empty tomb until I leave this planet.

The Watchtower Society has it ALL WRONG, plain and simple.

Bumble Bee

Hi dobbie,

Just do what feels comfortable for you. Many JW's celebrate holidays to a certain extent. At Thanksgiving and Christmas our family always got together to have a traditional meal with all the trimmings. My JW mother gives birthday presents. This has caused some problems with my sis in law. Her family is not JW and told her parents they can't give the kids bday gifts, but my JW mom does! Go figure.

While I would LOVE to have a Christmas tree and string lights etc, hubby still doesn't want to. We have some close friends we exchange gifts with and attend Christmas parties.

The expense can be handled. There are all kinds of homemade gifts you can do - gift baskets etc, and make sure you set a budget!!!

Things take time, so don't rush into anything before you're ready.

BB

Madame Quixote

I am always glad to hear that someone is leaving the JW organization, although it is never fast enough to suit me.

What the JWs taught us about holidays is shame- and fear-based (And Shame without the e is sham). What they teach has nothing to do with true love for humanity or community and nothing to do with generostiy. The Watchtower Society doesn't want us to celebrate holidays, esp. Xmas and birthdays, because that takes time, money and resources away from their greedy and un-Christian organization.

If what we do as individuals is about love, generosity and enjoying our families and friends in healthy ways, then we have no need to concern ourselves with what a cult told us to do or not to do. And that is what your uncomfortable feelings (guilt or shame or fear) regarding the holidays is all about - cult brainwashing.

It is much healthier to learn about and practice the positive aspects of holidays and celebrations; and understand the holidays both from a celebratory and spiritual/ethical point of view, such as giving generously to those in need throughout our communities in general, not just to the witnesses; while sharing good things and good times with our families.

By not celebrating and honoring "worldly" holidays we deny ourselves and our kids the wealth of cultural learning and socializing that goes with these occasions. And that is what being a JW is all about - accepting chronic brainwashing and denying our selves and our families of normalcy and balance. That brainwashing comes in the guise of "education" to enrich the JW cult at the expense of family.

I encourage you to learn as much as possible about the nature of that brainwashing and learn to enjoy all the holidays (and ooey, gooey Easter bunny marshmallows and snowmen you can stuff into your mouths).

Just do what feels like fun and enjoy your family. (And brush your teeth after the marshmallows). Bake some Xmas cookies with the kids, dance around the maypole in springtime, learn about the positive origins of celebratory living, rather than focusing on all of the negative or "bad" as the Watchtower would have you do.

There is no room for JW judgmentalism in any aspect of celebration. Try to let that go. That's what modern "paganism" and worldliness really entails anyway - celebrating and honoring life and the forces of nature and letting go of fear and the sham of shame-based religion.

Celebrate life and the holidays. Live, love, laugh! I do and have been out of the JWs since I was 15. Believe me, my 18-year-old is glad of it, too.

wonderwoman

I love holidays. Especially birthdays. The no bday rule was always stupid to me. Ah...some guy lost his head...ok..makes total sense.
How could the births of my two children not be the most important days of the year to me??
And my birthday is pretty cool too.

Also love love love Thanksgiving. The best part is no family drama. I get to spend it with my friend-family. While everyone else bitches about having to go here or there to see mom or auntie, I am drinking wine and sharing a fine feast with my favorite people.

It may feel awkward at first but start out small at your own pace. Someday you may find yourself fighting over that last kick-ass xmas tree and sending out corny christmas cards with the rest of them.

hamsterbait

JESUS CELEBRATED HANUKKAH.

Referred to in the Gospels as "the Festival" (NW) That is why in one of his speeches, he says "I am the light of the World". According to the WT, he is making a reference to the huge lamps in the temple that were kept burning day and night during the festival of rededication. They were so bright that at night it was almost like day in the courtyards.

Hanukkah is not a scriptural festival prescribed in the Jewish Law - it is actually commemorating Antiochus Epiphanes victory in driving the Greeks out of Jerusalem, and ending their sacrifices of pigs to the goddess Demeter.

COLOSSIANS 2:16, shows how far the witlesses have been misled and they have no right to shun people for their decisions on what to celebrate.

HB

Cordelia

yeah no birthdays coz the only time they are mentioned in the bible they were had by two bad men,

well on that reasoning we shouldnt wear eye makeup either, as that was only mentioned twice, one by a wicked king who killed everyone and one by jezabel,

so if you put your lipstick on tomorrow, you may as well send them cards

parakeet

How quickly you decide to celebrate holidays depends on your JW background. If you were brought up a JW from birth, I can imagine holidays and birthdays would be a little scary at first.
I was fortunate that I was in my early teens before being dragged into the JW cult, so I had good memories of my family celebrating holidays. As soon as I left as a young adult, I jumped in with both feet -- Christmas, Halloween, birthdays, Easter, Arbor Day, all of 'em, and loved every minute right up to this day.
You'll know when the time is right.

Celebrating holidays

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