He says use the rod?

by beautifulisfree 15 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • beautifulisfree
    beautifulisfree


    Has your child raising or discipline tatics changed since your out of the borg?

    I always thought that I would use spanking as a discipline. Since supposedly the bible encourages it. And although I don't have children yet....I think my view on 'spanking' has changed. I think the WTBS encourages parents to spank their children as just another fear tactic? ( I got plenty of spankings because I wouldn't sit still at the meetings or for just doing things that kids are supposed to do!! ) I want to be a good mom one day and just would like others thought on this...about things that work and things that don't. Thanks, beautifulisfree

  • candidlynuts
    candidlynuts

    i had great parents.. dad always said a shepard doesnt beat his sheep with a rod..he uses it to prod them gently in the direction he wants them to go.. we werent ever beaten our punishment was usually extra chores, being talked to by dad who'd make you answer his questions intelligently so you KNEW why you were being scolded... so i used that myself when i had kids.. i'd smack their hands when they were little and do stuff like try to stick a fork in a electrical outlet.. time outs, chores..etc..

    i found out the hard way that yelling just makes things worse..gets everyone more upset..so had to learn to bite my tongue.

    once you have kids you love them so much that you get to know what works and what doesnt and it differs from one kid to the next. usually if you have more than 2 kids, you'll have one that has behavioral problems and you end up sitting on that kid till he's 18 lol

  • lowden
    lowden

    Hello B is Free

    Some parents make the decision NEVER to administer physical punishment to their children and it seems to becoming a common way of thinking in the Western World.

    This is my opinion having brought up 3 boys (now aged 14, 16, 18). Each child is different and responds to different types of discipline.

    Now i think that smacking/spanking IS an acceptable form of discipline but it has to be used in moderation and cool-headed context.

    I all too often see parents nowadays being absolutely RULED by their kids, it's pathetic. It's currently happening to my friend.

    My final thought is this; Consistency, don't bend to their pressure when you as an adult KNOW your discipline is for your childs' good.

    Peace

    Lowden

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    I have spanked, rarely, after they scare the stuffing out of me. There are more appropriate actions for most behavior. They all need different things to get their attention for discipline(teaching/learning).

  • A Paduan
    A Paduan
    Since supposedly the bible encourages it.

    It depends what you read into the bible I suppose

    - rod of the Lord (to tell in truth)

    • "with the rod of his mouth"
    • " The Assyrians will be terror-stricken at the voice of the Lord, when he smites with his rod."

    - rod of men (a punitive suffering that is physically incurred)

    • jw use: a beating utensil

    -----------------------------------------------------------

    I fear no evil; for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    Hi beautiful is free,

    I was one of the more lenient JWs. I personally decided spanking was the last resort, and I had to try at least 3 other things before spanking. I seldom had to spank my daughter and she's turned out great.

    I think that the method of discipline depends on the child. I've heard some men (and my mother) say that the only thing that reached them was spanking.

  • mama1119
    mama1119

    My parents were pretty rare spankers, but I tell ya, I have seen some major JW spankers in my life. Sometimes it seemed like parents at the KH would wait for any reason to exert authority over their small children. I myself am not a spanker, I am a swatter...I only do one swat when needed, but man do I feel awful. She so rearely gets swatted though, so when she does, she knows to listen, so it does work!

  • Hellrider
    Hellrider

    At a meeting once, I couldn`t sit still (well, it happened more than once, but this time was "special"). After the meeting, I had to bend over the hood of the car in the street outside the KH, and my father spanked me (hard) while the entire congo walked by. What made it so extremely humiliating (apart from the fact that the whole cong saw it) was the fact that I was no little kid at the time, I was around 10 years old. I have always hated him for that one time. There were plenty others, but that one time is the one that sticks to mind, and for which I hate him. I never forgave him that. SPANKING IS WRONG! You don`t teach your child to love and be a good person by hitting the child! If you spank your child, he/she could grow up and be like me, a person hating his own (now deceased) parents. Don`t make your children hate you.

  • kid-A
    kid-A

    You don`t teach your child to love and be a good person by hitting the child!

    Well put Hellrider. Children learn and model on example. What is the lesson learned by hitting a child? That using violence is an effective way to deal with another human being that disagrees with you. Children at any age are not cattle. They have intuitive intelligence and barring some severe psychiatric disorder, they can be reasoned with in a rational and intelligent matter. Physical Violence (and yes, ANY act of striking another human being, regardless if it is the butt, hand, face, IS an act of violence and aggression) is a cop-out. I have seen children treated in ways that I would not even dream of treating a dog.

  • inbyathread
    inbyathread

    Spanking to cause physical pain is wrong just as striking someone across the face would be wrong.

    Biblically, a strike across the face was done for humiliating the individual or causing embarasement.

    I see nothing wrong with a swat on the bottom on a child that is misbehaving. The swat is not to cause pain but to get the childs attention. Most parents have already done the speaking to the child thing. Asking they not behavior in that manner. The child is not listening and the parent needs another method to get the childs attention.

    No everybody will agree with this but even Dr. Spock wrote that america raised a generation of brats because of not spanking.

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