by Xandria 17 Replies latest jw friends
For those who remember me and those who care, I am going through a tough time. Who ever said make lemonade out of lemons life handed you... had it wrong. Tequila! to take the bite out of things. (kidding) Seriously, though this one has me pretty down and for those who know me, it takes a lot to get me there.
X.
I don't know your background. What's up? Maybe some of us can help.
Xandria, I remember you. What's wrong? Can you give us an idea. I understand not wanting to share lots of details. I have had the toughest year and not shared a lot of it on the board here. But at least for now, the sun is getting brighter. Things are slowly getting better. And yes, this too shall really pass, even if "this" is something that kills you, it did pass.
Xandria - I hope that your okay. Let the people here give you all the support you need. Unburden all you have to your amongst friends.
This is a cheesy song from the 70's movie The Posideon Adventure, but the lyrics do inspire when life seems dark and cold.
"The Morning After"
(Song from "The Poseidon Adventure")
(As recorded by Maureen McGovern)
AL KASHA
JOEL HIRSCHHORN
There's got to be a morning after
If we can hold on thru the night
We have a chance to find the sunshine
Let's keep on looking for the light.
Oh can't you see the morning after?
It's waiting right outside the storm
Why don't we cross the bridge together
And find the place that's safe and warm.
It's not too late, we should be giving
Only with love can we climb
It's not too late, not while we're living
Let's put our hands out in time.
There's got to be a morning after
We're moving closer to the shore
I know we'll be there by tomorrow
And we'll escape the darkness
We won't be searching anymore.
There's got to be a morning after
(There's got to be a morning after)
There's got to be a morning after
(There's got to be a morning after)
There's got to be a morning after
(There's got to be a morning after)
There's got to be a morning after
(There's got to be a morning after)
There's got to be a morning after
(There's got to be a morning after)
There's got to be a morning after
(There's got to be a morning after).
((((((Xandria))))))
oh hon...I'm so sorry
Lisa
I hope things get better for you. I am sending good thoughts in your direction. Good luck!
Looking for a new job, dealing with a mortgage snafoo, someone debting money out of our account (against an agreement) and trying to get that settled and dealt with, it is a bit overwhelming. My husband and I are considering selling this place, once this issue with the mortgage co is cleared. Purchase something we own lock stock and barrel. I have worked on the other side of the phone with the same collections position and I know the fair debt and credit laws, when you have a pymt arrangement and call in to make that arrangement, only to find the arrangement broken (Not by us, by the company). It is disheartening, as well as a mess. All this has left us short on somethings, worrying, scrambling, stressing. If you argue with these people time goes by where they can proceed with more fees and other issues. So all our resources went to them. There are some other things too. But that is the main stab.
Mark and I are discussing moving and a change in our lives.
Mark and I are at our wits end, it almost feels like being ran over by a truck on life's highway. It just seems to hit all at once, ya know?
X.
Mark and I are discussing moving and a change in our lives.Mark and I are at our wits end, it almost feels like being ran over by a truck on life's highway. It just seems to hit all at once, ya know?
If your home is a good thing for you, wait to make the decision on whether to keep it until after you get things straight and can breathe again. If you're not that happy where you are, a change could do you a lot of good. "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." John Lennon
Life takes us on so many journeys we never expect to take. I heard someone speaking about change in life, the other day. She said that loss/change gives us opportunity to go places we didn't expect and to expand and to grow. She said most of us cling to the present and cause ourselves a lot of pain. We can ease that pain by seeing the upcoming changes as an adventure and of growth.
I understand as I have been through similar things in my past with the house my exhusband, a brother, and I owned. He still owns it. We nearly lost the house twice. It was advertised in the paper under auctions and we didn't know it until a sister called to inquire about it. We knew were going to be forclosed on, but not that it was in the local paper. Money from my relatives, twice, saved the house. Our Mortgage Co. wouldn't let you pay the payment a month late. You had to catch up all that was due or get further and further behind.
I gave him the house in the divorce. I got $7000 from it. He turned around and refinanced it and got $70,000 and there was not a thing I could do about it. The huge family room I had begun with my inheritance from my mother, well it was unfinished when our divorce happened. Now it's finished. I did get to sit in there for a few minutes once, since the divorce. He changed my bay window seat, a childhood dream of mine, to a flat wall and double window. How nice. I had wanted the room finished for my kids to entertain in during their teens. That never happened.
My point is: I'm happier these days. Now I rent. I have a nice, sunny two bedroom apartment in a completely different region of the country, with a different partner. I have a bay window in the livingroom, no seat, but it's big enough to display my birdhouses, Frog King and colored glass plant spritzers that are shaped like animals. I don't have any pictures up yet, due to the stress of the past year we've lived here. The amazing thing though is that everyone who walks in here remarks how cozy my home is. It is the light, the air and the spirit here, rather than the decor.
We've spent the entire year struggling with unemployment issues, both Andy and me and he is FINALLY back to work this week. After a year. My store closed in Feb of this year and since then I had one grandson come to live here and just got his five year old brother. The grandson story has been horrendously sad and stressful, but for now, they are safe with us. I haven't worked since Feb., but I may be able to go back to school when they do.
Andy likes his job better than the one he quit a year ago. I noticed this morning that we weren't deeply worried for a change. Through all this, we have never run to zero in either of our accounts and we've always had food to eat. Somehow, money always came through. It wasn't savings. I had used the last of my divorce settlement to get this apartment, so I could help my grandsons.
It's hard for you to see the dawn breaking there on the horizon, but it already is. You're probably going to like your life better in the next years. And you will look back and wonder how you ever doubted it for a moment, that the contentment would come. Contentment is more attainable than happiness anyway. Move towards contenment. There really is a morning after.
(((((Xandria)))))
Sorry to hear you're going through a tough patch. Things can really get us down sometimes, I know. I'm glad that you do have support in your Mark......it IS better than facing these things totally alone, even though they are difficult.
Please feel free to vent anytime........sometimes it does help!
hugs,
Annie
