Who Was The Weirdest Person In Your Congregation?

by Arthur 40 Replies latest jw friends

  • Moomin
    Moomin

    Jim Tx

    I just would nod, and give brief answers - looking down at the floor - hoping that he would go away, which he did eventually.

    Lol - I still do that

    I just figured that I was practicing for the days when we would be questioned in small little rooms by the 'opposition', before Armageddon. *shrug*

    lol thats really funny.

  • gaiagirl
    gaiagirl

    When I was small, there was an elderly pioneer brother whose wife had died years before. I'll call him "Brother Wheat". Brother Wheat really did have a heart of gold, and wouldn't knowingly offend anyone, unless they said something contrary to the Society. He was one of the annointed, perhaps the only one we had at that time. I'm not sure what he did for money, but he apparantly had very little, as he drove the most beat up cars, and wore the oddest mismatched clothes from Goodwill. He was only 60 or so when I met him, but looked as if he were 90 or 100, bone thin, with horrible teeth and some kind of sores on his face which would heal then reappear. He walked kind of stopped over, as if he could not straighten up, perhaps he had been injured, or just had poor posture, or simply advancing age and declining health (not sure which). He had very strange ideas concerning diet and nutrition, and liked to go to restaurants which served fried chicken during field service breaks. He would get a drumstick, and eat the whole thing, including the bones, claiming that the bones provided extra calcium (I suppose he was probably right). He moved away for a couple of years, hoping the climate in central Texas would suit him better than on the coast, but after a while, he moved back, and remained on the coast until he died some years later.

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    WElcome slinky!

  • Arthur
    Arthur

    Great posts everyone. This is the first chance I've had to come back and read your posts.

    Here's mine:

    When I was a little kid, there was this old brother who would get up during the meeting and walk back to the bathroom. While walking down the isle (this was during the talk mind you) he would fart really loud. It was those kinds of farts that come out in 2-3 incremental spurts. A couple of times, I walked into the bathroom when he was at the urinal. He would be standing there with one hand braced up on the wall. (I kid you not). He would be standing there groaning really loud, going: "Ahhhhhhhhhhhh". He wore olive green pants with like a gray suit jacket. I swear, he was just like a character you would see on Seinfeld.

  • MungoBaobab
    MungoBaobab

    The brother of the PO was tremendously obese, like the Grimmace from McDonald's fame (the sweaty, grunty type). He also had an artificial leg, as he had lost his in a motorcycle accident. Anyway, he described how, when he got home from meeting, removed his leg from his torso and kept it inside his pants leg. I guess the idea was that the next day for service he could slip both on right away! He also urinated in the front lawn of a not-at-home going door to door. Somehow he managed to get a fiance, and, during his first dinner with her parents, discussed how many times a week they should have sex. Guees what? She called it off. And all these stories came from his own mouth.

  • Purza
    Purza

    I know one brother that used essential oils to cure all your ailments. He believed these oils were the cure for cancer, AIDS, etc. You name it and it was a cure all. He would come smelling like various oils that had names such as "inner child" (supposedly to reach your inner child if you wore it) and other aptly named oils (which I cannot recall at this time). Because of his obsession it totally turned people off. They would groan when they would see/smell him coming.

    Always made me wonder whether or not he really believed in god and the new system -- because he sure put his faith in those oils.

    Purza

  • hambeak
    hambeak

    I guess maybe I was for a time because when I would give an hour talk or conduct the WT study I would say BANG you know wake them up and they would jump because it got kind of boring I laughed to myself like hell. After a while I was told I was to annimated on the podium. and I ended up just a reader of the Wt on sundays but I sometimes fell asleep on the podium.

  • misspeaches
    misspeaches

    LOL - I know exactly who Chuckie is referring to. The same old biddy had a massive crush on all the young brothers in the congregation. She would pursue them like a dog in heat! Then another sister in the cong married a brother 35 years her junior. My goodness was the first one jealous!

    She particularly liked one of the MS Pioneers and would threaten him that one day when he came to pick her up for witnessing she would be dressed in only her bra and knickers.

    Despite being 70+ she used to sprout off all the time saying she had the body of a 40 year old. Trust me... she didn't!

  • ColdRedRain
  • Arthur
    Arthur
    The brother of the PO was tremendously obese, like the Grimmace from McDonald's .
    He also had an artificial leg, as he had lost his in a motorcycle accident. Anyway, he described how, when he got home from meeting, removed his leg from his torso and kept it inside his pants.
    Somehow he managed to get a fiance, and, during his first dinner with her parents, discussed how many times a week they should have sex.

    LOL ! That's great. Hey, did anyone say to him: "Is that a fake leg in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?" And the part about Grimmace talking to his future in-laws about sex. Maybe that sister just wasn't into Happy Meals.

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